The New Harry
by Siriusly345
Summary: When Harry returns to Hogwarts in his seventh year, everyone is shocked by the way he looks. Hilarity ensues, when everyone in the world falls in love with his appearance. Too bad Harry's too modest to notice.
1. Of gaping, and Harry

**Chapter 1: Of gaping, and Harry**

* * *

Disclaimer: I'm not a millionaire, so I don't own Harry Potter. This plot is by Ari Munami.

GINNY'S POV

I'm sure you've heard about my little obsession with Harry Potter. It is pretty obvious. All the blushing, stuttering, and constant staring I do around him kind of states how I feel about him.

I have always been like that but lately I've been acting a little less like a second year around Harry. I still have feelings for him but I've been less obvious about it. Recently I've been more distant and I've managed to speak to him for more than five minutes without stuttering once. I've become quite confident near him, partly because I've finally started having my fair share of experience concerning blokes. In fourth and fifth year, I had two long-term boyfriends, and a couple of two-week flings. That alone is probably the whole reason I've had more self-control around him.

I've never really known what attracts me to Harry so much. He's never been particularly handsome over the years. He was always a little taller than the rest of us, causing his physique to be more like an overly stretched string-bean. His glasses always made him look incredibly geeky, but nobody's ever bothered to mention this to him partly because he would've got really self conscious about it. Truth is Harry is rather…not confident about certain things.

I think his personality and his reputation was what made me become obsessed with him. He's always so modest and caring that even anyone would grow to like him. Although Voldemort probably would not be included in that number…And the best part is that he hasn't let all the fame and glory go straight to his head. Instead of becoming this arrogant and obnoxious person, who's deeply, deeply in love with himself; he became marginally confident, modest, caring, I could go on forever.

Sometimes, he would let it get to his head but that was only when he was trying to get a laugh. And the other thing I love about him…Yeah, I love him. I figured it out two years ago, when I got all jealous when he was with Cho. I didn't know what I felt for him until I felt like ripping Cho's hair out when I saw her tossing her hair and "accidentally" dropping food down her shirt so that Harry's gaze would follow her hands reaching down to lick the speck of pudding that fell into her cleavage. Please, that's not even a classy move.

That's when I realised that I wasn't just infatuated with Harry; I was in love with him and that scared me like nothing else. I mean, at the time, I was only fourteen. How could I possibly be in love? Especially with someone I was barely even good friends with? So I went out with a ton of guys; to try in vain to forget about him. It didn't work. So I decided to stop acting like a slag, and stop stringing along these poor blokes when it was clear that I barely had any interest in them, and just become better friends with Harry. I did that which resulted in my cool and charming demeanor around the infamous Boy-Who-Lived.

Unfortunately all my hard work went out the door, when I, and everyone else, saw him the summer of my sixth year. The only thing that makes me happy about the fact that I now have to start all over again is that I wasn't the only one that turned into a puddle at the mere sight of him of his gorgeous pectorals…

It was the week before we would be returning to Hogwarts for their seventh year and my sixth year. Ever since Voldemort was resurrected, Harry has been under strict orders to stay at his aunt and uncle's house, so we hadn't seen him the entire holiday. All of us were super excited to see him again, since we couldn't talk about anything of real importance using owls. During these dark times, anything could be intercepted.

When Harry left at the end of his sixth year he was of more than average height, still had his geeky glasses, and had a rather muscular physique from the years of Qudditch and running from Death Eaters. Many girls had noticed his physique and Harry had a fair amount of girlfriends in his sixth year. The world was paying a little more attention to him and Harry was under a ton of pressure. He was dubbed "the chosen one," so people expected him to be a super human. During those times, I became Harry's personal confidante; a fact that still makes me immensely pleased.

Anyway, the whole Weasley family, Hermione, Remus, Tonks, Sirius...all of us was there on August 31st in the kitchen of Grimmauld Place. We were incredibly psyched to see him again, especially me because this was the first time I would start a school term on incredibly good terms with Harry.

Dumbledore had offered to pick him up; mysteriously telling us he had business to take care of while he was there. So all of us were grouped around the kitchen table sitting in silence and nervously flinching every once in a while. The only one who wasn't fidgeting was Sirius, and that was probably because he had seen Harry last week on a secret mission.

Now that I think back, Sirius had been reclined in his chair, smirking a little to himself as he tilted his seat onto two legs. He had known exactly what Harry would come back as but he hadn't even warned us. Smug bastard. Pardon my French but I'm still a little frustrated about the whole thing, I would've loved the fore warning.

Anyway, finally after sitting in silence for one hour, we heard the familiar screeching of Mrs. Black, the curtains being whooshed by, the door ominously slamming, and footsteps approaching. I held my breath in anticipation and tapped my feet anxiously. Out of the corner of my mouth I saw Sirius' smirk widen.

Finally, Dumbledore came in, and swept his arm to showcase Harry, his purple robes swishing being the only sound once Harry stepping in. From behind Dumbledore, Harry stepped into the room with a wide and gorgeous grin on his face.

The breath I had held in stayed in my throat and my face reddened because of pure desire and embarrassment and because of the lack of air getting to my lungs. Finally I let out a huge breath and my mouth opened wide unconsciously.

I wanted to see what everyone else's reactions were but I physically couldn't move my eyes from Harry who was currently looking slightly confused and disappointed about everyone's lack of reaction.

Sirius broke the silence by dropping the legs of his chair onto the floor and noisily moving over to Harry. Covering Harry completely in a hug, Sirius loudly started talking to him; to make us come out of our daze. Closing my eyes, I tried to take deep breathes, but ended up failing because of the rather graphic pictures that swam in my head. Desperately trying to stop thinking of certain things, I opened my eyes and saw everyone in the kitchen walking over to Harry and hugging him rather weakly; most of them still in the stunned state. I walked over to him, like the rest, and started talking; bad idea on my part.

"H-H-Harry." I practically sigh his name. He smiled at me and my knees literally gave way. He easily caught me, and held me in his warm arms for a while, peering at me with his concerned green eyes through his glasses. I sighed dreamily before he placed me upright again.

And how did Harry look to merit this sort of behavior? Like this. Over the holiday , he had got very tanned, not too dark, not even to the point of sunburn. Just perfect; he was toasted to perfection. And even though he was wearing his glasses that only made him even hotter since they seemed to frame his face better since it filled out over the summer. He had grown a little under half a foot, towering over even Ron. His hair had grown a little and the contrast between the darkness of his hair and the slight darkness of his skin looked magnificent. He was wearing a tight green shirt that clung to his newly formed muscles. And the shirt matched his emerald eyes that were happily sparkling with life at that very moment. Two rows of white teeth shined brightly as Harry smiled his lopsided grin with absolute happiness. And most importantly, he just seemed to glow, like his skin was radiating off light. He seemed to have more confidence altogether.

After a few hours of awkward tension lingering in the house, all of us managed to welcome Harry thoroughly. It been a couple hours since dinner and I am still blushing at the thought of Harry and what I foolishly did. I dipped my elbow into the butter bowl five times and got pasta sauce all over my chin. Then I continuously mumbled and stared at Harry. I tripped down and up the stairs three times that night and I dunked my hair into my soup four times at dinner.

* * *

I've officially decided to dye my hair blonde because being a redhead sucks. Why? Because each time Harry or even the thought of Harry comes to mind, my cheeks burn red. Partly because of the earlier incident last night and Harry's amazing body. I have blamed this fully on my redhead complexion so that is why I had found my favourite Witch Weekly and cast a spell on my hair. This was a huge mistake since my hair turned this green/purple/blue colour. It was a colour Tonks couldn't pull off even if she completely changed her face. And since the colour was permanent, I had to stay like that for ten hours until it finally wore off. Imagine my nightmare when Harry saw me. I had walked down to dinner with my sweatshirt completely blocking the view of my horrendous hair. Unfortunately, Fred had banished my sweatshirt so then my vest was in full view with an outright display of my hair. When I had seen Harry, I started freaking out and covered my hair with my hands. But he just removed them, held my hands in his, and said…He said…

"I like it. It's unique." He said in his now fully deepened voice with a hint of mirth.

"Oh." I said faintly, sounding like a complete idiot. I stared at him for a while before running up the stairs, once again, mortified.

The next day, we arrived late to the train, almost missing it. And that is why the most of the school didn't see Harry until he stepped into the Great Hall.


	2. Of reactions

HARRY'S POV

Quite honestly, I think everyone has gone insane. Like is there something wrong with me, or what? I'm really confused right now.

GINNY'S POV

As all four of us (Harry, Ron, Hermione, and I) stepped into the Great Hall, this collective silence went over all the tables, and the rest of us stopped from having so many people look in our direction at the same time. Harry, oblivious as ever, elegantly stretched his long legs, and practically strutted past all of us with a roll of his eyes at our abrupt halt. His caramel tanned hand reached up, and ruffled his raven black hair as the muscles in his arms rippled in response under his a little too tight button down shirt. He was wearing his last year's uniform, and since he had gained height and muscle since last year the uniform was tight but pleasantly so. He had the first two buttons undone and the tie was all loose over his, no doubt, delectable neck that I would love to drape my arms over in the heat of the moment...Sigh. Harry didn't pay any mind to the gaping hall, and sat down leisurely next to Lavender Brown, who nearly fainted when she smelled his cologne. He smiled at Lavender making her gasp at his pearly whites, and the way his eyes sparkled when he smirked so charmingly. I would've fainted a little also if Harry was sitting as close to me as he was to Lavender.

Anyway, everyone, even the teachers, stopped eating and just stared at him as he devoured a chicken leg, licking the moist meat slowly with his tongue before opening his mouth, showing a glimpse of his white teeth, before finally biting down, and swallowing a sizable amount of chicken. I can safely say that watching Harry Potter eat a chicken leg is probably the most erotic thing half the people in the hall will ever see; at least that's what their faces are saying. The girls were staring with their mouths wide open, some speaking excitedly, and the guys with awed and amused smiles on their faces. Now, in my opinion, the real hilarity was in the teacher's reactions. And here they are:

McGonagall: Blushed bright red, stared at him for a while, and then looked back onto plate blushing even deeper.

Flitwick: Was sipping pumpkin juice, and ended spitting all of it on a very disgruntled Snape. Blushed a deep red after, and started choking.

Snape: Frowned even deeper, but managed to harbor a slightly bewildered look on his face, but only for a split second.

Remus Lupin, DADA: Normal glance at Harry and back to his plate. Remus had seen Harry numerous times over the summer unlike us.

That is all the observation I managed to gather on the teachers. Now onto certain students:

Malfoy: A confused yet interested and appreciative look passed over his face. Ending with sneer yet still slightly confused.

Colin Creevey: The only way to describe his expression is by saying that Colin probably thought Harry was the answer to his prayers.

Cho Chang: A sorrowful yet awed expression.

Crabbe: An awed and dreamy look. Huh. Interesting.

With Harry still happily munching on his dinner, leaving a mess on his shirt, but making him all the more endearing, conversation started again in the Great Hall, mostly all about Harry. Actually, every conversation was about Harry…even ours, and we were sitting right next to him.

Hermione and I were having a whispered conversation about Harry. Harry was still eating his chicken with gusto, still completely oblivious, and not noticing the entire excited buzz around him or the lusty glances he was getting from half the hall. Ron was quietly humming while stuffing his face with anything he could get his hands on.

Hermione and I had stopped talking, and went back to our food in silence, both of us still glancing at Harry occasionally. The rest of the dinner went by slowly, still in silence. I was still slightly in shock by both the way Harry looked and by how oblivious he really is. I think I actually saw Harry look at himself from the reflection of his spoon. He just held it front of his face for a minute, then shook his head, and went back to his food. Staring occasionally at Harry, I reveled in his appearance. The candles really reflected well against his defined cheekbones…He had stopped eating and was instead staring blankly into space, occasionally thrusting his hands into his hair, and making me wish that I could run my own fingers through his soft glistening hair, and down his hard pectorals...He really had no clue that anyone was thinking the dirty thoughts that I was, if only he saw it though. Turning my head, I looked around the Great Hall, and noticed almost everyone staring at him again. The teachers had cooled their act a little more, and most of them only had a light blush on their cheeks.

The only weird thing that happened was when Malfoy stood up and shouted "NOT!" I found the whole ordeal quite hilarious. Apparently, Harry did too because he started laughing right away. Although, any misfortune on Malfoy's part is hilarious to Harry.

By the end of dinner, the hype about Harry's new look was even higher than before. Most of the girls were sending Harry furtive glances, blushing all the way, and giggling helplessly. The guys were being a little less obvious, occasionally looking over at him in interest and some even in jealously

Harry looked over at one group of giggling girls, trying to be polite, and smiled at them when we were leaving for the common room. He was once again unaware that they were giggling because of him. The response was instantaneous, and most of the girls started giggling like crazy. Harry continued walking in a leisure pace, and most of the people blindly followed after him. This progressed until Harry walked up the boy's staircase, and even then some girls tried to follow him up. Harry didn't hear them. Until one of them screamed when he took his shirt off…

A/N: PLEASE REVIEW!


	3. Of childhoods, and incredulity

**Disclaimer:** I'm not a multi-millionaire. So I obviously don't own Harry Potter.  
AUTHOR'S NOTE: Just to clear some things up...Not all of Hogwarts is gay, it's just that Harry is so attractive that even if you were the same gender as Harry you'd have to appreciate his appearance somewhat. But, obviously, that doesn't apply to Dumbledore. Enough about that...Here's chapter three. Sorry, it's a little short...

HARRY'S POV

I hadn't had the most awesome childhood ever. Living with the Dursley's certainly wouldn't have made that possible. Ever since I was little I have despised my distant family. Aunt Petunia would make me do chores every day, and if I didn't finish them I didn't get dinner that night. That's mostly why I was so gangly when I came to Hogwarts.

Vernon would always insult my parents, and blame everything that went wrong in that house hold on me. Most of the time whatever had happened wasn't my fault, or I had no idea how they could have happened in the first place. The whole family was completely obsessed on being normal to the point where it actually made them abnormal. Petunia would frequently watch the other neighbors over the fence, compulsively looking for any abnormality. Dudley would torment me any waking minute, and sometimes even when I was asleep. During our school years, Dudley and his gang of delinquents would use me frequently as a punching bag. After the first few times, I'd learned not to cry out in pain when it happened; the sound would only encourage them.

Until the eleven year of my life, I had lived in a cupboard under the stairs. Every night during those years, I would wish that someone would come and save me. At first, the wishes were that my parents would indeed be alive, and would sweep me out of that place, ending future misery for me. Giving me the chance to feel loved, and have an actual family who cared about me. When that didn't come true, I wished for anyone to come. Anyone to come and save me from these horrible people. And sometimes, as an added bonus, I would wish for someone who would love me. So, yeah, my childhood could be called fairly terrible.

Until Hogwarts came along, my life was like that, and I had no backbone whatsoever. After my first year, I had developed a sort of confidence, where I didn't put up with most of the Dursley's shit. Usually that would land me in a heap of trouble, but anything to irritate Uncle Vernon was fine by me.

My summers were spent mostly locked indoors, cleaning dishes, tidying bedrooms, and occasionally mowing the lawn. I would usually put up with doing all these things, for lack of anything better to do. Mostly because I was completely cut off from the Wizarding world, my main entertainment.  
But the summer of seventh year, I didn't put up with them. After the DA, and everything else that happened, I had gained more of a self-confidence, and I realised that if I could face the darkest wizard in a long time...Then I didn't have to put up with my 'family's' crap anymore. Also I was feeling too good in myself, and didn't want to feel any more degraded by those demons than I already have in the past.

So, in the summer of seventh year, I became a tad rebellious. The beginning of my day would go a little like this. Waking up at 1pm, ignoring the orders of Aunt Petunia, sidestepping Dudley, and shoving a piece of toast in my mouth. I would run out the door for my daily workout routine. Running around the neighborhood for 30 minutes. Doing numerous push ups, crunches, stretching, the usual. After that I would walk over to this muggle cafe, and chat up a girl I met last summer. After indulging in that, my next step would be wandering aimlessly for lack of anything better to do. Sometimes I would hail the Knight Bus, go to Diagon Alley, and spend a little money on myself. I had totally disregarded Dumbledore's command to stay at the Dursley's the entire summer until he could bring me to Grimmauld place. I knew for a fact that when I spent my days at the muggle cafe or at Diagon Alley that an Order member was following me the entire time. I just didn't pay any mind to them. In fact, I even played pranks on them occasionally. Tonks was the only one who found the pranks remotely funny even when she was covered in whipped cream, and the chicken feathers that I had conjured...Don't worry, I had turned seventeen by that time, so no Ministry owls came to my doorstep.

Now, after all that I'd done the previous summer, I can understand that I have a little more confidence, and I'm definitely more independent.

And sure, I might have got my growth spurt, and gotten a bit of a tan. But those two things don't merit the type of behavior, I am receiving from my closest friends. All they do now is stutter and blush, and I barely get to talk to them anymore. So that just sucks.

Quite frankly I don't know why they're acting like this. Either Voldemort has possessed them (although Voldy dearest can't possibly have the ability to blush), or they became loony themselves. I don't look anymore different from last year, and they weren't fawning over me then. I just don't see the hordes of girls and guys that are supposedly following me around this year.

So, the morning of the first day of seventh year, something happened that I'm not sure how or why it happened. Let's just say it was possibly the most embarrassing moment of my life.


	4. Of embarrassing moments, newspaper cover

GINNY'S POV

It had occurred on the day classes started for sixth year. I was in the Gryffindor common room with Hermione; we were both sitting in armchairs waiting for Harry, Ron, and Neville to come downstairs. The common room was suspiciously full at the moment, and I was slightly apprehensive about what was surely going to happen. I also had a weird feeling it had something to do with Harry. And, since I am Ginny Weasley, I was right. It had gone down like this.

Hermione and I were talking about our classes when we heard a scream. It had come from the boy's staircase but it was unusually high pitched. It sounded like Harry's scream because I heard it once at dinner when he had seen a small mouse. Once his scream had been going on for 40 seconds, I was officially concerned and slightly intrigued. But I stayed in my seat because I wanted to know why so many girls had started giggling like crazy.

I got my answer when Harry came running down the stairs, clad only in boxers, with a small crowd of mice following him. When he came to the ending of the stairs, the mice still following him, he started running around in circles and flapping his arms in a really weird way. The mice were starting to climb onto him, and some were just running around him. By this time, the whole Gryffindor tower had come out to see what was going on even though Harry had stopped screaming.

You see, Harry has had an irrational fear of mice since he was five. He got into a situation that included one hundred mice, two gallons of syrup, a bulldog, and a tube of toothpaste. Harry has never personally told us what happened but he had to explain himself a little when he started screaming from a mouse. Harry has referred to that moment when everyone heard him scream as the most embarrassing moment of his life. But that would soon change.

Anyway the crowd was just standing there shocked and pleased by Harry's outfit. Even though I was trying really hard not to fancy Harry anymore, I had to admit he looked scrumptious. He was very well defined in the chest, and his abs was just mm... And the way he was flinging his arms made the muscles in his chest and arms ripple and flex. Distantly, I could hear cameras being snapped, and the giggling intensified as the scene went on.

The color of his skin is like light caramel, not too much to get you sick, but just enough to keep you satisfied. Snapping out of my star struck daze, I banished the mice away, and Harry finally stopped bouncing around. He realised what he had been doing, and he blushed heavily. The dull red spread across his cheeks, and his raven covered head ducked down in absolute embarrassment. The blush brought out his tan and contrasted beautifully with his luminous black hair. My only thought was:  
'He looks even better when he is blushing.' I sighed dreamily. I could still hear the cameras taking pictures rapidly. After a few seconds of standing there in shocked silence, Harry finally turned on his heel and stretched his long legs to a brisk run. We stared adoringly after him as he ran to his dorm, with his back muscles rippling in response and his boxers riding way too long low on his hips for any of us not to have any lusty thoughts.

A chorus of moans and sighs came after. Soon all guys and girls were crowded around the pictures, and reveling over Harry. I, personally, was in the back because I wanted to see the photos, but I did not want to be so obvious. While I was peeking over people's shoulder, I noticed Hermione nab one photo that was on the corner of the table the pictures were currently spread over. I made a mental note to ask Hermione if I could have that later. A few minutes later, Harry and Ron finally came downstairs. Ron was laughing at Harry's misfortune, and Harry was still blushing heavily. One of the giggling guys, yes guys, noticed Harry and gathered all the pictures quickly. Harry was too busy staring at his feet to notice. I, for one, found it very hard to look at Harry without thinking about his earlier attire...

By lunch time, the news of Harry's strange moment was spread all over the school. Crabbe was looking particularly come-hither at lunch, and I was slightly concerned for Harry should he ever be alone with him in the same room. Harry was, of course, beyond embarrassed that day and could not really look anyone in the eye.

The pictures were all over school over the whole week, which gave Harry even more reason to be mortified. Harry has remained slightly oblivious to the pictures to us but I'm pretty sure he's noticed. Hermione and I had neglected to mention it, although I think Harry knows, even if he hasn't said anything.

The photos were everywhere now; even some of the teachers had a copy. Someone who had taken the originals had done a duplicating spell on them so now there were plenty to go around. Hermione even told me that she had seen a Hufflepuff trade money for a copy. She and I suspect people are actually selling them, since in the past week, the copies and originals started running out. Ron pointed out to me at lunch, Professor Snape looking at something at under the table. That something looked suspiciously thin and square, so probably one of the photos. I found that especially funny because it is basically common knowledge that Snape hates Harry. Though, Snape looking at a picture of Harry in only his boxers is slightly disturbing. Ew.

I'm quite sure that over the past week, every student in Hogwarts has a copy. So it's a miracle that Harry hasn't mentioned it yet. Although he did look slightly uncomfortable after he saw Seamus paying for a photo at dinner.

On Friday, something shocking happened. Hermione, Ron, Neville, Harry, and I were eating breakfast when Parvati came rushing towards us. After living in the same house as her for the past six years, she and I were pretty good friends. So she ran over to me, and sat right down.

Excited, she started talking. "Guess what I got? The newest edition of a muggle newspaper." Proudly, she showed the copy. And my heart nearly stopped. On the cover was Harry clad in snitch boxers, blushing and looking at his feet. Over his head were the words:

"The next Robert Pattinson?" Hermione's eyes widened and she grabbed the newspaper. She flipped through the edition to the main spread, where five pictures of Harry's incident on Monday were displayed with a short article and interview. Quickly all three of us read the article and looked over the pictures. Only then did I notice, Harry standing over my shoulder, a horrified expression covering his face. My eyes widened and I quickly hid the newspaper from his view. Too bad Harry was a little too fast for me. He grabbed the newspaper right out of my hands, and looked over the cover.

"Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god." He mumbled continually. Carefully, Ron and I led him out of the Great Hall, toward the Room of Requirement. The whole walk there, Harry was still mumbling.

Finally we reached the Room and paced three times in front; thinking of a sitting room. When the door appeared, Harry ran in and flung the magazine across the expansive room. Next, he let out a string of curses that would've made even Voldemort blush. Finally, after a couple of minutes, Harry let out a sigh, sat on a chair, and said, mostly to himself, in a calm voice:

"How could this have happened?"

We said nothing, until I decided to tell him everything we had observed over the week. So I quickly told him everything, the selling, photos, teachers, and Snape. Afterward, all he muttered was "Great" in this thoroughly sarcastic voice. After a few minutes of standing in silence, Ron spoke.

"So, what are we going to do?"

'Way to go, Ron.' I thought sarcastically. Harry merely shook his head.

"I don't know. When will they give me a break? Is someone in the heavens laughing at me right now? Are they thoroughly amused?" He moaned. And I blushed at the deep sound that rumbled out of his chest. That sound and the fact that I still couldn't look at Harry without thinking of him in only boxers, left me with pretty vivid daydreams.

I pushed the thought of skulking over to him, gently plopping onto his lap and lowering his lips down to my waiting lips away and instead walked over to Harry. Us three tried to comfort him the best we could.

* * *

The rest of the week that ensued was pure torture for Harry Potter. That single newspaper was the best selling edition in muggle history. They had to reprint them because they sold so many so fast. Over the past week, there were even some students from Beauxbatons and other schools who transferred to Hogwarts.

During that week, walking into the halls without seeing a copy of a particular newspaper was impossible. Harry has never been as embarrassed as he was then. He seemed to walk down the halls with a permanent blush splashed across his cheeks. I found it slightly concerning...and hilarious.

Giggling girls followed his every step, and people were constantly flirting with him or trying to gain his attention. Poor Hedwig arrived every morning with a load of love letters, and fan letters. Harry even received a Howler one morning, which proclaimed her love for him and sent kisses his way at the end. He had been bombarded by journalists pleading for interviews; Rita Skeeter even sent a letter. He burned that one after curiously reading that she'd like to interview him in a smaller broom closet this time. Overall, in my opinion, it's a miracle Harry could drag himself out of bed in the morning. Let's all just hope this blows over soon.


	5. Of voices, and muggle songs

DRACO'S POV

Ever since I was a little kid, I have been taught to hate certain people. Mostly muggle-borns, half-bloods, half-breeds, blood traitors, and Potters. Apparently there was a little rivalry and hatred between my great great grandfather, Tiberius Malfoy, and Potter's great great grandfather, Charlusius Potter. They were friends before some tangled love affair happened, and then they became enemies. And so it began. My great great grandfather taught his children to hate every Potter conceived, who taught their children, and so on and so on, until every Malfoy hated every Potter with a passion.

You'd think that the Potters are too goody two shoes to teach their children something like hatred. But under their little facade, they're just as underhanded as the rest of us. Apparently, while the Malfoys were teaching their children to hate the Potters, the Potters were doing the same except the other way around, of course.

So, as you can see, I've been programmed from day one to hate Harry Potter.

Yes, before seventh year, I loathed him. I thought he was arrogant, rude, and undeserving of all the attention he received. But that somehow changed…

You see, on the train coming back to Hogwarts, again, I heard tons of whispers about Potter. Usually people are whispering about him in either admiring whispers or 'what has he done now' whispers. But this time they were mostly shocked whispers...and admiring whispers.

At the Slytherin end of the train, everyone was going crazy. All anyone talked about was Potter. _Slytherin_ girls were giggling. I never thought I would hear that, and let me tell you, it's not something I want to hear ever again. Hearing manipulative girls honking in hysterics was something I didn't think my marvelous ears would be hearing today. So that in mind, I had locked myself in a compartment with only my closest comrades.

At that time, I had no idea what all the fuss was about. Arrogant-World savior- Potter couldn't possibly have come back as good looking as everyone is claiming. I mean, look at his parents; he doesn't have the genes to ever be as handsome as I am. At the time, that's what I had foolishly thought.

Oh, how wrong I was.

Since I had locked myself in a compartment, I didn't see Potter coming through the Slytherin end of the train on his way to the bathroom. So the first time I actually did see him was when he stepped into the Great Hall.

If this was any other year and Potter had strutted into the Great hall like that, then my face would've had a look of disgust on it. But this time, my face had an amazed expression to it.

'It was all true!' I thought. When he came in, all innocent and god like, I momentarily stopped breathing. After a few seconds of a totally un-Draco like expression on my face, I reverted reluctantly back to the expression that shows just how devilishly handsome I am.

Throughout the rest of the dinner, I watched Harry's every move through the corner of my magnificent gray eyes. I just couldn't stop looking. While I was spying on Harry happily eating his treacle tart, I tried to ignore the rise of my heart beat, and the fluttering feeling I got when Harry started licking his spoon.

'Stop! This is a Potter were talking about here! You have been designed to hate his guts since day one!' After I finished thinking that, suddenly another voice, which sounded suspiciously like Granger, started talking:

'There's a fine line between love and hate, Draco. Admit it. You're in love with Potter, just like the rest of us.' The voice said.

'No! I will not admit it because it isn't true! Just because my hands are awfully clammy all of a sudden, and it feels like a clan of butterflies have decided to nest in my stomach. And I could easily get lost in the depth of his sparkling green eyes, and I don't want to smash his face in with my foot, but rather do something else to that beautiful face, that has the most beautiful eyes I have ever seen' I paused in disbelief.

'...Wait a minute…Did I really just think that? It's not true, I didn't just say anything. Wait a sec...Someone must have given me a love potion. Yes, that's it! I can't possibly be feeling this way unless a love potion was involved! I'm not going crazy! Woot!' I whooped excessively for the next minute in my head. Until that voice started talking again:

'Now, Draco, that is completely impossible. Tell me have you drunk anything at dinner yet, or on the train?'  
I remained silent, until I realized it was right. I hadn't had anything to drink.

'Damn' I thought.

'Once again, I am right. Now tell me how long have you been in love with him?' That dreaded voice started up again.

'I am not in love with Potter!'

'You are!'

'Not!'

'Are!'

'Not!'

'Are!'

'Not!' I paused. 'Oh my god, I'm going crazy, first I get all weird inside when I see Potter, now I'm arguing with a voice inside my head.'

'ARE!' That voice yelled.

Frustrated I yelled: "NOT!" back.

Only after did I realize that I had yelled it out loud. Everyone in the hall turned around and looked at me. Ashamed and embarrassed, I sat down. Only to realize that in my frustration I had stood up, in the middle of dinner, and yelled "NOT!"

I have officially gone loony.

For the rest of the week I avoided Potter. This turned out to be pretty hard, since a mob of people follow him at any time.  
When the whole boxer/picture/newspaper scandal happened I wasn't too pleased. Only when I am trying to deliberately trying to avoid Potter, everyone is talking about him.

Even though, I had vowed at the beginning of the week to avoid Potter and anything pertaining to him, I just had to buy one of those newspapers. Don't ask how and why but I did.

Turns out Witch Weekly have pretty decent magazines. I ordered a weekly subscription of it for a year.

What? Why are you looking at me like that? What, you never thought that someone as beautiful as me has to work to look this way? That it just comes naturally? Well, let me tell you, I have to work hard to accomplish this level of beauty.

And anyways, Witch Weekly had a good spell on keeping your skin clear, and keeping your hair color bright and fresh. Recently, my platinum blond hair has been graying slightly, and just hasn't been up to par to its usual condition. It's really been bothering me lately, and I'll be forever grateful of Witch Weekly for solving the hair problem that has been irking me for two weeks.

Anyway, I have officially ditched Pansy Parkinson as an acquaintance. She just would not shut up about Potter. After praising him, like she hasn't previously hated him for five years, for about two days, she finally resulted to sighing wistfully whenever she was in his presence.  
Eventually, I got so annoyed, I snapped at her, and told her to leave. She is now currently sitting over by Millicent Bulstrode. I'm so annoyed I don't even feel sorry for her.

Sigh, Potter just came into Potions. I guess I'll duck under the table, to avoid further interaction between him and me. Since I was under the table, I didn't notice the weird looks I got from everyone.

* * *

HARRY'S POV

The strangest and most disgusting thing happened today. I was walking to the dungeons for Potions, with my usual crowd of people following. I was trying to talk to Ron, while simultaneously trying to ignore the two girls who were walking by my side trying to flirt with me.  
The whole newspaper scandal has quieted down considerably, although I see some people with the newspaper tucked between their books. Now all people did was follow me around all day, whenever, wherever. I've even had some girls try to follow me up to my dorm.  
Actually, one time, this fifth year had followed me up to my dorm when I was going to sleep. And because I was so tired, I didn't hear her until I took my shirt off and she had gasped loudly; alerting me that I wasn't the only one in the room. Needless to say, I always check behind me before changing or entering my dorm.

Anyway, I had finally reached Potions and usually Ron, Hermione, and I just walk in, since Snape doesn't get there until everyone is there. Sometimes I think he only comes in late so he can dramatically walk through the door, with his robes billowing behind him, giving him the slightest resemblance to a bat.  
Ron had gone to the bathroom since we were five minutes early, and Hermione didn't have potions this year.

So I walked in like it was any other normal day. Oh, how naive I was. I had just walked in and was about to turn towards my desk, when I turned back. Frozen in the doorway, I stared in shock. He didn't notice.  
Standing there was Snape, jutting his hips in a circular motion, while singing a muggle song.

"I'm too sexy for my shirt, too sexy for my shirt. Too sexy it hurts." He sang in this scratchy falsetto voice. Snape was moving his hips in a sickening motion that made me dizzy. He started combing his fingers through his hair, pretending to rip his shirt, and pouting his mouth. He continued singing.

"I'm a model you know what I mean." Right then, he started walking between the aisles of desks, his hands on his hips, big nose in the air, walking a runway walk like nothing I've seen before…and not in a good way.

"And I do my little turn on the catwalk. Yeah on the catwalk on the catwalk yeah. I shake my little tush on the catwalk." Here he gave his "tush" a little shake before resuming his "catwalk."

Before, even though, I really didn't want to see this, I was too shocked to move. But that little thing he calls a dance move was the last straw, I vamoosed on out of there, leaving Snape and his scratchy singing behind me.

I ran into the bathroom, and puked my guts out until there was nothing left for me to upchuck. I didn't go to classes for the rest of the day, and even ate my dinner in the kitchen.

Even though I put as much distance between me and Snape, I couldn't get the image out of my head. I've been traumatized. And, to make it worse, that damn song has been stuck in my head for the past two days!


	6. Of singing and love potions

HARRY'S POV

I haven't told anyone about what I saw. I knew if I told Ron he would just start laughing, Hermione would give me a concerned and apologetic look, while secretly trying to not laugh. Ginny would have the same response as Ron. So, with those in mind, I decided to keep this encounter a secret. Plus I figured keeping this mum could make up for looking into Snape's pensieve two years ago. Even if Snape didn't know I even saw something this time.

So for the past week I've been trying to get that horrific scene out of my head with no luck. Last night I even had a nightmare about what I walked into that included Snape, that muggle song, Voldemort, and mice. Basically everything I hate in one setting.

That dream was worse than all the nightmares about the Department of Mysteries I got about two years. And that is really saying something.  
I think Ron and Hermione are becoming suspicious of my odd behavior. I don't dare a look at Snape anymore, and when Snape insults me at Potions, I just ignore him and stare at my potion. Usually when that happens I glare at Snape with as much hatred as I would glare at Voldemort and don't even bother to bite back the sarcastic retort that pops up. But since I haven't done that in four days, I think they know something is up.

About two days later, I had way more to think and worry about than Snape dancing in grotesque ways while singing to muggle songs. Earlier I was walking to Transfiguration when this girl I've never seen before comes up to me. She was attractive in a 'plastic' kind of way; she looked basically like a replica of Manhattan Barbie. She had blue eyes, blond hair with numerous highlights, and a heart shaped face. She had delicate features; a small pert nose, that was kind of upturned and small lips. She was shorter than me and had on a provocative outfit: heels and the shortest skirt I've ever seen. I wondered how she got through the halls without a teacher giving her detention. Quite honestly, I was attracted to her... If only I'd known what I had been getting into. Just goes to show how much more important personality is than hotness factor.

"Hello. You're Harry Potter, right?" She started mumbling:"My, you are scrumptious." I blushed. "Way hotter than in that muggle newspaper." Her voice went back to normal. "Oh, sorry. I'm Miranda Green." She started talking in this sultry voice. I wasn't turned off by her, actually I was even more interested, but I would become annoyed with her soon enough.

I started talking back in a slightly flirty manner that I did not know I even possessed. I took the hand she had stuck out in mine and kissed it.

"Miranda Green. It's a pleasure. Have I met you before? I'm sure I would remember a face like yours." I replied smoothly. I sounded like James Bond, a characteristic I quite liked.

"Oh no. I just transferred here from a small private school in London. Could you be my knight and shining armor, and show me around a little?" Miranda said flirtatiously.

I bowed deeply. "Harry Potter, at your service." She giggled. I grimaced. First of all, that giggle was high pitched, and had this sort of snort in the middle. I chose to ignore it. I offered my arm, she accepted, and we started walking.

"So where to, your highness?" I said. She giggled again. Damn, I thought I could avoid that.

"Anywhere you like." She said.

For half the day, I showed her most of Hogwarts, even some of the secret passages. The more time went by the more fun I had. She was smart, confident, and incredibly funny. She had toned down the flirting a little, so it was just like talking to one of my best friends.  
We were still walking with our arms linked, which I didn't mind much. And the thing I liked the most is she didn't seem to care that I'm the 'chosen one' Harry Potter. She hasn't asked me anything about my past adventures or the Department of Mysteries. Not one mention of Voldemort, I have not even seen her look at my scar.

She told me of this prank she had pulled on her older brother that involved flour, toothpaste, water, and chicken feathers. By the end, I was laughing so hard I was bent over and pounding my fist on my leg. After ten minutes, I finally stopped laughing. And for the next fifteen minutes I was hiccupping.

And then later, we both got stuck in a broom closet for six minutes. Until I realized I had my wand in my pocket and I could just unlock it magically. When we got out, Miranda said maybe I had showed the closet for other reasons than just showing her where she can get brooms. I couldn't help but blush at that. Damn, my olive complexion! Currently were at the kitchens, sharing a chocolate sundae.

"No way! 'Bohemian Rhapsody' is so much than better than, 'Don't stop Believing'!" She yelled. Since I lived with muggle relatives, and she was muggle born, we were talking about our favorite muggle bands.

She continued. "'Bohemian Rhapsody' has the most awesome lyrics! It doesn't make any sense! Can you really find a song as fun to sing as that one?"

I scoffed. "Uh, yeah! 'Don't Stop Believing'! Tell me you don't feel absolutely free a-and giddy when you sing the 'don't stop believing' part? It's awesome, that's what."

She scoffed. "Yeah, right. Nothing is as freeing and joyful than singing the "Galileo" part in 'Bohemian Rhapsody'!"

"Oh, yeah? Well how about this. We'll both sing each song and then we'll decide which song we liked singing the best." I yelled.

"Okay! But first we start with...'Don't Stop Believing'!" That surprised me, but I nodded. We both started singing from the beginning and I had to say that together we sang really well.

"Just a small town girl, living in a lonely world. She took the midnight train going anywhere." We howled at the top of our lungs, both nodding our heads in time with the song playing in our heads.

"A singer in a smoky room; a smell of wine and cheap perfume. For a smile they could share the night it goes on and on and on." By this point we were both out of our seats, standing up, dancing in place, bobbing our heads, and tapping our feet.

"Strangers waiting up and down the boulevard, their shadows searching in the night..." We continued dancing and singing as loud as we could.

We had grabbed our spoons and were using them as fake microphones.  
"...Hiding somewhere in the nniiiiiiiiiiiiiiggggggggght!" While singing that long note, both of us knowing the guitar solo was coming, we climbed on top of the table we were sitting at. When the guitar solo came we both did our air guitar. Might I say we sounded awesome? Then came the big part:

"DON'T STOP BELIEVING! HOLD TO THAT FEELING! STREETLIGHTS, PEOPLLLLLLLLLLLEEEEEEEEEEE!" We were both holding hands and swaying, spinning each other occasionally. "DON'T STOP BELIEVING! HOLD ON! STREETLIGHTS, PEOPLLLLLLEEEEEE! DON'T STOP BELIEVING! HOLD ONTO THAT FEELIIIIIIIIIINNNNGGGGGGG! DON'T STOP!" Still holding our spoons, we ended both breathing heavily. We let go each other hands, blushing all the while. Finally, Miranda talked:

"So, Bohemian Rhapsody?" I smiled and nodded. Both of still standing on the table, house elves gathered around us (we hadn't noticed), we started singing.

"Want to start the beginning?" I asked. Miranda smiled brightly and nodded.

"Is this the real life, is this just fantasy, caught in a landslide. No escape from reality, open your eyes look up the skies and see. I'm just a poor boy" I sang poor boy as an echo. "I need no sympathy." She sang with clear resolve, quite extraordinary.

I joined in. "Because I'm easy come easy go, little high little low. Any way the wind blows, doesn't really matter to meeeee...to-o meeeeee." We continued singing as loud, if not louder, as Don't Stop Believing, until we got to both our favorite parts. Of course we did the air guitar solo.

"I see a little silhouetto of a man. Scaramouch, Scaramouch, can you do the fandango! THUNDERBOLT AND LIGHTNING VERY, VERY FRIGHTENING ME!" Miranda took the higher voice, and I did the lower.

"GALILEO!" GALILEO!" "GALILEO!" "GALILEO!" "GALILEO FIGARO!"

"MAGNIFICO-O-O-O!"

"I'm just a poor boy, nobody loves me!" Miranda sang.

"HE'S JUST A POOR BOY FROM A POOR FAMILY! SWEAR TO HIS LIFE FROM THIS MONSTROSITY!" And so it continued until the end when we were both out of breath, and in the same position as before.

All of sudden, a ton of clapping could be heard, even some whooping. Looking around us we saw what could be all of Hogwarts house elves, and behind us, half of the school. Blushing bright red, both of us jumped off the table, I helped Miranda off. Miranda put her shoes back on, straightened her uniform, and I stood there. Both of us were waiting for the applause and whooping to end.

After about five more minutes, the noise finally ended. I took Miranda's hand, held it above us, and then we both bowed deeply. Still holding her hand, I dragged her out of there. Right before we reached the portrait, Miranda threw her spoon behind her the same time I did. Still dragging her, we reached the portrait, climbed through, and Miranda wiggled her fingers and smiled at the shocked crowd right before the portrait slammed shut.

* * *

Once outside and around the corner, Miranda and I started laughing like crazy. We couldn't stop. Miranda actually fell to the floor because she just couldn't stand upright. I did the same not much later. So both of us were rolling on the floor with laughter, though no sound came out of us except occasional gasps. That was the only thing we did for a couple of minutes. We would stop for a few seconds but we'd only have to glance at each other to start hysterically laughing again. Finally we managed to stand upright again, only occasionally chuckling.

"That was awesome! Their faces." Miranda said while shaking her head.

"Yeah. This will be all over school tomorrow, maybe even in some muggle newspaper soon enough. So, what do you want to do now?" I said with a grin.

"Why don't we go to the common room? I still haven't seen it yet." Miranda said.

I bowed low again. "Your wish is my command, your highness." I straightened up halfway and kissed her hand. She laughed and pushed me away playfully. Thank god, she didn't do her version of the giggle.

"So…I won, right?" I said, smiling.

"No, you didn't. Admit it. Bohemian Rhapsody was more fun to sing!"

"No, Don't Stop Believing was!"

"No!"

"Yes!"

"No!"

"Yes!"

"N-"She was cut off when I put my lips on hers. Obviously surprised, Miranda didn't respond for a moment, but came back with force. I deepened the kiss, and put my arms around her waist to pull her closer. She responded by placing her arms around my neck. What had started gentle and slow was now passionate and fast. We stood there kissing for who knows long, until we both came up for air. We both stared into each others eyes, both of us breathing heavily. Until Miranda murmured one thing: "Wow."

"Yeah, wow." I said, still slightly dazed.

"So…What does this mean?" Miranda said, looking down, and fiddling with my now loose tie.

"Well…I was wondering, even though I've only known you for a day. Would you go out with me?"

Miranda looked up quickly; her response was yanking my tie towards her, and right before our lips touched, murmured her answer: Yes.

We kissed for a while after, still in the corridor, until we decided to go to the common room. Walking with her hand in hand, I felt life couldn't get better. Until I realized that I had skipped all of my classes that day. 'And it was totally worth it.' I thought, smiling down at Miranda.

GINNY'S POV

The next morning, the school had a little bit of a shock. All was going good, everyone chatting happily, until Harry came in with...Miranda Green.  
She was all over school because of her acapella singing jam with Harry. And no one knew where the hell she came from! Honestly, she just appeared out of thin air. She doesn't even have a house yet!  
I had a free period, and one of my friends came up to me dragging me to the kitchens where Harry and this girl I'd never seen before were singing 'Don't Stop Believing.' They actually sung well together, although the volume that they sang at was a little deafening. What shocked me the most was how carefree Harry was right then. He was playing air guitar, for Christ's sake!

And what shocked all of us was the way he acted when they finished singing and had seen all of us. A year ago, he would've blushed like crazy and ran the hell out of there. But all he did was stand there until everyone shut up and bowed!

After that whole spectacle, I think the whole school's going to be even more obsessed with him. He just looked so confident and sure of himself. Confidence is magnetic and Harry is the perfect example of that right now.

Anyway, when Harry stepped in hand in hand with Miranda Green into the Great Hall the whole hall went silent. Many people had furious, jealous, hopeful, and disappointed looks. Most of the girls had the jealous and furious looks on their faces. I can't count how many glares Miranda received in a thirty second time period. The girls of Hogwarts were not happy, me included.  
Looking at their clasped hands, I wanted to throw an angry cat between their clasped hands. I wanted to tear that skank away from Harry, and tear at her pretty face. I wanted...My brown eyes narrowed as the culprits came this way. They reached us; Harry sitting across from me, and Miranda sitting next to him.

"Hey guys. This is my new girlfriend, Miranda Green. She's new to Hogwarts." Harry said. Despite being extremely furious at him, I couldn't help but sigh a little when he smiled ear to ear, exposing his gorgeous grin. Hermione next to me smiled politely, looking her up and down, obviously judging her at first glance. Ron briefly looked up from his chicken before doing a double take and staring at her for a moment before smiling tentatively. Neville smiled at Miranda with no judgment or suspicion. I wish I could do that. With that in mind, I forced my eyes to un-narrow and my face to be the friendly picture of what the Weasley's are famous for.

"Miranda, this is Hermione Granger, Ron Weasley, Neville Longbottom, and Ginny Weasley." Harry said. I smiled tightly when she turned her head toward us and smiled her perfect smile. God, they look like such a picture perfect couple. They look like they should belong in the muggle movies Hermione showed me this summer. Harry's bronzed skin matched exquisitely with Miranda's pale skin and their smiles were identical with happiness and superiority. Suddenly, a thought came to mind.

"Miranda, so when are you getting sorted?" I asked with fake courtesy. Harry looked surprised at the question like he had assumed that she was in Gryffindor. Miranda just smiled again.

"Right about now." She said. And almost as if she was a psychic, Dumbledore announced they had a sorting to do. Miranda stood up and walked away with her hips swaying in her pleated skirt with every step. 'This should be interesting,' I thought.

DRACO'S POV

'Damn that Miranda Green! She got that 'Don't Stop Believing' song stuck in my head, and now she's with H-Potter.' I thought at breakfast the next morning when I saw the happy couple walk in. Why do I care? I quietly questioned myself. Ignoring that inquiry (Malfoy's don't explore their feelings) I instead turned my concentration toward Potter and the swarms of jealous women around me. Many of the Slytherins around me were practically hyperventilating in hatred and resentment. It was rather pathetic to look at. 'I mean, you don't see me wanting to tear apart Green from limb to limb and grasping my spoon so hard that it bends backwards with no effort. You don't see me wanting to permanently sew Miranda's mouth closed so that I don't have to see that flawless smile aimed at Harry ever again. You don't see me wanting to see Harry dump her in the heat of rage, do you? You don't.' I thought with satisfaction until I looked down and saw that I had bended my fork backwards on accident while I had been glaring at Harry. Looking around, I carefully set down the fork and fixed it with my wand while carelessly running my hand through my hair. Nothing's happened here...

After watching Crabbe shove five whole pancakes into his face with fascination, I was dumbly shoving waffles into my mouth while watching Harry out of the corner of my eye. Suddenly, I saw Miranda rise and walk toward the podium where the Sorting Hat was sitting. 'Oh, she's getting sorted. That makes sense. Merlin, I hope she doesn't get sorted into Slytherin.' I thought. 'Please, Please, Please, I will do anything.' I looked over to Harry to see him smiling confidently. He obviously thinks she's going to be sorted in Gryffindor. Merlin, I hope he's right for once.

The whole school watched in suspense. As we watched, Miranda sat down with a smirk and once the hat was placed on her head, the smirk disappeared. 'I hope that doesn't mean what I think that means,' I thought. But it did.

Minutes later, the Sorting Hat shouted..."Slytherin!" Simultaneously, half the school moaned in agony, some even screaming, and the cheered in joy. I, of course, screamed.

**Harry's POV**:

"What?" I yelled as the whole school went into chaos. How could she be sorted into Slytherin? My girlfriend? How? What? This isn't possible. Re-sort! I looked around me as I tried to process what happened. Two girls had started throwing food at each other and two Hufflepuffs were literally fighting, ripping each others hair and slapping. But all that didn't even amount to what the Slytherin table looked like. Malfoy was screaming with his hands over his ears. The girls were throwing everything they could onto each other and four boys were shouting and looking like they were on the brink of a full on fight. It seems like Miranda's sorting was the catalyst for everyone's bottled emotions. Speaking of her, Miranda was sitting on the stool with a shocked expression. I probably hadn't given her the best impression of Slytherin.

Suddenly, a piece of pie that was meant to land on a Slytherin landed on a Gryffindor. And that's when it really started. Breakfast was flying everywhere. People were ducking under the tables from the assault and others just joined in. The four boys who were arguing started a fist fight. And I just sat in the middle of it all. Somehow the food didn't seem to be hitting me at all. It seemed like everyone was avoiding throwing all the assorted foods at me. Until someone didn't. A blob of tea and scone hit the back of my head and I jolted up.

I realised at that moment that it didn't matter if she was a Slytherin or not. Sirius' whole family was from Slytherin and he turned out better than could be expected. There are some really cruel people that have emerged from that house but that doesn't mean that Miranda is inherently evil or a Death Eater just for belonging to that house. It's not like a day sleeping in the same dorm as Slytherins is going to make her evil.

Merlin, I can't believe how irrational I was being. I know what I'm going to do now! I got up from my seat and reached Miranda. She looked up with such a confused and vulnerable look that I caved immediately. I wrapped her in my arms for a moment before running out of the Great Hall with Miranda next to me.

Once we were out of the war zone, we kept running. Laughing and running past each other before we collapsed next to the broom cupboard we got locked in. After a while of catching our breath, a companionable silence ensued. Then Miranda started kissing me. In a frenzy, we opened the door to the cupboard and spilled in. We got locked in again but this time we were too busy to care.

**Later in that day, Draco's POV: **

Oh shit, I don't think I've ever been more disgusted in someone than I am right now. Miranda and Harry just arrived 30 minutes late to class with their clothes rumpled and huge smiles on their faces. I think even Crabbe knows what they've just been doing. Looking around with disgust, it's kind of funny that half the class looks like they want to punch someone.

Some people were stupid enough to think that Harry would dump her just because she's a Slytherin now. Please, Harry is too Gryffindor for something so callous and rude. He might not have been dating her for more than half a day but Harry would have some stupid reasoning for not dumping her like that she won't become evil just by sharing dorms with Slytherins.

In Potions, we're making the amortentia potion which smells like Old Spice, chocolate frogs, and feathers. The usual stuff. I need to concentrate, this is a rather difficult potion to make and I really can't be bothered with Potter while I do make it.

_'Peel the shell of 6 1/5 of a snail._' I start to do that. Usually this step takes quite a while, so to pass time I hum a song.

"Just a small town girl living in a lonely world." Under my breathe, I hummed, bobbing my head slightly, and tapping my foot rhythmically.

"She took the midnight train going anywhere." Under my breathe, I sang this time.

"Just a city boy born and raised in south Detroit. He took the midnight train going anywhere." I sang but noticed someone has started singing along. I heard more singing and turned to my left to hear Crabbe singing the next line:

"A singer in a smoky room," I joined in."A smell of wine and cheap perfume." We were still singing softly, but some more people joined in. Pretty soon the Slytherin section was singing softly in unison. Since the dungeon was silent before, the Gryffindors and Miranda, who was partners with Potter, could hear us. To my surprise, they started singing along too. Not long after the whole class was singing. It was quite fun, too. Who knew?

The singing wasn't as energetic as Miranda's and Potter's singing, but was still quite loud. All of us had neglected our potions in favor of singing and swaying. Snape had left to attend to something, so nobody could stop us.

When the "Don't stop believing" part came up, everyone say louder, and more energetically. I started bobbing my marvelous head, and tapping my foot like before. When the song finished, the whole class went back to their potions, until we heard soft singing coming from the Gryffindor section.

"Is this the real life, is this just fantasy?" I recognized it as Miranda's. "Caught in a landslide no escape from reality." Potter joined in and the rest of us followed. "Open your eyes look up to the skies and see." We sang the whole song in complete peace. There seemed to be an unspoken agreement to keep this strange event a secret.

Already distracted, I looked over to the Gryffindor section and saw Miranda and Potter sitting next to each other. Potter's hand had strangely disappeared; as had Miranda's. Leaning over, I tried to look under the table, but I couldn't. So I leaned over even more until I was coincidentally really close to Goyle. I still couldn't see so I bent over a little.

When I did that, five things happened all at once.

One: I kneed Goyle in the stomach.

Two: Goyle, startled, hit himself over the head with his potions club.

Third: Crabbe, who was walking by, tripped over Goyle who was bent over from hitting himself on the forehead.

Fourth: Crabbe, while falling, grabbed me and dragged me down to the floor.

Fifth: I tried to grab onto the sides of my cauldron while I was falling. Thus spilling the unfinished amortentia on all three of us.

So, all three of us, were lying on the floor; I was on top of Crabbe, and Goyle partially on both of us. All of us covered in white/silver love potion. I grunted and got off Crabbe. It took me a few moments because Crabbe had tangled himself between me and Goyle.

Quickly, I evanescoed the potion off me, but not before I got a small amount of the amortentia in my mouth.

Amortentia is a strong love potion that doesn't make you fall in love with someone but creates a false and intense infatuation. And since we hadn't put in the ingredient that distinguished who the love potion was for; the person would 'fall in love' with the first thing they saw.

Crabbe and Goyle were still covered in the potion, so they had swallowed more of the potion than I did.

Suddenly, I felt a dreamy expression come across my face. I closed my eyes, and opened them, my gaze falling on Harry Potter.

'Wow. He's beautiful,' was my only thought before I irrevocably became infatuated with Harry Potter.

**HARRY'S POV:**

Today has been a great day. I thought with a cheeky grin toward Miranda. Right now I'm at potions, where something a little strange is brewing. The whole class had finished singing "Bohemian Rhapsody," (don't ask) and the whole room was silent for a couple moments, until a loud crash came from the Slytherin section.

I looked over and saw Malfoy, Crabbe and Goyle in a little bit of a pickle. Malfoy was lying on top of Crabbe; his leg was kind of twisted around Goyle. Goyle looked like he had passed out.

And the funniest part was they were all covered in the amortentia potion. I started laughing and I gradually got louder. I stopped when I realized that they were covered in the amortentia potion. Amortentia meaning the most powerful love potion ever invented. I stared in horror as I vaguely heard Snape's voice in my head.

_"If someone who hasn't finished or completed the potion correctly consumed the potion, then they will become infatuated with the first thing they see."_

I swore in my head. Obviously they would've swallowed some as it was covering their face.

'Let's just hope they didn't,' I thought. Even though I didn't particularly like them, I did not want to see them make a fool of themselves.

Unfortunately, after that thought passed my head, I saw Malfoy get off of them, and banish the potion off himself.

Goyle was still passed out, and Crabbe was staring at a quill with a vacant expression on his face. Malfoy was standing up, now clean, and looked like he was tasting something that was in his mouth; he didn't look like he was enjoying it.

Suddenly, Malfoy's eyes became vacant and he turned pale. Crabbe was now making out with the quill; not a pretty sight.

Malfoy looked straight at me, and started walking towards me. Scared, and a little frightened, I took a couple steps backward; heading for the door. He continued walking towards me, then started talking in a dreamy voice.

"Harry, you're so smart and beautiful. Everything I've ever said before was wrong. You're incredible." He mumbled some more stuff while I was inching toward the door. Malfoy had this weird expression on face that made me thoroughly scared for my safety. I was a little shocked so I hadn't moved in a while, which I regretted because when Malfoy got close enough he threw himself at me. I fell over with Malfoy grabbing onto my legs and pulling me back. I struggled for a while until I sent a tickling hex over my shoulder, effectively distracting him for a moment; even if I had missed. I got up hurriedly and stumbled through the door. I heard him yelling and catching up to me. I ran faster.

"Wait! Harry, I love you! Not Miranda, she doesn't love you! I, Draco Malfoy, love you more than you like treacle tart! Why are you running? You should be running into my arms!" Mortified, I ran around the corner. He followed, and unfortunately caught up to me. He was right behind me now, and with a surprising burst of energy, he ran in front of me and stopped, blocking my path.

"Harry." He huffed, I guess he isn't as in shape as he thinks.

"You're my light, my earth, and sun. I belong with you. I belong to have those luscious lips on my own. And whatever I've ever said to contradict that fact; I was wrong. I realize it today. I love you. You're so smart, beautiful, cocky, arrogant, and full of yourself, and I love you for it. I love you, Harry." He said that whole speech with a dreamy smile on his face. What I didn't know then was our whole potions class was watching from behind us.

I felt horrified; my worst nightmare has come true. 'It's all from the potion.' I thought. Mentally, I breathed a sigh of relief. It's not real, I reminded myself.

"Well, that's all fine and great, Malfoy. But I'm with Miranda right now, so I don't think we can do anything about that. And I'm gonna apologize beforehand about what I'm about do. I'm sorry." I stunned him before he can send me a confused glance. Running the hell away, I put as much distance between Malfoy and I.


	7. Hell hath no fury like a woman scorned?

Hell Hath No Fury Like A Woman Scorned?

DRACO'S POV

I can't believe I did that. I can't believe that happened to me. I, Draco Malfoy, the most handsome man I know, declared his love for Harry Potter, his arch enemy since day one, in the middle of potions. I, Draco Malfoy, was so clumsy that I had spilled the most powerful love potion all over myself, and even after I vanished all of it, I still managed to consume some of it. I, Draco Malfoy, had, and I quote, said "you are my light, my earth, and sun" to Harry Potter. I, Draco Malfoy, had managed to get stunned by Harry Potter in a corridor, and stayed in that condition for an hour, during which people had stepped all over me. I- You know what? I'll shut up now. There's no use wallowing in more self-agony than I already am. But, I digress.  
Why am I always so unfortunate?

Why? Yeah, that's right! I'm asking _you_, the Man, acting all high and mighty controlling the whole world. Making my life misery, and basking in your own personal cocoon of schadenfreude. Well, guess what? Jack Black was wrong. He was all "oh, just give up cause the Man is going to bring you down!" Well, I am not going to give up! I'm going to stick it to the Man...

Please forgive for that temporary moment of insanity. I saw the School of Rock when I was over at Crabbe's house during the summer. We had found it under a bunch of boxes, so we watched it on the DVD player, and the TV we also found. It was quite delightful, really. Not enough killing and misery, but enough badassness to keep me satisfied.

Sometimes, I wish I could be a muggle; life is so much simpler for them, no "the Man" controlling their every move. Sigh. I'm just going to crawl into the deep confines of my no doubt gorgeous mind, and drown in my self-pity and loathing.

* * *

HARRY'S POV

Miranda is annoying me like hell. It's been two weeks, and already she's become a bloody lunatic. Why do I always have the worst luck when it comes to relationships? I'm currently hiding in the Room of Requirement, a place I didn't show her on the tour the day I met her.

The day after we started going out, everything was going very well. Until that whole Malfoy-love-potion thing happened and after her first night in the Slytherin dorms. After that, Miranda seemed to notice all the people that stare and follow me daily. In other words, she became incredibly jealous, temperamental, and possessive. I've never liked being controlled, especially by girls, so I'm not too happy about it. Even if that does sound incredibly sexist. I'm starting to think that Slytherin really has made her evil or warped her logic a little...

She started to glare at any girl that passed me or came too close for her liking. She has also personally attached herself to my arm. Also she snogs me if any of my fan clubs were near. Not that I mind that much about that part.

In one day, she has yelled at me four times for talking to other people who are not her. And in return to her bizarre and frankly annoying behavior I have tried to avoid her yesterday. This proved to be pretty hard because she is in all of my classes. I eventually decided to ditch my classes when I had to run into Moaning Myrtle's bathroom to avoid her once. If her frustrated scream was anything to go by, she doesn't seem too pleased with me.

Earlier today, the weekend, she did a couple of things to rival anything I've ever seen. I'm still trying to figure out if she was for real or fake crying.

FLASHBACK

I groaned when I felt Ron shaking me awake. I tried to slapping his hand, but ended up slapping empty air. Ron shook me more rigorously; I groaned even more and buried my head in my pillow. Finally I felt Ron's hand leave my shoulder, and the shaking ended. I sighed in satisfaction and snuggled into a more comfortable position. I suddenly shrieked when a massive amount of water poured onto me. I looked up to see Ron standing over me, wand held out, with a sheepish grin hovering over his mouth.

He shrugged. "Sorry. It was the only way you were going to wake up." I moaned and ignored him for a minute, before reluctantly getting out of my four poster bed. I took off my shirt, looked to my left, and saw Dean staring at me. I turned over to him, and he turned away, looking quite ashamed. Blushing a little, I grabbed a green shirt from my drawer, since it was the weekend, and pulled it over my head. I pulled on a pair of jeans, and tried to flatten my hair. Didn't work.

Still tired, I stumbled down the stairs and out of the common room. I waved back to a ton of people, and tried to shake off the girls hanging off my arms. When that didn't work, I chatted with them, and shared some charming stories. I entered the Great Hall with my crowd of admirers following after. Miranda looked up when I came in; laughing at something the girl to my right had said. When I sat down, some of the people went to their own seats, but three followed me and sat down there. One of them was a tall blond named Alicia, the second was a green eyed-brunette named Skye, and the third dark blue eyed-redhead named Leslie. All of them were flirting with me and I responded appropriately. I wrapped my arm around Miranda, and gave them a look. Apparently I didn't need to bother because Miranda glared at them fiercely. They left reluctantly, giggling the whole time.

Miranda glared at me briefly but looked over my shoulder. Then she grabbed my face to hers and kissed me rather passionately. I responded quickly and pulled her closer, although in my mind I was puzzled to why she engaged me in this joyful yet random PDA. I got my answer when we broke away a couple of minutes later, she glanced over my shoulder. I followed her gaze and saw the three girls with shocked looks on their faces.

I suddenly understood; Miranda was jealous. She had just snogged me in the middle breakfast to, basically, mark her territory. Now that I thought about it, the whole reason was pretty obvious. And I felt a little offended.

I got really irritated all of sudden. Sure, I was her boyfriend, but she didn't get the right to control me. And she definitely didn't get to after just three days. I was so frustrated that I snapped at her. She was still glaring at the Alicia, Skye, and Leslie.

I turned to her. "What was that?" I snapped.

She shrugged and looked up at me with an innocent expression. "What was what?" She peered up at me, fluttering her eyelashes.

"That massive amount of PDA at the breakfast table. And the glaring at Leslie, Alicia, and Skye over my shoulder?" I knew the answer but I wanted to hear her say it.

She glared when I mentioned their names. "Oh, so the skanks have names?" She sneered.

I looked at her incredulously. "Yes they do. Now, stop acting like this! I don't know what's up with you but stop!" I softened my voice, and lifted her chin with my finger. "If you're afraid that I'm going to leave you for them. Then you don't have to worry about it. I like you. Not them. And they may try to flirt with me or bend down so low that I can see their ovaries." She glared at me.

I held up my hands in defense. "Sorry. But that doesn't mean I'm going to care. "She glanced up at me and sighed.  
"Okay. I'll try to stop. I don't even really know what I was doing. Forgive me?" She peered up at me hopefully.

I nodded and she kissed me thankfully. I pulled away rather quickly for some unknown reason. Miranda looked a little disappointed and looked down before resuming her breakfast.

I did the same, and we put that argument behind us. Only when we left the Great Hall did Miranda start acting weirdly again. While we were walking she was clinging to my arm, and squeezing so hard I was sure my arm was going to become numb soon. Glaring at everyone who walked past, I was becoming really irritated by her behavior. I was even starting to miss my usual posy of giggling girls. But most of them had scurried away from Miranda's expression. I decided to not say anything this time; hoping it would blow over soon.

"Hey, Miranda? I'm going to go to my dorm to get my Transfiguration homework." I said, making up a reason to get away from her and her homicidal glares.

Her head snapped up, like she was coming back from a daze. "Huh? Oh, sure. You want me to come with?" She asked, kind of aggressively.

I shook my head quickly. "No. That's okay. I'm sure you've got other things to do." I said hastily.

She eyed me suspiciously for a minute, but reluctantly nodded and kissed my cheek. As I watched her walk away I sighed tiredly. I started to the library to research for my Charms paper. As I was walking there I noticed Katie Bell talking to Lavender Brown. I needed to talk to her about quidditch; her flying has been a little off due to her damaged broom. So I was going to offer to buy her a new broom, or at least ask McGonagall if she could get her a new one.

"Hey, Katie!" I yelled. She turned around and smiled when she saw me. A slightly lusty smile, someone might have observed, but I didn't notice.

"Hey, Harry. Wh-What's up?" She turned red

"Oh. I noticed that your flying was a little off. I thought it was because of your slightly broken broom. So I was wondering if I could buy you a new one. You know, for the team?" I asked earnestly.

She looked disbelieving. "Oh. Um..Are-Are you sure? I mean, you don't have to. I can t-totally pay for it myself." Katie said.

"No. It's my pleasure." I smiled. I didn't hear her sharp intake of breath.

"Oh. Okay. Thanks." She smiled dazedly, and reached up to kiss me on the cheek. When all of a sudden, Miranda appeared out of nowhere and pushed Katie away from me.

Miranda glared at Katie. "What do you think you're doing? Trying to steal my boyfriend? Who do you think you are?"

"What are you talking about?" Katie said incredulously. Miranda was standing in front of me, so I couldn't see her face, but I can imagine that she looked ready to kill.

"Oh, you know what I'm talking about. Stalking after my boyfriend, blushing, and giggling when he smiled at you. Then almost kissing his cheek in a totally flirty way. Now do you know?" Miranda's voice was now shaking with fury. Katie looked ready to explode. And she did.

"What? So you're all innocent, Green? I saw you flirting with Amos Diggory in the library yesterday. And there was plenty of touching, kisses on the cheek, and the forehead, etc. So don't be acting all 'jealous girlfriend' because Harry has done nothing wrong, you have!"

Miranda scoffed and snapped back a remark. "Oh. That is a lie! I was not at the library yesterday. You know what? Don't turn this on me. This is about you and your skanky behavior around my boyfriend."

Katie glared. "How _dare _you call me that? You're no better than I am, and I haven't even done anything! If anyone is a skank, it's you!" Miranda broke her hold of me, and attacked Katie; flying through the air to tackle her to the ground. I shook myself out of my daze, and quickly grabbed Miranda by the back of the shirt; lifting her up effortlessly. She struggled in my grip, kicking and trying to break free. I quickly put my arm under her waist, and the other under her legs, and threw her over my shoulder.

"Potter, let me go!" I decided against my better judgment to let her go, and quickly, but carefully placed her onto the ground. Once on the firm ground, Miranda seemed to forget about Katie, and turned her glare onto me. Katie was standing off to the side with her arms folded, frowning and glaring deeply.

"So, Potter, when were you planning to tell me about your little love affair with little miss Bell?" She sneered, and glared; not the best combination.

I looked at her like she was crazy. Which I was kind of convinced she was. "What are you talking about? I'm not having an affair with Katie! I'm not having an affair with anyone! Why the hell would you think that?"

"Well maybe the fact that you were like rubbing yourself all over her, smiling, and laughing. The fact that she was totally flirting with you and you were totally responding!"

"What are you talking about? You're delusional!" I threw up my hands in frustration.

"Don't deny it, Harry! What does she have that I don't? Huh? Does she have longer legs? Bigger boobs? Prettier eyes? Smaller waist? Is she funnier? What does she have that I don't? I wanna hear you say it!" She screeched.

"What the hell, Miranda? I am not having an affair with Katie Bell! Jesus! Are you bipolar? Do you have multiple personality disorder? What happened to you?" I started to walk away, when I heard sobbing from behind me. I turned around quickly and saw Miranda with her hands over her face, sobbing into them. I hesitantly walked over to her and stood over her for a moment; trying to think of what I should do. After a few minutes of her sobbing I hesitantly put my arms around her. She turned around in my arms and sobbed on my shoulder. I let her stay there for a while, rubbing her back, and whispering comforting things in her ear. Finally she quieted down and peered up at me cautiously. I stared at her and thought about what just happened. Obviously if she acted like this more often than I don't know if I could stay with her. With that in mind, I started talking.

"Look Miranda, I'm not having an affair with Katie, or with anyone else. You have to believe me on that."

She nodded, and quickly asked me to forgive her, again. I consented and she kissed me quickly. I had a strange feeling of déjà vu when she did that.

The whole rest of the day, things went back to normal. Miranda started acting like herself again, with a couple of random make-out sessions she had started mixed in between. I was slightly suspicious about that but I didn't say anything. Anyway, Ron and Hermione finally got their act together and started going out. Malfoy had stopped ignoring me and had continued to glare at me. All was well in the world again. Unfortunately, that's easier said than done.

It had happened around dinner time, when I was walking to the Great Hall, and Malfoy walked up to me. We hadn't had one of our weekly spats since last year, so I was eager to regain another piece of normality.

"Hey, Potter! How does it feel to be the second most handsome guy in school?" Malfoy shouted before standing in front of me.  
"You mean, after Dumbledore? Yeah, I mean, second is always better than your status." I smiled charmingly yet sarcastically, to annoy him.  
He glared. "And what is that?"  
"199th." I laughed at my witty response.  
"Ha-bloody-ha ha. Looks like Potter's gotten even more conceited."  
I smiled. "I could say the same for you." I laughed, but stopped suddenly when I heard someone yell my name. I turned around and saw Miranda running towards me with a glare on her face. I smiled wearily. I had a bad feeling about this.

"What is this?" She yelled loudly.

"What? I was just insulting Malfoy here." I said wearily. I had a really bad feeling now.

"Oh? Is that what you were doing? Well, it looked like you were flirting with him!" She said harshly.

I felt astounded. How dare she accuse me of flirting with _Malfoy_? "Of course I wasn't! Wanna know why? One: I'm not gay, and two, it's Malfoy! Never, ever, ever, ever, will you see me flirting with him!" I pointed at him as I said it.

"Oh, really? Well, how am I supposed to believe that when you were so obviously flirting with that Bell tramp!"

"I thought we got over this! I was not flirting with her!"

"You think you're so cool, that you can do anything you want and get away with it! You think you're Hogwarts' gift from god! Well guess what? You're not!"

"Well compared to your massive low-self esteem, it might look like I think I'm "Hogwarts' gift to god." I mocked her by making air quotes with my fingers. Right now I didn't really care how much I hurt her.

She scoffed disbelievingly. "Well if you think I'm so self conscious then maybe you should skip on back to your new boyfriend 'Malfoy!'"

"Maybe I will! I'd rather be with my worst enemy, than with someone like you!" She stared at me for a second before yelling.

"We are done, Potter! Done!" She stared at me for a while before bursting into tears, and running down the hallway, her hands covering her face.

I stood stunned for who knows how long, until I noticed the massive crowd of people gathered around me. They all stood there, staring at me, until I yelled at them.

"What are you looking at?" I shouted, then walked quickly into the Great Hall, quite ready to drown my sorrows into my favorite treacle tart.

* * *

I wasn't too heartbroken about the break-up because of how long the relationship actually was. Sure, rejection and being dumped on my ass for the first time hurt, but I'm not about to go cry myself a river. Leave that to Justin Timberlake. Still it didn't take long until I was completely over Miranda Green. I was so over her, that I didn't even realize her absence until Potions where I had her as a partner. According to McGonagall, Miranda had transferred back to her old school. I was a little surprised to hear about that. Miranda didn't seem like the kind of person who moved away after a breakup. But then again, I never really knew her.

It had been a week since Miranda left and our breakup and since I was once again single, I've had a lot more attention than before. Not that I really minded; most of the time I didn't even notice. The only thing that really irks me is when people stare at me for too long, like ten minutes of staring. It gets really uncomfortable for me. Unfortunately, I've been stared at constantly in the past week, and I'm getting really irritated, but it's not like I could tell the whole school to stop.

My next embarrassing moment happened on Sunday, which prompted a lot more staring than I'm accustomed to.

GINNY'S POV

We thought that Harry hadn't been getting over Miranda as fast as we thought he would. So we decided to have a little fun with him. All of us had planned it beforehand so he wouldn't be able to weasel his way out of it.

We were going to play...truth or dare. Yeah, I know. So, dramatic. But Harry has always hated that game since he was thirteen and an incident he likes to call "Naughty Petunia" happened. The only thing I know is that Dudley, Petunia, a corset, a whip, and a pair of Petunia's knickers was involved. Not a pleasant sight.

Since Harry has a lot of irrational fears, we made sure that he couldn't run out when we suggested playing.

Our plan started after dinner, in the common room when it was particularly empty. We (Neville, me, Hermione, Ron, Harry, Seamus, and Dean) were all around the common room doing our homework when Ron said the line we had practiced from before.

"I'm bored. Let's play a game." Everyone looked up from their textbooks and some nodded. I started talking next.

"What do you suggest?Hm...How 'bout...T-T-Truth or Dare?" I stumbled over my words again, and blushed a deep red.

Harry's head snapped up and he shook his head violently. "No no no no no no no no no no no. I am not playing that game. No no no no no no." He shook his beautiful head even more.

"C'mon Harry, one game. Just one then straight back to our homework. I promise. Please?" Hermione begged.

Harry looked like he was considering it and slowly nodded. We cheered and gathered in a circle around the middle of the common room. Getting ourselves comfortable, I looked over at Harry's face, and unconsciously sighed dreamily, even if his face had a sour expression placed on it.

Hermione clapped her hands together and talked. "Okay. Who wants to start first? Ron?" Half of that sentence she said eagerly and the other half spooky. Or something like that, you can't really tell with Hermione.

Ron nodded. "So, truth or dare, Ron?" Hermione asked.

"Dare." Ron said robotically. Mentally, I shook my head. Ron really is bad at acting. Harry still looked slightly grumpy and mad at us for making him do this. But frankly we didn't care.

"Okay...I dare you to kiss me." Hermione also said robotically. They were really bad at this.

Ron smiled appreciatively, this seemed to be the only thing he could do naturally. They kissed quickly and I said my part of the diabolical plan.

"Okay. Ron, who's next?" I said, in a voice that I hoped was convincing.

"Harry." Ron said in a monotone. I shook my head. 'Oh god.' I thought.

"Okay, Harry, truth or dare?" I asked in a mysterious voice. Harry turned his head and looked at me. I once again was blown away from the beauty his face contained. But what threw me off was the look in his eyes. He looked like he was seeing me for the first time. I couldn't help but feel that was a good thing.

"Dare." He said with determination written all over his glorious face. He seemed to have gotten over his irrational fear of truth or dare.

I smiled slightly. "I dare you to go to breakfast tomorrow in your pajamas, you can't change what you normally wear, and sing the 'Do ya think I'm sexy?' by Rod Stewart." I chuckled evilly under my breath.

Harry looked like he was going to say something but closed his mouth and said: "You're on."


	8. Of pajamas, dancing, and dares

The next morning, Harry woke up feeling determined, but slightly dreading his upcoming performance at breakfast. Since he was wearing what he was going to wear to breakfast, he got up from his bed, trying to ignore Dean's obvious staring.

He was very disgruntled, and wasn't even in the slightest looking forward to his "dare." And not just because of his sleepwear, but because he has to sing possibly the most inappropriate song for school he'd ever heard. Also the dancing, fully loaded with hip thrusts, and jazz fingers was something he wasn't too keen to present. He was about to be completely humiliated. And he yet he couldn't help but feel a certain thrill that is always associated with breaking the rules.

Before he left the dorm room, he took a deep breath and held the stereo that contained the music tighter in his hand. Before he lost his wits, he quickly took another breath and stepped out of the door.

When he walked down the stairs, all of the common room turned silent and gaped. Harry didn't notice, or was ignoring it, because he was too lost in his thoughts. But it's not like would've noticed if he wasn't.

He walked a swagger, smooth but quick, through the hallways; leaving behind stunned and daydreaming students and teachers behind him. Slowly, the people came of their dream-like state and followed Harry eagerly. Soon the massive crowd with Harry in the front reached the Great Hall where most of the others were assembled.

Quickly the throng that had followed their "leader" stood at the entrance; eager for the undoubtedly joyful entertainment that was sure to come.

Like clockwork, the music started and many gasped in familiarity.

GINNY'S POV

All of us were greatly excited for Harry's performance this morning. So excited we arrived at breakfast an hour early. Ginny and I wanted to grab the best seats, so we had the best view of Harry in what he sleeps in. But we didn't mention that to the others.

We were all about to sit down in the middle of the Gryffindor table, when I spotted a familiar head of blond hair. For a moment I thought I was hallucinating but when I looked a second time she was still there. I still wasn't sure if I was imagining it so I asked Ginny.

"Hey, Hermione? Is that who I think it is?" I asked slowly.

Hermione looked over to where I was pointing and gasped.

"I think it is!" Hermione said horrified.

I moaned. "Miranda Green." Both of us said at the same time.

Unfortunately before any of us could say any more, from the entrance of the Great Hall a bang sounded. Simultaneously, we groaned in our heads, but all thoughts left our minds when Harry stepped into the room.

Harry was dressed in pajama bottoms slung way too low on hips for anyone not to have lusty thoughts about him. The bottoms had snitches all over them, which gave them a totally geeky look. But somehow that geek factor only made Harry look that much better. He wasn't wearing a shirt, making everyone's cheeks burn bright red. His abs was completely built and luscious. His shoulders were broad and his arms were strong and built. He was wearing no shoes or socks, and his hair was more messed up than normal. He looked especially grumpy which made his lips pout a little, and make us all swoon that much more.

McGonagall was blushing like the rest of us; Flitwick's mouth was gaping open and even Snape's mouth looked a little open. Draco had a dreamy expression on his face, as did countless others. But most of all, everyone was blushing. As I was thinking lusty and pervy thoughts about Harry, I didn't notice him start the music and start sing-talking in a promiscuous and seductive voice.

"Sugar....Sugar....hmmm" He laughed quietly, and the whole hall let out a dreamy sigh. I cast a sonorus charm on him, so now his deep voice was projected around the hall.

"She sits alone waiting for suggestions. He's so nervous avoiding all her questions. His lips are dry, her heart is gently pounding." He started walking down the aisles dancing a little and moving. But when he sang the last line came on, he shook his mimed his "pounding heart" a little, and one girl actually fainted into her oatmeal. The people around her were too preoccupied to notice.

"IF YOU WANT MY BODY AND YA THINK I'M SEXY. COME ON, SUGAR, LET ME KNOW. IF YOU REALLY NEED ME JUST REACH OUT AND TOUCH ME. COME ON HONEY TELL ME SO." He shook his hips while he was semi-dancing. And I visibly melted.

He ran to the front of the hall and danced his gorgeous heart out. Moving his hips and basically making all the girls hot all over. We all watched his muscles ripple as he did Shakira-like moves with his abs. He ran between the aisles, shaking his hips, wiggling his butt, and doing other things that made me think very dirty thoughts about him. At this moment I was glad Ron was not a legilimens, or else I would be in big trouble. And by the look on his face, he was probably thinking the same thing.

I tore my gaze from my extremely hot best friend, and looked over at Miranda. She was drooling and looking extremely regretful. Ugh.

I stopped thinking completely when I heard Harry's singing again.

"IF YOU WANT MY BODY AND YA THINK I'M SEXY. COME ON, HONEY, TELL ME SO. IF YOU REALLY NEED ME JUST REACH AND TOUCH ME. COME ON, SUGAR, LET ME KNOW.

He sung the chorus while moving his hips from side to side. His pajamas had gotten lower, so you could see the top of his boxers, and some other stuff. Harry was getting so into the song, that when he got to the entrance of the great hall where a ton of people were still standing. He grabbed the nearest girl, spinned her, and started dancing salsa style. She looked a little stunned for a minute, but she quickly got back to her senses and started grinding against Harry.

Everyone's dreamy gaze turned into a glare as we watched Harry, shirtless, dance against some random girl he had grabbed. My only thought for the next fifty seconds was 'I wish I was that girl.'

Finally he let her go, and the expressions changed back to dreamy. He sung the last line....

"TELL ME SO, BABY." His voice vibrated through the whole hall. All the teachers and students were silent...and then it sounded like something exploded.

The cheers were so loud that I was afraid the windows would burst. I, of course, was cheering along, and so was everyone else. I even looked over at the slytherin table, and even they were cheering.

Harry smiled shyly, and blushed a dull red. He bowed low, and curtsied a little at the end. After ten minutes of cheering, Harry smiled slightly and sat next to me at the Gryffindor table. I kind of hyperventilated a little because Harry still wasn't wearing a shirt, and there was a thin sheet of sweat on his chest. After two minutes, I managed to calm down, and slow my heartbeat. Every single head was looking at Harry who was finding a hole in the ceiling quite interesting.

After minutes of staring and silence, Dumbledore started talking. "Thank you, Harry, for that delightful song. I've always had a liking for Rod Stewart. Anyway, I have an annoucement to make. The current Head Boy and Girl have decided that the school deserves to have a little break. So, this year there will be a Christmas Ball. Formal wear is required, and a date is advisable. Third years and older are allowed to attend and the ball is from 9-11pm. Now, I am sure you are all hungry to eat, so dine!" He stopped talking and clapped his hands. Food appeared but for once nobody cared. Everyone was silent and staring at Harry, who was still looking at the crack in the ceiling. He still wasn't wearing his shirt, but its not like anyone minded.

Finally Harry noticed the silence and looked around suspiciously. 'Oh no' he mouthed when he noticed everyone looking at him like he was a piece of meat.

He got up quickly, and exited from the entrance....Almost everyone running after him.


	9. Of mobs, broom closets, and Mrs Norris

HARRY'S POV

I ran out of the Great Hall and into the hallway. A massive crowd of girls, and guys following my every step. Since a whole crowd of people were stalking and running after me, my only response was to run the hell away from them. With my pajamas still on I ran down the hall, a throng of people yelling and running after me.

"Harry, come with me to the ball!" Many girls shouted at different intervals. Panicking I continued to run, hoping I could shake them off after a while. It didn't work.

"Harry, I love you!" I heard them yell all at once. I looked behind me and saw them gaining speed. There were only about four feet between me and two hundred teenage girls. Usually, a guy would be very happy with being chased by that many girls. But usually the girls weren't hungry for your blood. I'm depressing myself.

I kept running and skidded around the corner. When I did that I slowed considerably, and the crowd's speed had accelerated. Quickly the gap of four feet filled to two feet...one...

And then the girls tackled me to the ground, dragging me to the floor by my legs. They frantically started climbing onto me when I fell hard to the floor. I was shouting desperately for help, crawling across the ground using my arms. I was struggling because of the weight of the girls that were on me was slowing me down. But eventually I managed to get far enough from them, so I could stand up straight.

I ran away, and I heard the shuffling of dozens of people getting up. Tired and a little irritated, I still ran through Hogwarts, momentarily forgetting about the dozens of secret passages by me. They were still following me so I ran faster and around the corner. While I was looking over my shoulder I bumped into someone and fell sideways into a broom closet. The door closed after me and I heard shuffling and moaning behind the door. Then I heard someone say...

"Get off me, Potter!" I knew that voice...and I instantly thought my worst nightmare had come true. My eyes starting stinging strangely and I got up quickly.

I turned towards the door to open it...but it wouldn't open. I quickly pulled out my wand (not that one) and tried opening it magically but it still wouldn't budge.

I had gotten stuck inside a broom closet with Mrs. Norris (if that thing purring really is a cat).... and Miranda Green?

* * *

"So...Miranda. Seems like we stuck in here." I said.

"What do you mean were stuck in here?" She said, quite obviously panicking. I couldn't help but smile slightly to hear her in such distress. She was my ex after all.

"What I meant is we are stuck in here because the door won't open." I said matter a factly.

She looked at me like I was an idiot. "Let me try." She got up quickly, pushed me away from the door roughly and yanked the doorknob. Nothing happened. She tried yanking it again and this time something did happen. The doorknob came off. I groaned and she looked at the doorknob that was in her hand; horrified.

"Great. Just when you think it can't get worse." I mumbled.

"What are we going to do now?" She whispered.

"Well we have a few options. One: We could try to knock the door down. Two: we could yell really loudly to yell through the door, and hope somebody hears us. Three: we could use magic to knock the door down. And four: after all else fails, we can sit it out, and hope somebody finds us sooner or later."

She started hyperventilating. After she calmed down a bit, she talked. "Okay. Let's do all of that. And then if those don't work. We'll just wait."

So then we started by option one. Both of us tried knocking down the door using our shoulders. That didn't work, but only gave us a dull ache in our shoulders. Next step two, we yelled and yelled for twenty minutes. Nothing happened. Finally, we called quits, and moved to step three.

I tried to find my wand from my back pocket. But it wasn't there.

"Oh, shit. I dropped my wand." We were in a broom closet that was completely dark, so it was a miracle we could actually find the door.

"Is that even possible?" Miranda said, grossed out.

"Not that one. My magical wand...Okay that sounded even more wrong. But you know what I mean." I snapped irritatingly.

"Yah." She padded all her pockets. And groaned. "I left my wand in my dorm."

I blew air out of my mouth. "Okay. Option three: out. Now, option four. We sit." I felted around the broom closet. Finally I felt something. It was soft and lusciously round.

"Harry...you're hands are on my chest." I quickly moved my hands off, and was glad that the broom closet was as dark as it was. I groped, once again, into the empty air and grabbed Miranda's waist on accident. I moved my hands and slid down the wall behind me. I felt Miranda slide in next to me. Broom closets are way too small; it's a wonder people can actually snog in here, it's that small.

"So....what now?" She said.

I sighed. "We wait."

We sat in silence for an hour, until I got bored. I had been thinking about our failed relationship so I had some questions.

"Hey. You want to play a game?"

She sighed. We've been doing that a lot today. "Sure. What is it?"

"Truth. Okay, I'll go first....What happened to us?" I asked cautiously after a pause.

"I guess...Most of it was my fault. I was just so jealous. In the beginning, I didn't notice the tons of people that stared and followed you constantly. I was just so happy. But after that Malfoy love potion thing, I did notice. I mean, how could you not? Practically everyone at dinner or breakfast was staring at you, or glaring at me. After that...I just couldn't stand it. And I've never been very good at relationships so I guess I was really scared I was going to lose you. I thought that if you even talked to another girl, you'd realize how much better they are then me and leave me for them. But after we broke up I realized how much of an idiot I was acting like...and then I had to leave for a while so I couldn't fix things. And when I finally came back, here you are singing some sexy song while in your pajamas with no shirt on.....You have no idea how much I hated myself then. I had let go the most important person in my life. And here I was all heartbroken and here you were singing, flirting, and basically acting the exact opposite of what I was acting like...I'm sorry I'm rambling."

I just stared at her. Finally, after days and days, I had answers. "Oh...You know, believe me, I wasn't totally over you at breakfast, I was only doing that on some stupid dare."

"Oh..Okay. Um..It's my turn right?" I nodded, and she spoke again. "Were you really flirting with him?" She asked with a slight chuckle, like she knew what the answer was.

"NO!" I yelled.

She giggled, covering her mouth with her hand, trying to stop. She finally stopped.

"Okay. My turn." I thought hard, and came up with a good one. "Where did you go when you left?"

"Oh." She sounded surprised and sad at the same time.

"You don't have to answer if you don't want to." I said hastily.

"No no no. It's okay....I went to my uncle's funeral. He had died recently from muggle cancer." Her voice cracked several times.

"I'm sorry...Hey, if you ever need someone to talk to. I'm here. We are still friends after all."

She nodded, and I faintly saw her eyes start to water.

"Hey, come here." I brought her to my still bare chest, and she clung to me crying freely. She sobbed heavily, while I just held her tightly. I couldn't help but think we were in this position not that long ago. Except this time she wasn't crying over some petty argument.

Finally she stopped sobbing but with tears still falling down her face. I pulled away slightly and wiped them with my thumb. She looked up at me with watery eyes.

"Is that offer still on?" She asked quietly.

I nodded. "Yeah. And we do have some time. So go ahead. I'm listening."

"Okay. Well...I've never known my dad. So my uncle was like my second dad. My mum had a summer romance with my dad before I was born. And by the time I was born she hadn't seen him again. I had grown up with my mum, over various countries, living paycheck to paycheck. My dad was apparently fairly rich but she had never gotten any of his money. I don't think she would've even taken it. But, anyway, my uncle came over every day after school and we would play poker while my mom was at work till 2am. He would read me bed time stories. And always acted like the over protective father." Each word she said, more tears fell down, but she still plowed on.

This sentence took longer to say then the others. "About three years ago, he got muggle cancer. We were devastated. I was especially. I didn't want to lose my "father" and my best friend. I told him that but he just smiled and told me not to worry. He was always like that. Caring and selfless. I remember once, when I had a dance recital in London, and he had a business meeting in Scotland. He went there first, and drove back, just in time to see me." She started crying again. I held her closer and whispered comforting words in her ear. After a while she pushed back and started talking again. I listened.

"The muggle cancer he had got was a rare form that nobody had a clue about. Chemo wouldn't even help him. So the doctors did a ton of experiments on him to try to help even a little. Nothing worked. As the years went by, the less hope seemed to be left. He was so weak and brittle. And he could barely laugh without gasping in pain. He never ate, and was covered in bruises. He got injured so much that they just kept him in the hospital for his last year." She started crying again and I held her tighter and felt tears stinging the corner of my eyes. This time, she clung to me while talking.

"I remember the last time I spoke to him. It was the day that we had broken up, and I had run to Hogsmede and apparated to the hospital room. I had sobbed there while he just watched me. He couldn't really do anything in his state. Finally I had stopped and I explained to him what had happened. With all the experiments, he had gotten really bitter lately. So he insulted you. It was really half-hearted but he still said it. So I went insane. It sounds really stupid now but I was really missing you and so I just blew up. I yelled and shouted to him about everything. I don't even remember what it was about." She paused.

"I didn't even get to say goodbye. The last thing I ever said to him was "I hate you!" I'll never forgive myself for that. If I had known that that night he would die. I would've told him just how much he meant to me, and hugged him and never let go. But I didn't. And I'll never forgive myself for that." Finally she let it all go, sobbing even harder than she did before. It took twenty minutes for her to calm down and by that time she was asleep on my shoulder. I didn't really mind. She needed someone right now, and I wasn't so bitter that I wouldn't be there for her.

I estimated that it was 8 o'clock pm, guessing by the lack of footsteps and the shadow coming from the door. I laid my head on top of Miranda's, since she was still clinging to me. I knew that I didn't want to get back together with her because of how she treated me during our last days, and because I can now see that we work best when were just friends. I think that we just went too fast, and got too attached too fast.

Thinking about all this made me drowsy, so I closed my eyes. And had fallen asleep when I heard a meow and fur being rubbed against my legs. I looked down and saw Mrs. Norris purring and rubbing herself against my legs. Mrs. Norris never did this kind of stuff. So I was a little surprised.

She continued to rub herself against me. And I thought maybe she had the hots for me. But I banished that thought because cats can't have the hots for human beings.

I fell asleep with Mrs. Norris still doing that, and with Miranda still clinging to me.

A/N: Sorry, about that slightly depressing chapter. But I wanted to give Miranda a little more depth. She kind of seemed like a ditz so sorry to put on the sob stories but...I had to.

Coming in the Next Chapter:

Bladder problems...  
Rescues...  
and New Relationships.


	10. Of rescues,stuttering, and jealousy

Harry's pov

Unfortunately for me, I woke up at about 3 am; it seemed like, with a massive problem.

My bladder felt like it was going to burst any moment. I tried ignoring it, and go back to sleep but it's kind of hard to ignore when you're sitting on stone floor with a girl clinging to your mid section. I mentally looked over my options.

One: Ignore it. Tried that. Option one: out.

Two: Fall back asleep. Option two: out.

Three: Detangle Miranda off me, conjure a bucket (if I can find my wand) and do my business there.

Four: Wake up Miranda, and ask her for opinions.

I decided that number three was too risky, because she could wake up while I was…taking care of business, and I don't want that in particular to happen.

So option four seemed to be the best.

Shifting awkwardly and uncomfortably, I shook Miranda's shoulder a little. She just moaned and snuggled closer to me. She was clinging to me so tightly I couldn't really move over. I shifted over a little, the little space I could move, and shook her again. Nothing. I shifted uncomfortably again. Nothing. So I shook her again, and moved her arms off my waist. Finally she woke up and looked up at me sleepily.

"What do you want?" She said, irritated.

"Finally you wake up! I need to pee!" I am quite ashamed to say that I whined. She immediately sat up and looked up at me with wide eyes.

"Oh." She mumbled. "Okay. Um...Now that you mention it, I kind of have to, too." She bit her lip worriedly after she said it, and squirmed a little. Then crossed and uncrossed her legs several times.

"Jesus. When will they give me a break?" I mumbled. I crossed my legs, and covered my head with my hands. I stayed there for a while, until I grew a little uncomfortable, and remembered that we still had a little bit of a problem to take care of.

"Okay. Okay. Um...What do you think we should do?" I asked.

"Er...How 'bout we try to find our wands first?" I nodded and we searched the small confines of the broom closet for our wands. After I groped a little, around the cobwebbed floor, I felt something wooden, and long. My Phoenix wand!

"I found it!" I cheered. She cheered too. But our jubilation was soon stopped; when we both realized that we still had no idea what to do.

"Well...I guess we could...find or conjure up a bucket?" She questioned. I squirmed; I was beginning to think this was our only option.

"Uh...Do you think we couldn't hold it in a little longer?" She shook her head urgently, and I had to agree with her.

"Ok. Let's just do that. I'll conjure two, and we'll turn our backs and...Do our business there." I said uncomfortably, mostly because of what I had to say, and the growing bladder problem.

I lifted my wand but before I could, the door exploded, bits of wood flying onto me and a shadow, I can only assume is a person, breathing heavily in the doorway. Suddenly, I felt myself being yanked up by my cloak that I had haphazardly thrown on while running out of the Great Hall, and out of the cramped space that I had spent nine hours in. I then looked up into the furious face of Hermione Granger.

TEN MINUTES EARLIER:

"Ron? Have you seen Harry since breakfast?" Hermione questioned Ron, with a small crease of worry between her eyebrows.

Ron looked up and felt my eyes wander around the common room quizzically. "Actually, now that you mention it, I haven't. And, I also haven't seen Miranda. Maybe they're together?" He wiggled my eyebrows suggestively to internally hide my worry.

"Oh. Well...How 'bout you check the Marauder's Map? He might be there." She shrugged half-heartedly.

"Ok." Ron walked hurriedly up the stairs, and found the Marauder's Map quickly from his drawer. Noticing that the Map was already open, his eyes scanned throughout the parchment, and landed on a broom closet on the second floor. Ron's eyes widened when he noticed how close Harry was to a certain demonic Miranda Green. Internally he felt really annoyed because he knew Miranda was the worst person for my best friend. Running down the boy's staircase, stumbling a little on the last step. Regaining his composure, he walked over to Hermione and pointed out Harry on the map.

Hermione's eyes widened. "We have to split them up! This cannot happen again! Do you remember how Miranda treated him before? She was awful! I cannot let him get back together with that demon!" She cried. Hermione stood up and stepped out of the common room; ranting over my awful taste in women. Ron ran after her quickly, trying to keep up with her long strides.

Finally, they reached the particular broom closet, Ron slightly panting. Right away, Hermione walked over to the closet door and wrenched it open. The doorknob immediately came off, but she was not deterred. Hermione whipped out her wand, and without thinking about the people inside the broom closet, blasted through the door.

PRESENT TIME, HARRY'S POV:

Glaring into the occupied space, she reached out and grabbed me by my cloak. I stumbled and looked up into Hermione's glaring face. My eyes widened and I looked down quickly. Mentally readying myself for the sure to come reprimanding. I waited and waited and waited, until I realized it might not come after all. I looked up and saw Hermione still hanging onto me, and engaged in a glaring contest with Miranda.

She glared fiercely at my ex-girlfriend, Miranda resembling Hermione's expression greatly. I stood there for an equally long time, my bladder almost forgotten. Almost being the operative word. I squirmed under Hermione's grip, trying to hold in the long awaiting business that needed to be attended to. Finally Hermione broke her gaze from Miranda's, scoffed and dragged me away from the scene. I stumbled and tried to keep up with her angered strides, which were becoming even faster paced than before.

After a while of fast paced walking, Hermione finally reached the Room of Requirement, and yanked me into it. We stepped into a room with a fire, cozy armchairs, and a bathroom to my relief. It was basically a replica of the Gryffindor common room. I plopped onto the couch, extremely happy for the comfort of the room. Hermione looked like she was going to say something, but I remembered my small problem.

"Hermione? Before you curse me to next week, could I go to the bathroom first?" She looked a little mad, before stiffly nodding her head.

I gleefully ran over to the bathroom, opened the door, did my business, and came out sighing massively in relief. I plopped, once again, onto the couch and looked expectantly, yet fearfully, at Hermione.

She looked ready to scream but restrained herself and asked in a calm voice. "Harry, are you back together with Miranda?"

I looked at her strangely. "No. I mean, she hasn't asked, and neither have I, but if she does, I'll say no." I explained.

She nodded slightly in satisfaction. "Good. And why were you in a broom closet with her?" She asked, with one of her eyebrows lifted.

I quickly explained the circumstances, and left out the game of truth we had "played." I didn't think Miranda would appreciate it if I was to tell Hermione and Ron about what most likely is her most intimate secret.

At the end, Hermione smiled a little, and had an expression of understanding and pity on her face. I didn't particularly like that because I've always hated pity, and the amount of it I receive regularly. But I haven't seen the pitiful looks; I used to get from people, anymore.

Hermione patted my shoulder in a gesture that is meant to be caring, but in my opinion was only patronizing. I stood up quickly.

"Okay. If were done here, I'm going to leave. I need some food." My best friends nodded and I bowed before fast walking out of there and to my second favorite destination: The Kitchens.

'I wonder what I look like right now.' I thought. My hair was probably undoubtedly messy, my robes wrinkled and dusted with cobwebs and dust. I probably had sweat marred across my face, which I had confirmed when I swept my hand across my forehead. Fortunately, I've thought of myself as the sort of person who didn't care about their appearance. So I walked on, and to the kitchens. Unfortunately, my confidence was immediately extinguished when I saw a familiar blond head eating a chocolate sundae with a second spoon dangling off the side. 'Looks like Miranda has a sentimental side.' I thought sarcastically. After that I half ran back to the portrait hole, but not before Miranda saw me.

"Wait! Harry, come back!" Miranda half-shouted.

I sighed and turned around.

Miranda's pov

I had been sulking over my chocolate sundae, which I had almost starting crying over because of the extra spoon that was dipped into it. Were the house elves trying to torture me? Probably not but I only wanted someone else to blame but myself for my crappy life.

Anyway, I was eating my loaded with calories sundae when I heard the portrait hole open. When Harry stepped in, my heart nearly stopped. He looked even better than ever before. He was covered in cobwebs and some green stuff near his neck. His hair looked like a raven had nested in it and his whole uniform was loose and messed up. I sighed dreamily; only my ex-boyfriend can make something like that look heavenly. I suddenly regretted thinking that because my eyes filled with tears from being reminded of what I had lost.

The truth is after that whole broom closet incident, where Harry had held me when I cried and listened to everything I had to say. I've been thinking about getting back together with him. You can't really find anyone sweeter, nicer, not to mention hotter than him. And, in general, a boyfriend that treats you as good as he does. And I had let it all go over some stupid argument that I can't even remember what it was about. After everything that's happened with my uncle and others, I've never really hated myself more than when I realized all that I had screwed over.

My eyes filled with tears again at the thought, but I pushed them aside when I saw Harry turn back. I couldn't let him go again. It was time for me to suck it up and get him back.

"Wait! Harry, come back!" I yelled, with my voice cracking a little.

I heard him sigh and turn back around. I restrained myself from gasping or sighing at his appearance. I could do plenty of that when we're back together.

I watched him walk to me; walking in an extremely sexy way, that I couldn't help but gape at. I realized a little too late that my expression was probably a little bit love-sick school girls, so I rearranged my face to something more appropriate. Finally he reached me, sat down, and took the second spoon, already eating some of my chocolate sundae. For a moment, I pretended we weren't broken up and this was just our normal late night kitchen raid. I probably stayed like that for a while because Harry waved his hand in front of my face.

"You okay?" He said, kind of impatiently and cold.

Taken aback at his tone, I answered hastily. "Yeah. I'm okay. I just wanted to talk to you…And thank you for putting up with me at the broom closet. I don't know what came over me, but…just thanks." I fully stuttered through my words and blushed heavily; my gaze on my fiddling hands.

I heard him sigh. "Look…You're my friend, right? So, I'm happy to help any of my friends in any way. So…you're welcome." Was it just me or did he over exaggerate the "friends" bit a little more than usual? I felt my heart breaking at the thought. He obviously only thought of us as friends after all that blubbering business I did back at the broom closet.

"Oh. Well…There was something else I wanted to talk about." I said, still blushing and fiddling with my hands. My heart was beating a mile a minute; I wanted him back so bad.

There was silence; Harry was obviously trying to think of something to say. Finally he spoke before I had to chance to even think.

"Look...Miranda. I think I know what you're going to say. And my answer's…no." My breathing stopped and tears filled my eyes. Why can't anything go right in my life?

"I just think that we're better off as friends. After all we've gone through; I just can't seem to think of you as anything more. I'm sorry. And I hope we can leave this behind us and become good friends. So…yeah. Wait...You were asking if we could get back together, right?" His once resolute and careful expression turned worried and confused.

I let out a shaky breath. I shook my head a little too desperately. "Um…N-no. No. No. No. No no no uh...No. I j-just wanted to…ask...if you could…keep…the game of truth thing secret." He nodded. I knew I sounded like an idiot but I couldn't stop. And when I finally did I had to make up some excuse for what I wanted to talk about. I still felt incredibly heartbroken so I quickly said goodbye to Harry and ran out of the kitchen.

I ran into the nearest classroom, locked it, and cried until my tear ducts dried out. After they did, I made a resolution. If I can't be Harry's girlfriend, then I'm going to at least be his friend. It might hurt like hell to even see him but I was going to do it. And in the meanwhile, I would make sure that Harry did not go on any dates, or get a girlfriend. Because I'm going to get Harry back one way or another, and that will be that much easier if I don't have some slag to fend with.

Harry's pov

I am incredibly confused. Miranda was asking me out again…right? I'm so bloody annoyed right now. So…don't mind me.

After Miranda ran out, I had sat there; mulling over that strange conversation. Eventually my hunger won over my bewilderment and I chugged down the rest of the melted chocolate sundae. After that I looked at the clock at the entrance of the kitchen and noticed it was lunch right now. I figured since I hadn't eaten much lately, might as well.

So, I had walked down there with a confused expression over my face, which quickly turned into a glare when I saw Ginny and Anthony Goldstein sucking face on the place where I always sit. I suddenly, in the pit of my stomach, felt the need to tear them apart and pummel Goldstein's face in. But I kept that in when from the corner of my eye I saw a sad looking Miranda Green walk into the Great Hall.

My only thought was: 'Maybe, I should take up Miranda on that unspoken offer.' Then I suavely walked over, grabbed her hand, whispered something in her ear, and dragged her off to the end of the Gryffindor table. I noticed Ginny glare briefly at us, then pull Goldstein's face back to hers.

'I see how it is; Weasley…Let the games begin.' Was my last thought before I was swept in a flirtatious and jealous rage.


	11. Of flirting, nicknames, and stalking

Ginny's pov

I am so infuriated with Harry Potter right now. I don't know what is up with him and Miranda but it is definitely looking fishy. But why should I care? I have a dishy, caring, smart, and hot boyfriend attached to my arm. No, I shouldn't care because I don't need the awful, arrogant, caring, beautiful, loyal, funny, compassionate, and hot Harry Potter. That's right; I don't need him. Sigh. Why does it sound like I'm trying to convince myself? I do need him. I don't want some guy named Anthony Goldstein, I want Harry Potter. I want Harry Potter. So badly.

Who is this Anthony Goldstein and how did we get together you might ask? Well, I had always sort of overlooked him, in the past years. I mean, who would notice him if he was standing next to Harry Potter? I never really payed much attention to him, even if Anthony was part of the DA, and half of my classes. He always sat in the back and never said much, but if he did sit in the front then I'm sure I would've noticed him.

What I didn't know for about six years was Anthony has had a massive crush on me since I had first stepped into the school. I had no idea that he even knew who I was. He never looked at me, said hi, or anything, but that changed in fourth year. Since Anthony and I were in the DA, I got to know him a little better. No, he didn't speak to me, ever. But I learned from observing that watching Anthony was much more fun than watching Harry become all star struck when Cho got in a five mile radius near him. Deep calm breathes. Come on, Ginny, you can do it. Deep calm breathes. Forget about him.

I will now formally refer to Harry Potter as ******* to avoid further thoughts about that infuriating human being.

Anyway, during DA meetings I watched Anthony constantly to make sure my eyes didn't wander over to *******. And so I learned to appreciate him. Anthony was of medium height, with hazel eyes, brown hair, and a muscular physique. In fourth year, he was shorter and had less muscle. But now since he became the Ravenclaw Qudditch team's captain, his body had definitely benefited. He started to talk to me in fifth year when we had a Potions project together. I was surprised to find that he was incredibly funny and sweet. He also had a fairly deep voice that I had imagined would be a more smooth tone. We had talked a lot over that entire project, and I was fully interested in him. But after that project Anthony kind of ignored me until sixth year when he started talking again. Mostly a Hi in the hallways and an occasional talk about classes. Anthony was now only an acquaintance.

That was how he was like until yesterday when we found out about the ball. He had approached me after breakfast when I was walking back to the common room. He had been fiddling with his hair when he came towards me. I had been thinking about asking him to the ball as friends, just because I couldn't think of anyone else to go with. When I saw him walking towards me I thought I might as well ask him then but he beat me to it, as they say.

He walked next to me and started talking. "Hey Ginny. How are you? We haven't talked in a while." He questioned while looking slightly nervous. At the time I found it really cute.

"I've been good." I said half- truthfully. For the past three weeks, I haven't been so good.

"Oh. That's good. Me too. Hey, I wanted to ask you something. Do...Do you w-want to go to...the ball...with me?" He said nervously, rubbing the back of his neck. I smiled, he really was adorable.

"Yes. I would love to." I smiled widely as I said it and so did he. Damn, he had a nice smile.

"Okay. Yeah, well I'll talk to you more about that later. Bye." He smiled sweetly and kissed my cheek before walking away. I stared dreamily at the wall, with my hand over the place where he kissed me. Finally, I shook myself and went to find something to wear to the ball.

The next morning, I was at breakfast, when Anthony walked up to me. He didn't seem as nervous as he was before. But he still asked me something that made me immensely pleased. He had taken my hand, given me this spiel about how he's always liked me and would I like to be his girlfriend? I was pretty sure I couldn't have smiled wider than when I said yes. But that was easily contended with when I saw Anthony smile. He kissed me slowly and sweet. The perfect kiss; except something was missing. There was no spark, no fireworks. No need or hunger to get some more. And I know that sounds cheesy but I can't help it. I don't like kissing unless there is something else there except the attraction. Sure, he was a good kisser but just nothing was there. It was empty. Unfortunately, he probably didn't think so because he pulled back smiling even more brilliantly than ever. I just smiled back.

At lunch, Anthony sat next to me and held my hand while we ate. I found it kind of sweet because I don't appreciate a ton of PDA at the lunch table. I saw Anthony glance at the Great Hall entrance and before I could see who was there I felt Anthony pull my face to his and place his lips firmly there. And there it was! The spark was all there. I don't know how it magically appeared but it was now stronger than ever before. I lost myself in the kiss, completely forgetting where I was, running my hands through his soft hair. His hands were around my waist, and he was dipping me slightly. I moaned when he broke the kiss, and went to my neck. Once I had my eyes opened half-way I noticed, *******whispering something into Green's ear and her blushing like he said something utterly flirtatious or inappropriate. I glared at them when I saw *******take her hand and lead her to the opposite end of the table. I felt red hot jealousy burn through me but noticed that I still had my boyfriend's face attached to my neck. So I decided to take advantage of this rare moment. I grabbed Anthony's face and kissed him with the most passion I could muster. After a while of getting lost, I opened my eyes, and saw *******flirting heavily with Miranda. He had an arm around her, and she was lapping it up like a dog. I looked away, unable to control the amount of rage that enveloped me. I kissed Anthony even more fiercely. I moaned into his mouth a couple of times, getting louder each time. Partly because I wanted to make *******jealous as hell and because Anthony's snogging was that good. Anthony moved to my neck, and I moaned his name really loudly this time. I saw that our little act had attracted a lot of attention, and now *******wasn't the only one glaring at us. I didn't care. All I cared about was making *******suffer, and snogging with Anthony like the gods depended on it.

This whole charade continued until I heard someone huff impatiently behind me. I turned towards the disruptive noise, and saw McGonagall's enraged face in front of me. I paled and waited for the reprimand and detention I was sure I was going to receive. I was right.

"What is this? This kind of behavior at lunch, and from a Gryffindor nonetheless! What were you thinking? I cannot tolerate this kind of behavior! Detention, both of you! And I better not find you practically making babies at the Gryffindor table ever again!" I stared in horror as I saw her walk away. I had just heard McGonagall say "making babies." I never thought this day would come. My worst nightmare has come true. I looked over at Anthony who was equally surprised and horrified.

We went back to our lunches until we realized that our appetites had been extinguished by two fateful words. I may sound melodramatic but you try to hear those words from the strictest person you've ever met.

As we walked away, I saw ******* still whispering into Miranda's ear, with her giggling into her hand. ******* looked up and I put my arm around Anthony's waist, pecking his cheek while I did it. Out of the corner of my eye I saw him do the same to Miranda with a second later on the kiss, and I felt like slapping him across the cheek. ******* always had to be that much better than me. Miranda looked immensely thrilled and then I felt like slapping her across the cheek.

Anthony steered me out of there and I then felt like slapping him across the cheek. I felt like slapping everyone across the cheek, especially myself. Multiple times.

So, that's the prequel. Let me explain to you why I am furious at ******* Potter.

After lunch I had retreated to the common room with Anthony, where I found Miranda and ******* laughing it up on the couches. How did they get here so fast? Let's hope they didn't pull an Edward Cullen. In other words; ran here with superhuman speed. Probably unlikely but there is no other option to how they got here so fast.

Unfortunately, this wasn't what I was thinking when I saw how close they were sitting together, and how comfortable they looked. Well, I was about to change that.

I strutted over to them, dragging Anthony behind me. I sat on the couch across from them and pushed Anthony onto the couch. He looked a little stunned and kept glancing at Harry. I didn't care. I sat down on his lap and kissed him even more passionately than before. We stayed like that for a while, me acting like a total slag. I just wanted to make Miranda and ******* incredibly uncomfortable. I stopped when I heard someone clear their throat. I lifted my head and mimed looking around the common room until my eyes rested on ******* and Miranda. I looked at them fake-apologetically.

"Oh. Sorry about that. I didn't notice you were there. Excusez-moi." I moved off Anthony and sat as close as I could to him.

"So, guys. How are you? Miranda, you must be thrilled that you and Harry are back together!" I asked in a totally fake voice.

She squirmed under my gaze, and blushed. My life's purpose is fulfilled. I've made Miranda Green uncomfortable.

"Oh. We're not together; just friends." She squirmed a little more. I smiled a little evilly.

"Well, if what we did in that broom closet yesterday was anything but "together" than I don't what is." ******* said flirtatiously. I frowned deeply. What broom closet? By the look on her face, Miranda didn't look like she knew what this "broom closet" was either. Finally her face cleared up and she turned on her flirty face.

"I see what you mean. We did do some stuff that friends aren't meant to do." I frowned even more, and hoped to god they were joking. If I had looked a little to my left I would've seen Anthony frowning even deeper than I was.

"Well, I guess it's settled then. We're back together!" ******* said gleefully. Miranda looked so happy that she jumped onto Harry and tried to eat his face off...Oh, she was snogging him. It didn't look like it. It looked like she was a leech and she was trying to suck the blood out of his face. It looked like Ron at Christmas. Hehe. It looked like- I'll stop now.  
And the worst part was I couldn't rip my eyes from the scene. It was like a car crash, so horrible, yet you can't help but watch. Well that's what it's like watching the love of your life suck face with the person you hate the most. Little did I know, Anthony was thinking the same thing…

Anthony's pov

I'm been in love with Harry Potter for the past few years. I don't when it started but when I saw his puppy dog eyes I couldn't but fall. He's just so perfect.

Now you might be thinking why am I dating Ginny Weasley? Well I figured that I could get closer to Harry by being her boyfriend. Little did I know this idea would turn out to be the worst and best thing I ever did. I knew that Ginny was in love with Harry, so I figured that I could make her believe Harry hated her, make her become insecure and vulnerable. And Miranda…I knew that wouldn't last long.

So I felt my heart break into two when I saw Green and Harry making out in front of me. But I couldn't tear my eyes away. It was like a car crash, so horrible, yet you can't help but watch. Well that's what it's like to watch the love of your life eating the face off of someone you know doesn't deserve them.

Ginny's pov

I frowned deeply, when they continued to leech each other's faces off using their lips. It didn't look like they realized that I was there, or that anyone else existed in the world. After ten minutes of staring, I finally tore my eyes away and ran upstairs where I jumped onto my bed and stared blankly into the canopy. After minutes of empty thoughts and blank staring; my eyes finally filled with tears. When will we ever get it right?

Then I realized that I shouldn't be hung up on Harry when I have my own boyfriend. And if I just happen to snog Anthony when Harry's near, then so be it. In other words, I'm going to make Harry so jealous that he's going to dump Miranda, and come crawling back to me.

Harry's pov

I can't believe I did that. I can't believe I did that. I can't believe I told Miranda that we're back together. I told her that we're back together. How could I be so stupid? How? When did I become so jealous that I had to tell Miranda-my ex- that we're back together; when I had told her specifically that that wouldn't ever happen. My life is so screwed up. I was just so mad that Ginny was questioning Miranda like that, that I just blew up internally. I opened my big flirtatious mouth, and said something that I would forever regret. God, what was I thinking?

After Ginny and Anthony left I pulled my mouth from Miranda's still moving one. She stared at me with a completely blissful expression. And I knew that what I was about to say would be even harder if I looked into her face.

"Look, Miranda. I didn't-"Miranda stopped me by pecking my lips and taking my hands.

"It's okay, Harry. I know how you feel. We'll just take it slow. And I know you feel overwhelmed but that will end soon when we get back to our normal routine as a couple. So, what were you going to say?" She looked up at me with earnest, truly happy eyes, and I couldn't let that dreadful sentence come out of my mouth.

"Uh…I'll tell you later." I shook my head a little.

"Okay!" She chirped before attacking me again with her lips.

* * *

Ever since I restarted my relationship with Miranda, my life has become a mess. Every time I see Ginny and Anthony I grab Miranda and do either one of three things:

Snog her

Flirt with her

Pull her closer.

And every time they leave, after fully making out in front of everyone, I feel incredibly guilty for leading Miranda on like this. I need to grow a pair but every time I see her sad eyes as I'm about to tell her, I just have to stop right there. I need to tell her that I hadn't meant to say that we were back together. I need to. But all those thoughts are completely erased when I see either Ginny or Anthony. I'm not sure why but this unbelievable feeling settles into my stomach when I see Ginny. The thing that I didn't notice until two weeks later, is that the only other time I've felt like this was around Cho, but stronger. Unfortunately, I was oblivious to what I was feeling at this point. All I really did when I was near Ginny was work on impulse, and that really hasn't done me much good so far.

The whole day has been a disaster. I had left early for breakfast because Miranda has been grating on my nerves a little more than normal. She isn't nearly as clingy as before but now she's just subtle about the little possessive acts she does regularly. She clings to my arm, and glared at me yesterday when I looked at Ginny too long.

Usually I wait for Miranda in the common room and we go to breakfast together. Today I didn't feel up to hearing Miranda's whiny voice babble nonsense straight into my ears. So when I saw Miranda come towards me with a positively enraged expression on her face, I knew that in the four hours that I had been awake I had already made a big mistake. She stalked towards me with her skirt swinging and her hands on her rotating hips. She stood over me, and I instinctively moved away from her.

"Why didn't you wait for me? I waited down there for like ten minutes, before I realized you're probably out with your secret lover." Oh right. I forget to mention. Miranda thinks I have a secret lover because I "can't possibly be doing my homework" when I go to the library.

Normally I would've argued with her but I just rolled my eyes and turned back to my food.

"I mean, what does she have that I don't? Or is it a he? Are you gay or bi? I wouldn't be surprised. I've seen the looks you give that Malfoy kid. God, why don't you just tell who he/she is..." She continued to endlessly talk, but I tuned her out when I saw Ginny enter the hall. I smiled but that disappeared when I saw whose hand she was clinging to. Goldstein. Ginny looked over at me, and shyly smiled. I smiled too until I saw her pull Goldstein's face toward hers.

After they pulled away, and I made sure that both of them were looking my direction. I turned Miranda's face toward mine and planted my lips onto hers. I hungrily kissed her, trying to make it seem like I wanted her and that I was actually enjoying it. During the kiss, I opened my eyes and saw Ginny glaring at me and Miranda. I felt a queer satisfaction settle into my stomach before I pulled away.

Miranda looked a little stunned while she was fixing her tousled hair. I wasn't paying attention but was instead looking over at Ginny. We glared angrily at each other, for reasons that are still vaguely fuzzy to me. I suddenly felt guilty for leading Miranda on like this and vowed to break it off soon when I saw the accusatory look Ginny was currently sending me.

After a while of standing there and glaring, Ginny tugged and dragged Goldstein over to our direction. 'Oh no' I thought before she sat down.

"Hello, Harry." She said pleasantly. She narrowed her eyes a little and said stiffly. "Nice to see you Miranda." She abruptly started giggling and I knew instantly that something bad was about to happen.

"So…How are things with you and Harry?" She asked pleasantly.

"Oh. Things are going great! Aren't they, pooky-bear?" Miranda cooed. I stared at her a little incredulously before I decided to play along when I saw the irritated glare on Ginny's face…and on Anthony's.

"Things are great, sugar buns." I fought not to let a disgusted grimace come onto my face afterwards.

"I love you, cuddly cookie!" She cooed. I would've looked shocked if I hadn't heard this before from her.

"I love you more, pumpkin sparkle!" I cooed right back. I had thought of the "pumpkin sparkle" when I had glanced over at the pumpkin pie. I thought it was rather ingenious.

"No! I love you more, my sugar lipped Harry-"She was abruptly cut from her sweet tirade by Ginny.

"Oh, how sweet! You two are perfect for each other! I should know. I have the same thing myself. Anthony and I have the exact same connection. We never keep any secrets and we're constantly talking about…anything! Not to mention, he's the most handsome guy I've ever seen. He's the perfect guy for me." Throughout the whole speech her arm inched more tightly around him, and I felt my teeth grind instinctively. I looked over at Anthony, expecting him to be staring at Ginny with a love struck expression, but what I found was him staring at me with an intense expression of…lust? No, that can't be. While I wondered, I squirmed uncomfortably under his lusty gaze. He was really making me feel squeamish. I turned my head and instead looked at Ginny, who had started kissing Anthony's neck. She looked a little disgruntled because he wouldn't respond or acknowledge that she was even doing anything. He was instead still staring probingly at me.

After a few minutes of awkward silence, I climbed out of my seat and walked briskly out of the Great Hall. I breathed a sigh of relief when I heard no one following behind. Right after I did however, I looked up and bumped into a person I vaguely remembered from Potions class. Wait hadn't I seen her somewhere else? I blushed when I realized who she was. She was that girl who had walked up to my dorm room, and seen me strip my shirt off. I backed away from the slightly frenzied look she had in her eyes.

"Hi, Harry. I'm Daphne, Daphne Greengrass. But you can call me Daphe. That's what my friends call me." She sighed deeply after.

"Oh, …Hi…Daphe. Anything you want in particular?" I said cautiously. I didn't like this girl, and not just from the Slytherin robes she was wearing.

"Oh nothing. I just wanted to get acquainted. I mean, I am in love with you." She blurted the last part out, and covered her hand over her mouth, aghast. I stood there, shocked that someone I didn't even know had just admitted their love for me.

"Look…Daphne. I'm kind of with someone right now. So, I don't know if this'll work out…ever. I mean, I hardly know you. And you hardly know me so…yeah. You can't possibly be in love with me. So just get over this…infatuation, okay?" I sounded a little harsh.

She looked heartbroken and I immediately regretted telling her all that.

"Oh. Well, I'll try. But I meant what I said. I am in love with you. So mark my words, you'll be mine someday. Au revoir, mon amour." She whispered the French and kissed my cheek softly before walking away. I felt slightly troubled about what just happened. But I guess this is just a typical day in the life of Harry Potter.

Ginny's pov

I knew that something was wrong with Miranda and Harry. I saw the way that Harry grimaced when Miranda had let out that string of nicknames at breakfast.

So, I decided I was going to have to stalk him for the rest of the day to find out what was going on. I knew that this was strictly business. Not that I really minded stalking after Harry's cute behind…I did not just think that.

Anyway I was tailing after Harry, with a group of girls following, when he came back from Herbology with Miranda in tow. I gritted my teeth when I noticed how completely tangled together they were. Harry stopped walking abruptly and the girls and I dove into the nearest bush to make sure he didn't see us.

I peeked over the top of the bush and saw him take Miranda's hands. All of us grinded our teeth but stopped when we saw the look in his eyes. The Look. The Look is the look guys have when they're about to break up with you. They have this saddened and slightly apologetic expression on their face, but their eyes are saying 'good riddance.' I've never been so happy to see The Look then I was right now. I shushed the internal whooping when I heard him start talking.

"Look, Miranda. I just don't think this is…" I tuned him out and turned toward the girl crouched next to me.

"Is he really breaking up with her? It looks like he is!" Unfortunately, while I was speaking I didn't hear Harry stop talking and start walking towards this bush, until I heard his deep voice calling my name.

"Is he really breaking up with-"I stopped when I saw him standing him above me.

"Ginny? What are you doing on the ground?" He squinted his magnificent eyes and stared at me. I looked blankly up at him. My mind went blank when I saw him and I mentally tried to think of something except the way his eyes glinted in the afternoon sun.

"Uh…One of my friends-"I motioned behind me to find it empty. They had ditched me. Great, now I looked even more insane.

"I mean…I had dropped my wand and I couldn't find it. So I came over here to look?" I stared at him, begging him with my eyes for him to just believe this sad excuse. He didn't.

"Uh…your wand's in your hand." He motioned toward my hand, and I saw my unicorn hair wand in my right hand.

I slapped myself on the forehead. "Found it!" I said weakly. He merely half smiled and walked away. I watched him walk away and tried not to let my eyes wander to a certain spot.

Harry's pov

Okay, I'll admit it. I might have messed with Ginny. I mean, it was the perfect opportunity. She had been stalking me all day, in that completely obvious way. Dodging behind trees, ducking behind people, wearing black clothing and sunglasses. I mean, come on, did she really think I was that oblivious? I've had a psychotic murderer after me for the past seven years; you'd think I'd know when someone's following me. So I'd decided to mess with her head a bit. And, damn, was that fun. Did she really think I'd break up with a girl in the middle of passing period? I might be a little insensitive but not that much. That reminds me; tomorrow I will be finally breaking up with Miranda Green…Right after I win a qudditch game.


	12. Of breakups,qudditch wins,and popcorn

Disclaimer: I don't own anything...

Harry's pov

I had woken up the morning of the first qudditch game of the season at 7am. This time usually gave me a chance to calm my nerves, go over my strategies, and go through my morning workout. This workout usually consisted of stretching, a run around the qudditch pitch, and other various exercises on my broom. At the beginning of the year, this whole routine was fairly daunting but now that I'm accustomed to it, the workout only takes about twenty minutes.

The night before I had gone to sleep with an enormous headache from Miranda's constant lovey-dovey nicknames. I swear if I hear the word "Harrykins" in the next twenty four hours I'm going to upchuck all of my late night snacks over everyone who's surrounding me. And if I hear Miranda's high pitched voice close to my ear again, I might just throw myself off the Astronomy tower.

Due to the headache I had previously, I woke up with a slightly irritated feeling. So that's why when I saw Miranda sitting in the common room, I had to get it all out. I didn't care how harsh it sounded. I just needed to get all the repressed anger, frustration, and rage out of me before the qudditch game.

I hadn't been planning on breaking up with her before the game but I just couldn't stand to hear her voice again and know that I was somehow dating that specimen. So I went over to Miranda and gathered the minuscule amount of courage I seem to possess and sat next to her. Immediately following my arrival I heard a familiar high pitched screech next to my right ear.

"Harrykins!" I resisted the urge to grimace, and instead placed her hands into mine. Here we go…

Ginny's pov

The next day I was still slightly embarrassed about my "Bush/Wand" incident. So I tried to avoid Harry the best I could the following day. My brilliant plan didn't quite go according to plan, when I came down to the common room and saw Harry talking quietly to Miranda. At first, I felt the need to smack their hands apart and run back to the dorms to wallow in my own cocoon of self despair. But I halted my left foot when I saw the expression on Harry's face. I stared in awe at The Look. It was definitely going to happen this time. No one was around to interrupt them this time around, and I certainly wasn't going to. I peeked over the corner of the staircase; to avoid detection. I couldn't quite hear what Harry was saying but by the look on Miranda's face it isn't so good. Antsy to know what had made her face resemble that of a dead fish; I sneakily cast an amplifying spell in their vicinity...and now I could hear everything. Sweet victory! I leaned over more over the railing in anticipation of what, in my mind, was sure to come. I heard Harry's sweet and deep voice float over to my eagerly awaiting ears.

"Miranda. These past few weeks haven't been so great..." Harry paused and my grin widened after I heard his first sentence.

I saw Miranda tear her hands away from Harry's and heart wrenchingly put her hands over her face, tears leaking out of her eyes. I felt momentarily sorry for her but then remembered who exactly I was feeling sorry for. I pushed the thoughts away when the show went on and conjured some popcorn.

Miranda started sobbing, her shoulder's heaving up down with heavy breathes. Harry awkwardly patted her back and sat there shifting every once in a while. I popped a couple of popcorn pieces into my mouth while leaning over the banister. After two minutes of heavy sobbing and, for me, delicious popcorn, Miranda wailed something incorrigible.

"ARE YOU BREAKING UP WITH ME?" She wailed loudly, before collapsing into cries all over again. Harry tentatively started talking again after her sobs transferred to merely sniffle.

"Look, Miranda. I really don't like you." Ah-ha! His right eyebrow twitched. I've learned from many years of observation that Harry's right eyebrow twitches when he's telling the truth and the left when he's lying. 'He doesn't like her!' I sing-songed in my head. I stopped when I heard him begin to talk.

"Quite basically, I find you annoying. So, I think that we should spend some time apart." He said harshly, unfazed by the tears leaking out of Miranda's eyes. Currently I was shocked about the attitude he had right now. I've never heard him use this tone of voice except maybe to Malfoy, Snape, and Voldemort.

Miranda started to cry so hard I was afraid she'd choke on her tears...although that wouldn't be such a bad thing. As I run out of the common room, I got over my initial shock and realized what I had just witnessed. I gasped happily, and jumped ecstatically on the spot. I was so thrilled! Twirling, jumping and giggling I failed to notice how close I was getting to the railing. I tripped over my feet and tumbled down the stairs where I looked up into the face of the entire world's fantasies. Harry. Why does this always happen to ME? Why?

"Uh...Hey, Harry." I said meekly from under my tangled legs and crushed popcorn. I had tumbled down half the stairs, splaying my delicious popcorn with me, and was currently in a position that even the most talented yogi couldn't pretzel their way into. My legs were over my head, and my back was bent really weirdly. I think the worst part was when I looked over and saw my knickers were on full display. Normally, anyone would've reached over and pulled down their skirt, but currently my arms were unaccounted for. They were tangled between my legs and my head. So I instead I looked over at Harry's shocked face and reveled at the Greek god like face that just happened to be the love of my life. I flushed when I saw him glance at my exposed underwear before quickly shooting back to my face. I had decided not to try to extract myself from my current position because of the remote possibility of humiliating myself further. So I stared at Harry's face, waiting for him to offer me help. And after five minutes of uncomfortable shifting he finally did.

"Uh...Do you need help?" He asked meekly, yet with a hint of amusement in his gloriously deep voice. I flushed again when I heard his voice. I nodded stiffly because my head was bent weirdly on the floor, between my arms and twisted under my shoulders. Harry nodded satisfyingly and reached down to pull down my skirt gingerly. I flushed when he reached down so closely I could smell his tasty boy scent. While I was thinking of the things I could do to him later, now that he's broken up with Miranda, I didn't notice him bend down closer to untangle my legs until I felt his soft yet calloused hands touch them. Unfortunately, I worked on impulse and kicked him, with my legs, in the face. Harry, startled, felt down but not before grabbing my arm and pulling me with him onto the floor.

So basically, I was straddling him with my skirt bunched up around my waist. Impatiently, I tugged it down, and looked into Harry's face. I stared into his eyes which held a strange mix of amusement and lust. The second whom I couldn't believe was even present. Could Harry Potter possibly like his best friends little sister? I could only hope so.

Unfortunately, those thoughts were trumped when he started chuckling. I did too, although very hesitantly. Pretty soon our chuckles turned into full blown laughs, and then into full blown hysterics. During the last stage, I had rolled off Harry and onto the floor where we continued to laugh without end.

After five minutes we stopped and lay there with our hands gripping our sides, and our breathe coming out fast. I looked over at Harry curiously when I heard nothing come out of him for more than thirty seconds. I rolled over onto my side when I noticed him staring at me intensely.

His eyes held a certain hunger and lust and I wondered if what I was seeing what actually there or if the hope settling into my stomach had been deceived. I got my answer when Harry wrapped his arms around my waist and kissed me passionately. I melted into his arms and enjoyed the feel of his soft lips on mine. I reveled in the mere idea that I was kissing Harry Potter in my head, but realized a little too late that I was doing anything in response. He made to draw back but my hand pushed his head back, and my lips immediately crushed onto his. The kiss that followed was probably the best kiss I've ever had. The spark that wasn't there with Anthony the first time was definitely there and with a force. Goosebumps appeared on my arms that were currently around Harry, and I think I heard a firework go off in the distance.

My brain halted when I vaguely heard the name 'Anthony' surface into my mind. Oh my god, I'm currently cheating on Anthony! I never thought I was the type of person to do that sort of immoral act but here I am. I panicked but not before I felt myself being dragged away from Harry's delicious lips.

A crowd of girls clawed me away from him and I struggled to push away from the sharp nails currently digging into my skin. The girls that were pushing me back and forth between them were shouting obscenities in my ear, and shouting about Harry.

"HOW DARE YOU TOUCH MY HARRY? HE'S IN LOVE WITH ME!" Stuff like that. I tried to lift my arms to cover my ears from the shrill voices disturbing my delicate ears. I vaguely heard Harry shouting my voice in panic but hearing even that was a miracle with these girls screeching in my ears. They clawed at my hair and basically tried to hurt any part of me they could reach. Still shouting, I managed to get out of the mob and run to the common room portrait where they followed me menacingly. I ran and ran away from the Harry-obsessed freaks but didn't get too far before they reached me and dragged me down by my legs.

I was completely afraid they were planning to kill me. They had that crazed look in their eyes that kind of hinted that they indeed planned on putting me in a freezer for five days, after that placing my frozen body me in a wood chipper, and spreading bits of Ginny Weasley across the Forbidden Forest. I was seriously scared for my life until I felt someone tugging me out of the masses of females clawing at me.

I looked up at my rescuer to see Harry looking back at me before glancing back at the stalkers that were getting up as we speak. He tugged my hand and we started running in the opposite direction of where the stalkers were coming from. And so it began...

For the next twenty minutes, Harry and I were chased around the entire school. I was really struggling to keep up with his long strides, but I managed not to drag him behind me. As more time went by, I noticed, the more people left or lagged behind. When my ribs started really hurting, I glanced behind me hopefully and saw no one. Happily, yet exhausted, I let go of Harry's hand and bent down with my hands on my knees, huffing and puffing. Harry stopped running and looked over his shoulder at me. I was still bent over in exhaustion when he walked over to me. He wasn't even the slightest breathing heavily, and it seemed like he ran around the castle for twenty minutes every day. Although, his cheeks were a little flushed.

"Looks like I don't have to go on my pre-game run anymore." He shrugged. I looked up at him incredulously.

"I almost died back there! And all you can say is 'Looks like I don't have to go on my pre-game run anymore.'" I mocked him by deepening my voice when I quoted him.

"Well, I was the one who saved you...So, you're welcome." He said disgruntled, and crossed his arms. I sighed and stood up straight.

"Thank you for saving me, Harry Potter. Now, it's already ten so we should probably go to breakfast." Harry swore when he heard of the time and asked if we could go to the common room before, I agreed and we set off again. As we walked our hands occasionally brushed against the other, and I just wanted to grab his hand and never let go. But before I could do that we had reached the common room and he had started to climb the boy's staircase.

While I waited for him to come back down I sat down on one of the comfy armchairs. I sat there, thinking about all the events that had happened in the past three hours. Harry broke up with Miranda, I accidentally showed my knickers to Harry Potter, I landed on top of Harry Potter, I kissed Harry Potter, and I got chased by a massive crowd of blood thirsty stalkers with Harry Potter. Oh, what a day and I am exhausted. So much so that the next thing I remember is being shaken awake by Harry Potter because I had fallen asleep on a Gryffindor armchair.

I groaned when I felt myself being shaken awake. I had been having a nice but odd dream which I loved quite immensely. Let's just say it involved Harry Potter.

Speaking of Harry Potter, when I felt the shaking continue I opened my eyes and saw him standing over me in his qudditch robes. Wait...It wasn't a dream...It wasn't a dream! I actually kissed Harry Potter today! Woo-hoo!

I felt so incredibly giddy that I jumped up out of the chair, grabbed Harry's hands and started dancing in a circle with him. He looked really bewildered but I payed no attention. I twirled and swirled with Harry and eventually he got into it and we started dancing the tango. I felt my heart pound wildly as I was pressed against Harry's body while we danced. He had his arms wrapped against my waist, and I noticed that our faces were very close to each other. I looked down in embarrassment but, nonetheless, continued to dance with vigor in the common room.

We ended our salsa routine with a traditional dip. I was dipped low in Harry's arms and I caught his gaze easily. We stared into each other's eyes before…Harry dropped me. Of course, Ginny Weasley cannot have a single sappy moment without something going wrong.

I fell onto the carpeted floor with a dull thud and groaned from the hard impact. Harry gasped, flushed, and helped me up immediately. We stood there awkwardly while I rubbed my backside absentmindedly.

"Sorry about that. You just got a little heavy after a while…" He flushed when he said it and I flushed, also, but with a different emotion. Anger. What exactly did he mean by that?

"Are you calling me fat?" I was aware of the whininess of my voice, but I was too enraged to care.

Harry stuttered for a response. "N-No. I-I didn't mean it that way." He shook his head and my lips curved into a smirk to see Harry Potter in such distress.

"Okay." I said simply, before walking out of the common room.

Harry's pov

I watched Ginny walked away completely confused. How had I not noticed her before? I mean, before now, Ginny has always been Ron's little sister, but now…Oh my god. Ron's going to kill me for kissing his little sister. He's going to pummel me to the ground for even touching me.

…I guess I'm just gonna have to tell Ginny it was a mistake. This will prevent Ron from killing me, and Miranda won't shoot me. Plus, I don't really want Ginny to be a rebound and I'm not even sure she likes me that way. She didn't even kiss me back for thirty seconds! God, what was I thinking? Ginny can't possibly like me, Harry Potter the midget.

I sighed in disappointment and walked over to the common room.

Draco's pov

Damn, he's hot. Harry Potter, I mean. I am currently at a late breakfast, attired in my Slytherin qudditch uniform staring over at Harry who is also in his robes. I have to grudgingly admit he looks far better in the qudditch robes then I do.

They were snug but loose over his perfect body, and the low cut of the neckline exposed a decent amount of his glorious chest. His black hair is even messier than usual, and he's not wearing his glasses. He never does when he plays qudditch due to their interference to his playing. It's kinda sad because Harry doesn't look as good without his glasses than with them. Ugh, damn him and his gorgeousness.

I saw him enter the hall and unceremoniously dropped my spoonful of oatmeal onto myself, I payed no mind to it, though. Instead, I glared at Miranda Green who was presently trying to shove a piece of toast into Harry's mouth. Without thinking I marched over to where they sat, pushed them apart and sat between them. Harry's eyes narrowed in suspicion and he looked at me like I was crazy.

"So, are you guys dating?" I questioned, irritated. Harry looked at me strangely before talking.

"Well, we were-"I cut him off.

"I thought we had something special, Potter!" I shrieked the first thing that came to mind which just happened to be something incredibly embarrassing.

"What?" Harry, Miranda, and half the hall yelled. Oops, I guess I said that a little too loud.

"So last night was nothing, huh? Our relationship was just a little fling to you?" I yelled, completely frustrated. I've gone insane.

"What do you mean 'last night'?" Harry yelled.

"Our night of passion and lust was nothing to you?" I mimicked a pelvic thrust. "I thought last night was pretty special and I can guarantee I've never gone so long without stopping but I guess you can't always get what you want. Needless to say, we're over, Potter." I huffed and jumped out of the seat with a self-satisfied smirk on my lips.

Take that Harry Potter.

Harry's pov

"Is that why you broke up with me? So you could go back to your secret lover a free man? Huh? Answer me, Potter!" Miranda shrieked.

I was trying to avoid her and eating but that seemed too good to be true. I was trying to avoid _her _because: A, she's annoying. B: She's my ex. C: She's really mad right now and D: her voice is annoying. I'm trying to avoid eating because of a little incident that happened during a qudditch game which involved 2 croissants, 3 omelets, and 7 sausages. Needless to say I don't eat before a qudditch game.

After a few more minutes of staring at the treacle tart and listening to Miranda yell, I got up and left the building. Following after my exit, I heard Miranda scream my name in frustration…That's what she said. Well at least the last part of that sentence. Never mind…

I sprinted down the halls after I realized what time it was. I was about to be late to my first qudditch game in my last year at Hogwarts! Wow, last year…

I reached the changing rooms and saw the Gryffindor qudditch team congregated around the center of the locker room. They looked pretty pissed off when I arrived but their expressions cleared up when they saw me enter. In fact, most of them were blushing when I reached them. I payed no mind to that, and instead checked my clock. 11:30 am. Showtime.

I clapped my hands and skipped the traditional pep talk, we didn't have enough time.

"Okay, guys. Let's go whoop some Slytherin ass." They blushed and whooped while we left the locker room and onto the qudditch field.

Ginny's pov

Fifteen minutes later, and I cheered along with all the Gryffindors, Hufflepuffs, and Ravenclaws. Gryffindor had won 180-0. The Gryffindor chasers had scored three goals, and Harry had caught the snitch after 15 minutes. That's a record for the fastest snitch catching, or whatever it's called, in ten years. After Charlie Weasley, of course, I have to add.

My thoughts and most likely everyone else's stopped abruptly when Harry stripped off his robe and undershirt leaving his chest completely bare. I breathed in slowly and exhaled slowly to stop my heart from beating so loudly.

Harry's abs was completely sculpted and there was a light sheen of sweat on the top. The skin was a delicious color of caramel and I desperately wanted to touch them. I started to reach out to them but stopped halfway through. I don't want to look mentally insane so early in the year.

I looked around and saw a massive crowd of people circled around Harry. Most of them were pawing to touch his abs but he just turned away from them before they lifted him over their shoulders. Four girls grabbed by his arms and legs and hoisted them on their shoulders. Harry tottered a little before getting a little more accustomed to his new seat.

He looked like a god so high above all of us mortals. The sun beating on his skin made him glow with radiance and was certain every eye in the entire qudditch field was on him. I was right. Looking around, everyone was staring at him in awe and I couldn't help but do the same.

Harry was beaming with pride and confidence with everyone gawping. His smile literally lit up the sky even more than it already was and his green eyes glowed with happiness and love.

All of Hogwarts seemed to come out of their daze at the same time and started moving and breathing again. A loud whoop filled the air coming directly from Harry. Soon more whooping filled the air, and giddiness passed through the crowd because of the big win. People started dancing, singing, and dancing in commemoration for our big win and even some Slytherins joined in on the contagious joy.

Harry was carried over all of us and soon dozens of songs turned into one. Do ya think I'm sexy by Rod Stewart was sung by everyone out on the field. It was quite the scene and yet so fun to take part in.

"SHE SITS ALONE WAITING FOR SUGGESTIONS! HE'S SO NERVOUS AVOIDING ALL HER QUESTIONS! HIS LIPS ARE DRY, HER HEART IS GENTLY POUNDING. DON'T YOU JUST KNOW EXACTLY WHAT THEY'RE THINKING?" 300 hundred people say in unison. I'm surprised everyone knows the lyrics to a seventies muggle song. But on we sang and quite well I might say. And then came the grand finale...

"IF YOU WANT MY BODY AND YOU THINK I'M SEXY! COME ON, SUGAR, LET ME KNOW. IF YOU REALLY NEED ME JUST REACH OUT AND TOUCH ME! COME ON, HONEY, LET ME KNOW!" We all sing-shouted. Everyone was still staring at Harry while they sang and some people were making vulgar motions while they sang but I saw none of the teachers (who had joined in) do anything. Suddenly music came from somewhere and I turned toward the field and saw a sixth year Hufflepuff with a giant boom box on her shoulder. The giant boom box was playing Do ya think I'm sexy so our singing was more fun now.

People danced and jiggled toward the boom box and soon everyone in Hogwarts was crowded around the boom box singing the muggle song. This routine continued for a few more songs such as Don't Stop Believing, Bohemian Rhapsody, and Somewhere Only We Know. I was a little surprised about the last song but I love that song so I joined in on the singing.

Professor McGonagall had stopped the remake of high school musical when this couple started humping each other. Although, the ending of our little show didn't stop the Hogwarts population from losing hope. The whole walk back we sang the Thong Song with vigor just to annoy the teachers who were glaring at us to stop. I payed no mind.

Harry was still positioned on the four girl's shoulders, which looked like they were doing just fine holding him there.

The crowd of people reached the Gryffindor common room and stuffed ourselves in the relatively small common room. Music was playing loudly, and the center of the room became the dance floor. Then the party started.

My ears were starting to hurt from all the whooping and singing going all around me. I looked over at Harry and saw him on the couch without his shirt on and with a crowd of girls vying to his every need. I felt jealousy run through me when I saw Harry smile and talk to them flirtatiously. Whoever this Harry was I wasn't sure I liked him.

I turned away from the scene and tried to find Anthony who I was sure was here and looking for me. My eyes scanned over the heads of random people and spotted him standing in the farthest corner near the girl's staircase. I crawled through the masses of people and walked over to him, smiling. My smile, however, faltered when I saw the look on his face. It was a cross between revulsion and disgust. Uh-oh. He knew. I shook my head in disbelief; the best day of my life is turning out not so good anymore.

He sneered at me before arranging his face into a more caring yet slightly regretful expression. The Look. Damn, I thought I could've avoided The Look for the rest of the year, guess not.

Wait…Maybe I should break up with him so I can avoid the pain and embarrassment that comes with being the dumper. So, when Anthony opened his mouth to say the faithful words, I cut him off before he could even finish up his sentence.

"Ginny, I think we should br-"I cut him off quickly.

"Ibreakupwithyou!" I said rapidly. He stared at me with an incredulous expression. He blew air out of his mouth.

"What?" He asked, irritated.

"I break up with you." I said simply.

"What? I was going to break up with you! And don't you think you can't really be the dumpee because _you're_ the one who cheated on _me_!" He roared. I was taken aback by the fierceness of which he spoke with but managed to reply back after a moment's hesitance.

"Well, I'm sorry about that but I feel that it's best if we were to break up. Just know I never intended to hurt you, and that kiss with Harry was spur of the moment. Goodbye, Anthony." I sniffed and marched away from him, swaying my hips fully on purpose. I glanced over my shoulder when I was over a few feet away from him and saw him standing in the same spot with a dumbfounded and enraged expression on his face. When he saw me looking over my shoulder he gave me the finger, walked over to Miranda, grabbed her arm and dragged her out of the common room.

I followed them with my eyes and went to get a butterbeer.

Miranda's pov

I had been going over my master plan to get back Harry whilst staring at him flirting with a bunch sixth years by the couch when I felt myself being dragged out of the common room. I tried to pry the hand off but it wouldn't budge and when I stepped out of the portrait I looked into the face of my "kidnapper."

Anthony Goldstein.

What did he want with me? As I looked into his depressed and distracted eyes, I came up with a brilliant addition to my plan.

While I was thinking of my plan not more than two minutes ago, I had a hard time thinking of a way I would actually get Harry back but now that I've seen Anthony I think it's all come together quite nicely.

Anthony was still staring at the floor with a frustrated look so I decided to casually initiate part one of my brill plan.

"Hey, Anthony?" He looked up and looked at me questionably.

"Why did you bring me back here?" I raised my eyebrow in fake question.

"Uh…No reason, really. I just wanted to make Ginny mad." He shrugged half-heartedly.

"Oh…Are you and Ginny having problems?" I asked in fake surprise.

"Yeah, we broke up like ten minutes ago." I gasped in fake horror and surprise.

"Well…Do you want her back?" I asked. I watched in satisfaction as his face twisted with different emotions.

Finally his face settled. "Yes." He said with a sure nod. I smiled a little evilly.

"Well I can help you do that." I said easily and mysteriously.

He looked at me with wide eyes. "How?"

"All you have to do is distract Harry next Saturday on the Hogsmeade weekend while I talk to Ginny, and convince her that you're the one for her." I said fake cheerily.

"Okay. So…I'll just have to distract Harry while you talk to Ginny?" He asked with wonder.

"Exactly." I said.

'This is perfect.' I thought while I watched Anthony stand there with absolute glee on his face. 'While Anthony is distracting Harry, I can take care of my biggest competition. All I have to do is shove her down the vanishing cabinet on the seventh year. And bam- she comes back two weeks later disoriented, insane and without a clue of who she is. And by that time I'll have worked my charms on Harry and have become, for the third time, the girlfriend of the hottest and most famous guy in the world. Speaking of competition…I'll have to do something about that Draco fellow, he seems to be a little too close to my Harry.' I looked again at Anthony's face which still looked overcome with joy.

'Huh. This looks a little suspicious…but Anthony can't possibly be in love with Harry. No. It's just not possible. No, I'm leaving Harry in good hands on Saturday. Anthony is not in love with Harry.' I thought resolutely.

Anthony's pov

'This is perfect.' I thought. 'I can finally get Ginny off my back when Miranda fails to convince her and I get to go on a date with Harry next Saturday. I'm in love…I wonder what I should wear on Saturday?'

A/N: Sorry about the long wait, I was pretty busy over the past week so I didn't have much time. Yeah I know, Miranda's plan is pretty dumb but, in general, Miranda is a pretty dumb person.

Next Chapter:

Mobs, plans, and The Christmas Ball


	13. Phase Two, Bellatrix, and Agent 0014

Disclaimer: I, unfortunately, don't own anything.

The next week, the school was in an uproar. The Christmas Ball was that Saturday and everyone was feeling the stress of it. Of all those people, Harry Potter seemed to be having the worst time.

Mobs followed his every move, and date requests were asked, maybe, every ten minutes. He had rejected all of them, Ginny's rejection still fresh in his mind. Because of all the rejections half the Hogwarts population was suffering from, they only tried harder, and some resulted to the most wayward option: Stalking. That's right. Maybe one hundred women and men were currently stalking Harry Potter. Or as they like to call it "Observing his every move so I'll know more about him and then when I'm with him at the ball I'll impress him with all I know about him." This particular quote was taken from a Hufflepuff seventh year.

With all the people watching him eat his cereal in the morning, it was only a matter of time before some scandal broke out. And on one fateful night, it did.

A love-obsessed Ravenclaw fourth year didn't ever believe she would land the goldmine when she flew her broomstick, with her camera, to the seventh year dormitory window and peeked in. What she did find is what could be described as regular guy's messy dorm with clothes strewn everywhere. Oh, but it was so much more.

Across the room, a door lay open where, upon closer inspection, could be seen as Harry Potter showering after a rather rigorous qudditch practice. He was, of course, al naturale; nothing was hidden.

Steam was overflowing the miniscule space making it hard for the fourth year to see anything through it. This particular Ravenclaw fourth year didn't believe she had struck gold but when she saw the door and what was inside it, she gasped and took a quick picture of what could be seen.

However, when the picture came out, fully developed, her eyes widened with lust, she fell off her broom and down the seven stories of Hogwarts. Fortunately before she plummeted to the ground someone had stepped right onto the spot where she was most likely to land. So the fourth year had landed on top of an unsuspecting first year. Although, many people find it hard to believe the first year didn't hear the Ravenclaw when she was falling because of the high screams coming out of her lungs.

Somehow the Ravenclaw had managed to keep hold of the picture of Harry during her fall and two days later, when she was released from the hospital wing, she showed all her friends the picture. Who told their friends, who told their friends, who told their...you get it. Pretty soon the whole school knew or had heard about the infamous picture of Harry Potter.

The Ravenclaw fourth year had refused to make copies due to some ludicrous reason. So the only copy that existed was in the hands of the fourth year. Who's, by the way, name is Daphne Clearwater.

Daphne devised a system that would allow everyone to have a peak at this picture. Every day at 5pm, Daphne would put the picture on a little known display, with a spotlight, on the second floor so everyone could visit and see the photo. At six she would take it down. She left numerous flyers around the school; obviously in code and soon every day at 5pm a crowd waited near the display.

Harry had been fairly oblivious to all the picture business; he still didn't know someone was even watching him while he was taking the shower. So imagine the shock Harry had when he walked past the display on the second floor at exactly 6pm. No one was there at that time so Harry only had to turn his head even the slightest to get a glimpse of him nude.

And that's exactly what he did. Harry had been walking down the corridor on his way back to the common room when he had moved his a little to the right and caught a glimpse of the photo. He hadn't payed much mind to it but after a moment's hesitation he walked over to the photo.

In shock, he stared at the photo on the display and reached over to it. Harry gaped at the photo in his hand which showed him with nothing on and steam swirling around him as he tried to flatten his hair.

He was so transfixed and in shock that he didn't hear the familiar sound of pounding footsteps. At that moment, Daphne Clearwater was walking around the corner with exuberant expression lighting up her face, which fell when she saw Harry Potter with his photo in his hand. Her heels stopped clicking against the marble floor as she stopped abruptly in despair. Snapping out of her daze, she marched over to Harry and tried to sneakily and carefully pry the photo out of his fingers.

Harry wasn't so easily deceived because he brought himself out of his shock and yanked back. Daphne with narrowed eyes and a determined gaze yanked back and almost fell backwards with the force.

"This is mine, Harry. Now hand it back." Daphne said like it was obvious.

"Well, this picture is of me so therefore I deserve to have it." He said.

"Well I was the one who took it so technically it's mine!" Daphne said aggressively.

He squinted at her in concentration. He gasped in familiarity and almost lost his grip on the picture. "So you're the one I heard screaming near my dorm window!" He gaped at her in horror.

"Good job, Harry!" She said sarcastically with a sneer.

He sneered back at her and said incredulously. "What kind of person takes a picture of someone while they're taking a shower?"

"If it involves Harry Potter, everyone! Now, give me back my picture!" She shouted exasperatedly.

"No!" Harry yelled and yanked the picture back with force. She did the same not long after and pretty soon the two were involved in a tug-a-war, that fully involved rebel yells and frustrated grunts, which can only end in the same result.

With one final war cry Harry yanked the picture back with more force and strength than ever before which resulted in him almost falling over. Unfortunately, Daphne pulled at the same time as he did causing both of them to fall over and the picture to split in half from the force.

With a stunned silence between them, both of them looked at the half of the picture they had gotten. Harry groaned and made to trip Daphne over when she gave a triumphant yell, jumped up and ran down the hallway. Unfortunately for Harry all he managed to do was bang his head on the floor and get a massive headache.

And as for who got which half of the picture? Well...let's just say Daphne got the bottom half.

* * *

Harry's pov

After the little photo debacle I, basically, blew into a rage. Glaring at Daphne's retreating back, I stood up hastily and stumbled in anger. I stared at the torn picture in my hand and ripped it until it was gathered into minuscule pieces near my feet.

Glaring at the pieces I kicked them around and marched away from the scene.

Over the next two days, suspiciously, I heard nothing or saw nothing about the other half of the picture. Since the first time, when the photo was still intact, I hadn't heard anything either, I went up to Daphne about it. She had told me that she shredded the picture and didn't ever plan on doing anything like that ever again. I don't know if I should believe her as she wasn't quite looking at me as she said it.

Anyway, something weird happened today. I had been walking to dinner when Anthony stopped me. I narrowed my eyes a little as I still didn't quite like him after what happened with Ginny. He had been looking at me weirdly, it almost looked like a love-sick expression but I quickly crossed that out as Anthony can't possibly like me.

"Hey, Harry. Excited about the dance this Saturday?" He asked brightly.

A little shocked and suspicious I said. "Yeah, a little."

"Well that's good. Listen, I've noticed that things have been a little hostile between us since I broke up with Ginny and I wanted to say that we should put aside all those bad feelings and get to know each other better." He said happily.

I scanned my brain for a response. "Uh…What exactly did you have in mind?" I said slowly.

His eyes lit up. "Oh, I was thinking we could get a drink at Madam Puddifoot's on the Hogsmeade weekend on Saturday and talk for a bit. Do you have any plans that day?" He asked excitedly.

Unfortunately, I wasn't so happy about this turn of events. "No, I don't."

"Great! I'll talk to you more about it later then! Bye, Harry!" He walked away with a very noticeable spring in his step.

Oh my god, what did I just agree to?

Miranda's pov

I can't believe he did that. He was supposed to DISTRACT him! Distract him! How hard is that to understand? Okay, any normal person would've asked him to help them with their homework or…help them find their…wand, just anything really! But no, Anthony from _Ravenclaw_ had to ask him on a date! On a date! What kind of person comes up with that?

When I had heard about what Anthony had done I had stalked right out of the library and into the Ravenclaw common room where I knew he was at. I marched over to the windowsill he was sitting at, grabbed his arm, and dragged him out.

"What the hell?" I shouted in his face when we reached our destination.

Anthony spoke calmly but the quiver in his voice suggested he knew what I was talking about.

"What are you talking about?" He asked with a tilt of the head.

"I told you to distract him!" I yelled.

"And I plan to do just that." He said serenely, this only made me madder.

"Distract does not mean ask him out on a BLOODY DATE!" I roared and spit. Anthony wiped his face where some of my spit had landed.

"I did not ask him on a date. And don't you think the whole distracting concept will be much easier when he is miles away from the school where you will be doing the dirty work?"

I calmed down slightly and nodded reluctantly. "I agree. Just make sure nothing happens between you guys because that can screw up the whole plan and then you'll never get Ginny back." He nodded and we went separate ways although I am still slightly mad and in awe of what a stupid idea asking him out on a date was. Even though he still insists it isn't a date but really Madam Puddifoot's? If that doesn't physically scream "DATE" I don't know what does.

I am currently finishing phase two of my "Getting Harry Back for the Third Time and Getting Rid of All My Competitors" or "GHBFTTTAGROAMC" for short. But I don't really remember that so I just call it "GHB" for short.

Anyway phase two is the most brilliant part of my plan. I was in the library doing my charms homework when I came across a spell that was purely magnificent.

I've seen the way that Harry looks at some girls so I'm going to stop that. If he's mine, I want him to only look at me and the spell I'm going to use will make sure that happens.

The spell's details included these: Harry, out of all the girls in the school, would only be attracted to me and basically find all girls in the school, repulsive. I think its genius and all I have to do is utter two words and Harry will be following me like a puppy dog.

The incantation was fairly simple; "attirera dell" was the only thing I had to say with a flick and swish of the wand. I planned on doing it during breakfast tomorrow morning after I master the wand movement and the incantation.

Next morning:

Ah. And Phase Two of plan GHB commences. It shall be spectacular and memorable! And it shall get me what I've wanted for the past three, four days. Ah, victory is imminent!

I woke up in the morning with a refreshed vigor, climbing out of my bed happily. Bouncing slightly with every step I pulled on my most low cut shirt, shortest skirt, and highest heels. Basically I looked like a slut but today I didn't care how little my clothes are actually covering me as long as Harry's drooling at the first sight of me. I skipped the best I could with heels on, which made me fall over and twist my ankle.

'Damn it!' I thought trying unsuccessfully to untangle my legs. Groaning I patiently pulled off my shoes and put my legs into a more organized position. Standing up, I felt pain shoot up my ankle and hobbled over to my desk. I sat on a chair and looked over at my ankle. It was red, swollen, and quite frankly looked broken.

'Oh my god! Could this day get worse? How am I supposed even make it downstairs with this worthless ankle?' I buried my head in my hands as thoughts and possibilities ran through my head. Finally I came up with my only option. I must commence with Phase Two of GHB because of the amount of time I had until I had to be finished with the whole plan, which is Saturday.

So getting up from the chair I winced as my ankle once again started hurting. Ignoring the pain I put my heels back on and gasped as the pain only intensified. If these shoes hurt before they hurt ten times more with my broken ankle. Sucking up the pain I waddled over to the bathroom and opened the Aspirin bottle. Popping two of them to dull the pain of my pounding headache and ankle, I choked on them. I coughed excessively to make them come out but nothing happen except I made them travel farther down my throat. Finally after three minutes of coughing and choking, the two pills shot out of my throat and down the sink. I scrunched up my face in disgust and took two more pills out of the bottle and swallowed them one at a time. I grimaced when the bitter aftertaste settled in my mouth. I quickly brushed my teeth and applied a thick coat of eyeliner and mascara. I looked at myself appraisingly and thought I looked amazing. Harry and everyone else will be drooling when they see me. Not that I care about what everyone else thinks.

I limped out of the dorm room and into the common room. With a sudden epiphany I placed a cushioning charm on my heels and felt the pain minimize to a dull ache; the aspirin was finally working. As I placed the cushioning charm I rammed into a wall and my headache came back full force. Stumbling, I regained my composure quickly and walked out of the common room before anything else bad could happen.

I walked into the Great Hall a few minutes later during which only a few things happened. I almost fell off the moving staircases, I tripped over myself several times, Peeves dumped flour over my hair and my hair became a total flat mess.

I sighed in exasperation when I saw Harry talking to Ginny. I thought that was over with? I guess I really will have to commence with Phase Three. Ugh, what a bore.

My eyes once again scanned the Great Hall and saw Anthony staring lustfully in Ginny's direction. 'What a naive fool.' I thought. I still couldn't quite believe Anthony believed me so easily. Just watch when Anthony finds out that his precious Ginny has disappeared to who knows where. Ah, it shall be spectacular.

I stumbled into the Great Hall and looked over at Harry to see his reaction. Nothing. He didn't even look over at me; all he did was staring at the slag Ginny Weasley.

I glared at the back of Ginny's head and walked over to where they sat. I sat down hurriedly and called over Harry's attention to me.

"Harry-bear!" I called ecstatically. Isn't that the cutest nickname ever? It's second to my all time favorite, hunny bunny bumpkin boo.

Harry turned his head with a disgusted expression on his beautiful face. I shoved my chest on the table, blinked my eyes rapidly, and lowered my voice to sound sexier.

"Hi, Harry. You look awfully hot today." I said with my specially lowered and sexier voice.

He turned toward me with an appalled and disgusted expression. I felt anger build inside me. How dare he look at me like that? After all I've done for him! I glared at Ginny. 'This is all her fault. She's seduced Harry so now he's blind to all the beauty that I possess. God, could this get worse? What does she have that I don't? Maybe it's her red hair. Maybe I should dye my hair red. Maybe Harry will like me better that way. Yeah that's a good idea...' I thought with satisfaction but with another glance at Harry the anger resurfaced with full force.

I took out my wand from my skirts waistband. With the anger still intact, I waved my wand in his Harry's direction under the table and said:

"Attirera Dell Miranda!" I whispered with fever. I watched with frustration as Harry's face didn't turn blank as it was supposed. Unfortunately, I didn't notice the pimple faced, lanky, and incredibly geeky Slytherin turn around in his seat with a dazed expression. In my anger and frustration my aim was a little off.

As I watched Harry start talking to Ginny, I cast the spell again but stumbled over the words.

"Attirere De Miranda." I said this time in Harry's direction. This time the spell did hit him but with different results than expected. Harry's face turned blank and I waited with suspenseful breath when Harry would turn toward me. But that never happened.

Harry turned to Ginny with a dazed grin. His eyes traveled over her body and up again.

"Wow! Ginny, you're really hot!" He said with an enormous grin and widened eyes.

Ginny blushed and looked down. I glared a little at her.

Harry looked over the whole hall with widened eyes and shouted:

"YOU'RE ALL SO HOT!" He shouted with baffled and amazed eyes. I almost started crying when he looked at me and sneered.

"Except you." He said disgusted.

Frustrated and saddened tears emerged out of my eyes but he paid no mind. He just kept on gazing over all the 'hot' girls in the hall. After what he shouted girls started gathering around him and he lapped up the attention like a dog.

I covered my hands over my eyes and didn't notice the Slytherin behind me until he tapped me on the shoulder.

He had a lovesick expression and I instantly knew I must've done something wrong.

"Hey, Miranda. How are you today?" He sighed. I screamed and ran out, him following after my every step.

Harry's pov

My eyes wandered over the mass of beautiful girls around me. I am practically drooling, they were that gorgeous. I don't know how I didn't notice them before but I'm glad I finally realized.

I was currently flirting with, maybe, ten girls at the same time. God, life is good.

Miranda's pov

Phase Two of plan GHBFTTTAGROAMC had failed immensely. Harry basically finds every girl attractive except me.

I am currently brooding in my common room, trying to relax with Slytherin massaging my feet. Yes, it's true. I have taken the love sick Slytherin as my little puppet, or slave as some people might call it. He just wouldn't stop following me around so I've made him do some of the stuff I haven't gotten to do yet.

So far I've made him do my laundry, spy on Harry, massage feet, give me a pedicure, organize my closet, spy on Ginny, restock my supply of chocolate, and spy on Harry.

What I've heard from Agent 0014, he insisted I call him that apparently because he was two times smarter than 007 and he said he heard that comment in some muggle film named 'The Informant' and ever since he's wanted to be called it, hasn't been good.

Harry has been following, flirting, and snogging every female he has come across.

Apparently he got detention for a week when McGonagall found him snogging Millicent Bulstrode on her desk. Also another week's detention when Flitwick found him snogging Pansy Parkinson on his charms desk. He has some fetish with making out on teacher's desks. I cried for four hours when I heard about this newest bit of info.

Basically he's become a man-slut and I'm not happy about it one bit. So I've come up with extra plan; a back-up plan for the royally messed up Phase Two.

I'm going to have Agent 0014 cast the spell over again onto Harry. Hopefully the spell will have worn off by then and when recast it will work right.

Next day:

I am so screwed! So, I had Agent 0014 recast the spell on Harry while he was eating lunch. Unfortunately, the spell hadn't quite worn off, so now Harry also finds EVERYONE hot! Including guys, and maybe even Dumbledore…When did my life get so screwed up?

So now instead of flirting with every girl, he's flirting with everyone! And from what I've heard he even flirted with Agent 0014 and he's repulsive! He hasn't snogged any guys but it's only a matter of time until he does.

On Wednesday I had to see for myself what he was doing and see if he was still repulsed from the sight of me. He was.

It was during passing period and Harry had a crowd of girls and guys following him. He was ecstatically telling a story while looking appreciatively at the girl next to him. Before I walked over to him he lowered his head and forcefully kissed the girl. I felt my heart stop but I couldn't stop looking and neither could anyone else.

They stayed in that passionate embrace for a good ten minutes during which both looked like they were in heaven. But I still couldn't tear my eyes away. When they finally separated, Harry had a stupid grin on his face and the girl fell into a dead faint, falling onto the floor with a dull thud.

"Who's next?" Harry said arrogantly. Everyone in the hall raised their hands including me. I saw his eyes pass over me with a disdainful look. My heart fell once again, it still hadn't worked. After looking at me, Harry looked at the rest of the people in the hall and rested his eyes on a beautiful, yet eager, seventh year. He walked over to the redhead, that reminds me I need to get Agent 0014 to dye my hair, and dragged her into the nearest classroom. I walked away with tears flooding my eyes.

Right now, Agent 0014 is dyeing my hair the old-fashioned muggle way. I wanted him to do it this way because the color will stay in longer and the color will be more permanent. 0014 has put a blindfold over my eyes so I'll be surprised when I see my hair. I have to say, I'm starting to like Agent 0014's company, he's become my only friend at Hogwarts quickly. Even if I don't know his name.

Agent 0014's voice halted my thoughts. "Miranda? You're hair's ready." He sighed.

I eagerly ripped off the blindfold and waited until I could see again. I gaped. This can't be happening!

The hair color was a very unattractive bright orange with streaks of platinum blond. I looked like circus clown. I screamed very loudly and pinched myself to make sure this was not a dream. Pain shot up my arm but otherwise I was still looking at my hideous hair.

Agent 0014 sighed in happiness and I remembered his presence. "WHAT THE HELL IS THIS? IS THIS A JOKE? AM I BEING PUNK'D?" I looked wildly around, trying to find the hidden cameras that I was sure were there.

"No." 0014 said with a confused look. I stared at him angrily and ran to my bed where I screamed into my pillow.

Draco's pov

'Harry Potter just flirted with me. Flirted with me. ME. Harry Potter. Flirted with me. Harry. Potter. Flirted. With. Me. FLIRTED. WITH. ME. HARRY. POTTER.' I thought before I fainted.

Harry's pov

"There is something wrong with you, Harry..." I heard Hermione distantly say. I wasn't really listening because I was looking over at a very hot sixth year across the hall from me. She was wearing a very short skirt which I was currently staring at me.

Leaving behind Hermione's reprimanding I walked over to the hot girl but halfway to her I felt something settle over me. My face became blank and I felt a little queasy.

My only thought before I ran away was:

'What the hell happened to me?'

* * *

Hogwarts was incredibly sad about the termination of man-slut Harry Potter. But even more were angry. Harry Potter hasn't ever in his life had 'I thought we had something special!' yelled into his ear than that first day. And he was especially shocked when Draco Malfoy yelled that into his face too.

The only comfort and fun he had been when he saw the state of Miranda Green's hair. He probably hasn't laughed as hard as when he saw her hair.

Pretty soon everyone got over their anger and sadness and everything went back normal. But, of course, in Harry Potter's life nothing is ever normal.

* * *

Harry's pov

Something strange and disgusting just happened.

Ron and I were at Hogsmede to restock on our candy and to get a butter beer, when we heard a crash from outside. I ran out of Honeydukes when I heard screams coming from the main street. What I saw was complete chaos and dozens of Death Eaters torturing people. I felt anger build inside me and I shot spell after spell on the Death Eaters. When they saw me all of them froze and stared at me.

They started walking towards me and I stayed where I was; I wasn't afraid of these cowards. But instead of attacking me or trying to kill me, they started petting my hair. I squirmed away from them but they managed to continue.

"My, my, my, Harry Potter you've grown awfully fast. You're even more gorgeous in person. I must say I'm a fan of your photos in that muggle newspaper. They were excellent. Would you mind taking a couple of similar pictures with us?" One of them that sounded suspiciously like Bellatrix Lestrange said.

"Um...No. Could you kindly get off me?" I asked impatiently.

"You're hair is so soft." Bellatrix murmured.

They continued to comb through my hair and I tried to grab my wand from my back pocket but only ended up elbowing the nearest Death Eater when I finally reached it.

"Tsk, tsk, tsk, Harrykins. Don't think you can rid of us so easily." Bellatrix said as she summoned my wand. I was now unarmed. Damn.

"If only you weren't goody-two-shoes-Potter I might just do some explicit stuff to you. If only the Dark Lord would let me kidnap you I might just have my way with you. I've always wondered if you were a feisty one." Lestrange mumbled as her hands went from my hair to my chest and then lower. I kicked in her direction before she could get any lower. She didn't react.

She sighed. "I guess we'll have to leave you, Harry darling, before the muggle-loving fool comes along." All the others disapparated but Bellatrix stayed where she was. She leaned up and whispered into my ear:

"Be a good boy, Harry. We will meet again and I shall be waiting." She sighed. "It will be a sad day when the Dark Lord kills you." I shivered in disgust.

She kissed my forehead through her mask, and disapparated the only sound in all of Hogsmeade being the pop and the thud my wand made when it hit the ground.

Hogsmeade was oddly deserted when I looked around not including Ron and me. I picked up my wand and turned to Ron who was standing there, shocked.

We walked back to Hogwarts after a quick butter beer from the Three Broomsticks. When we arrived back at the dorm, I immediately jumped in the shower, making sure the door was closed, and scrubbed myself clean for thirty minutes. But even after that amount of time, I still felt I had Lestrange and Death Eater all over me.


	14. Of schemes, dates, and Mark Green

CHAP 14

Harry's POV

I am really annoyed with Ron and Hermione right now. It's not a date for god's sake! Jeez, why won't they just leave me alone?

Allow me to explain. Earlier today, I had told Hermione and Ron that I had plans with someone at Hogsmeade. When they questioned me about whom I was going with, I told them Anthony. Then they, quite predictably, started laughing hysterically. About two years ago Hermione wouldn't have started laughing at a crisis like this but since she started dating Ron she's become a lot more laid back than before. Right now I'm not so sure I like this new her.

Anyway, after about ten minutes of continuous laughter, I managed to shut them up. I knew that the silencio charm would come in handy soon enough…

Flashback:

Hermione mimed towards my wand and then to her mouth to get me to take off the spell. After seeing the massive glare on her face, I quickly took it off with a grimace and stared at my plate-readying myself for the explosion. But nothing came. Carefully, I looked up and saw a large grin stretched across Hermione's face.

"What is so funny?" I asked her, very irritated.

"Oh, nothing." She paused and grinned wider. "Except that you're going on a date with Anthony Goldstein." Ron looked up from trying to find his wand and grinned as well. Oh god, it's like they're twins.

"What? No, no, no, no. It's not a date. No no no no no no no. Nope. Nope. Nope." Too late, I realized that the guilty protest too much. But it's not like I'm guilty of anything! It is not a date! At least, I don't want it to be one...

"Okay. Well then if it's not a date, where are you guys going on Saturday?" I felt like punching the amused expression off Hermione's face.

"Madam Puddifoot's." I mumbled with my gaze on my fiddling fingers.

"Excuse me? I didn't quite hear you." I didn't need to look up to know she was trying not to laugh.

Very irritated, I shouted: "Madam Puddifoot's, okay?"

Hermione eyes widened but so did her grin.

She put up her hands in defense. "Okay." She said with a smirk.

"Just remember not to put out on the first date. You wouldn't want Anthony to think you're easy." Hermione said smugly. She and Ron started laughing very loudly. I glared at them fiercely.

"It's not a date!" I yelled. They ignored me.

"Hey, Harry. Make sure to bring some mints with you so you'll be ready for your first kiss." Ron said. I glared once more.

"So, Harry, what are you going to wear?" I felt my anger dissolve and I answered hastily.

"I was thinking about this green collared shirt to bring out my e-"I stopped talking when I realized what I was saying and that Hermione and Ron were trying desperately not to laugh.

Finally they let out their humor with two incredibly loud laughs and I yelled at them.

"It's not a date!" I shouted but even to me it sounded like I was uncertain.

Ron stopped laughing long enough to say, "Okay." I glared, almost feeling steam coming out of my head as I picked up my bag and ran out of the hall, their laughing haunting my every step.

Ever since they have been bugging me so much about the whole thing. Almost every moment today I've heard a sly comment from them about Saturday. Stuff like, "Have you ironed your green collared shirt yet?" and "Hey, Harry. You want to borrow my cherry lip balm for your big date?" And their all time favourite, "Remember not to even bother brushing your hair when you and Anthony are probably going to mess it up later tonight." They laughed particularly loud after that one...Even I have to admit that one was funny.

Right now they're still laughing at a really sly comment Ron just made while I was getting ready for my _casual lunch_ with Anthony. I have decided to not wear my green shirt because I don't want to be even more tortured by Hermione and Ron when they see me wearing it. And partly because I want to look as bad as possible so that if Anthony really intended this as a date then I don't look like I care.

I haven't found anything that has made me look the slightest casual or horrible, so I've grudgingly decided to ask help from Hermione and Ron.

"Hey, guys? Could you help me find something to wear that makes me look bad or that I don't care?" I said meekly.

"Oh? And why would you want us to do that? Surely, you'd want to make yourself look remarkable for your soon to be new boyfriend." Hermione said with a smirk.

"No! I don't because I am perfectly straight and I wouldn't even want him as a boyfriend even if I wasn't. Which I am."

"Ohhh… Methinkith doth protestith too much…ith." Ron said kind of stupidly…ith.

I sighed tiredly. "Look could you guys just help me already? We don't have much more time." I glared at them a little to make them agree faster.

Smiling a little, Hermione nodded. "Okay. I'll just be right back. Ron, help him while I'm gone." She kissed Ron quickly and we got to work.

While we were waiting for Hermione to come back from wherever she went, Ron and I went through my dresser. So far, we haven't found anything that was atrocious enough to wear.

I tried on one of Petunia's old blouses, (surprisingly most of Dudley's old clothing is Petunia's), but even that looked good. It was a puke green shirt with capped sleeves, and a ruffled collar. But the green color had accentuated my eyes and the frills made my neck thinner and my shoulders broader.

By the time Hermione came back, Ron and I had given up hope. Ron was lying on his bed and I was stretched out on mine without a shirt on. What I did see was Hermione was holding. What I didn't see was her stop abruptly and stare at me.

She gaped for more than a minute in which I had stood up and waved my hand in front of her face. She snapped out of her gaping and smiled hesitantly. I saw her eyes wander to my chest and I crossed my arms self consciously.

As her eyes traveled back to my face, she started talking. "Okay. I brought some stuff for you from my dorm. I figured that with your very attractive looks that nothing would look horrendous on you. I decided to bring you some of my own clothes."

She spread a pile of clothes on my bed and I internally groaned. Most of them were short skirts, high heels, low cut tops, and low rise jeans. I had no idea that Hermione even owned these sorts of clothes. But even then there was no way I was going to wear any of these.

"No." I said while shaking my head repeatedly.

"Oh come on, Harry. Just try something on once. It's worth a try." Ron groaned out. I stared at the clothes assembled over my bed and reluctantly nodded.

Hermione squealed and clapped her hands excitedly. I shook my head and smiled tiredly. I have a feeling soon I will feel like those dogs that are dressed up by their owners.

She walked over to the bed and put together a bright green shirt and a pleated black skirt. She looked up at me and smiled uncertainly. I realized she wanted to know my opinion.

"No. I don't care how bad I look, I'm not gonna let myself look like a Slytherin." I said firmly. Hermione nodded and switched the skirt with a pair of turquoise low rise jeans. Yes, turquoise. I reluctantly nodded. I might as well try something on. I pulled the green shirt over my head and tried to pull down the shirt once it was down. Half of my stomach was showing because of the shortness and the tightness of Hermione's shirt. I pulled off my shorts and pulled on the jeans. Hermione must have placed an enlargement charm on the jeans because they fit albeit very tightly. Without looking down at how short the jeans were, I walked over to the full length mirror in the bathroom and gaped at what I saw.

The green shirt was so tight that my abs and chest could be seen quite clearly. The turquoise jeans were clinging to my thighs and were two, maybe, three inches short and made the jeans look ridiculous. Basically I think I look horrendous. But...

I walked out of the bathroom with a frown on my face. No, there is no way that I am going to do something as ridiculous as this. Sure, Sirius might have done a stunt like this is in his time but there is no way that I will. I am a dignified human being! Who belongs in clothing that actually fits me!

I walked out of the bathroom and shook my head.

Ron and Hermione started clapping but stopped when they saw me start to take all of it off.

I was trying to make a statement by tearing off the shirt really quickly but unfortunately, it kind of got stuck half way. After a few seconds of flapping around like a fish out of the water, I mumbled for help.

Quickly, Ron and Hermione rushed to my aid. With their joint effort, I managed to get all of the poorly fitting clothes off me.

"Why did you take it off? It was perfect!" Ron whined, looking confused and put off. I ignored him and walked over to my bed to put on my actual clothes.

"I can't do that. Not only is it embarrassing for me but for Anthony too. If he actually thinks this is a date and tries something with me, I need to be an adult and tell him that there is no chance for us. Not pull some stupid stunt so that I don't have to hurt anyone's feelings. Besides, I don't want to lead him on." I said with a final tone and put on a pair of dark jeans with a black tee.

* * *

Two hours later, I was standing by the Great Hall waiting for Anthony. Almost immediately after I gave my speech, Hermione engulfed me into a hug. She told me that she was proud of me and that she loved the young man that I have become. Something about that moment told me that's what it would feel like with a mother, if she was alive. It was nice.

After that, Hermione managed to mess up my hair in such a charming way that I wondered why I never asked Hermione for help on my hair issue. She had gotten her hair in control for the Yule Ball after all.

As I stood there, I wondered why Hermione had even bothered doing something to my hair when I was just going to go to spend the day with a mate. Nothing more.

As I wondered, Anthony finally came around the corner. I have to admit, he did dress to impress. Dark jeans were neatly pressed and the peacoat he had on matched the trousers perfectly.

Anthony stared at me with a wakeful expression and with a little bit of smile once he reached me. I would say he does look a bit smitten.

"Hey, Harry. You ready to go?" He said with a grin.

"Sure." I said cheerfully, like nothing at all was bothering me. Anthony nodded and we walked to the doors. I kept a foot away from Anthony the whole time and he didn't even seem to notice. But what he did do frequently was close the gap between us by trying to grab my hand. I now felt incredibly uncomfortable. Was he really trying to hold my hand? God, I hope not. But what else could he be doing? There's no other explanation other than he's trying to hold my hand.

Please don't let Hermione and Ron be right. I don't want to hear them gloat about it if this really was intended as a date.

In the past five minutes Anthony has tried to grab my hand ten times. Talk about awkward.

How many times is Anthony going to grab my hand before he gets a clue? Can't he see I have no interest in him?

Ow ow ow ow ow. I have just twisted my you randomnly placed rock that jumped right into my view without me noticing! Oh, and Anthony has continues walking. Talk about an interested suitor!

I managed to untwist my ankle yet it still hurts like hell. Now we are entering the village of Hogsmeade where people are staring at me like I'm Louis the Fourteenth. Why didn't I just go with the plan, Anthony would have ditched me the second he saw me!

Anthony keeps on glancing at me from across the table at the Three Broomsticks. I begged Anthony to let us go here. Since we've arrived he hasn't talked to me at all, all he's done is stare at his cup of tea and biscuits. And glance up at me every two seconds of awkward silence. And to make it worse, I'm surrounded by cuddling and snogging couples. I thought the Three Broomsticks was a safe zone!

I tore my gaze away from one particularly active couple and instead looked at Anthony. He was still staring at his tea and it didn't seem like he was going to talk any time soon. Finally I decided to talk for him.

"So…how are you, Anthony?" I asked.

He looked up and answered confidently. "Well I'm pretty good right now. Especially because I'm with you." He said while staring into my eyes eagerly. Ugh, what am I going to do

"Okay. So, Harry, tell me about yourself." Anthony said earnestly after I continued not to say anything.

I looked around uncomfortably. I really didn't want to talk about myself.

"Well…I'm sure you've heard my life story before." I said.

"But not from you." I squirmed from under his very adoring and sickening gaze. He was looking at me like I was the best thing since sliced bread. Shouldn't he be looking at someone else with that look?

And then when he was trying to grab my hand I realized something. Anthony just cannot get a clue. So I might as well embarrass him so much that he'll never want to be in my presence ever again.

This calls for drastic measures.

I batted my eyelashes at Anthony. I started talking in a fake high pitched voice. "Well, I was born in England." I talked slowly and accentuated every syllable.

Anthony looked at me with widened eyes when I continued talking in that high pitched ditzy voice about the most random and trivial things I could think of. Basically I talked for over twenty minutes about random things like what happened when I was six and I slipped over a pile of whipped cream near my aunt and uncle's bed. After thirty minutes or so Anthony had stopped paying attention to what I was saying and was instead staring at me in absolute horror. I smiled in satisfaction.

"And my favorite song is Dick in a Box-"I said but was stopped abruptly when Anthony exclaimed. This, of course, was a lie because I've only ever heard this song a minimum of three times.

"Oh my god! I love that song!" And if that wasn't bad enough, he opened his mouth and quietly started singing it. Not one to be overdone I started singing along, but much louder.

"Girl you know we've been together such a long, long time. Such a long time. And now I'm ready to lay it on the line. Wo-ow you know it's Christmas ( I wiggled my shoulders up and down) and my heart is open wide. Gonna give ya something so you know what's on my mind. ( I tapped my head with my ring finger.) A gift real special so take off the to-opp take a look inside…it's my dick in a box." The whole time I sang that section I made weird gestures with my hands, made weird expressions on my face, basically made an ass of myself.

At the end of that verse, I got out of my seat quickly, almost managing to twist my ankle again, and continued singing even louder. With a sudden burst of genius I cast an amplifying spell on my voice and now all of the small bar could hear very clearly.

"Not gonna you a diamond ring that sort of gift don't mean anything. Not gonna get you a fancy car. Girl you gotta know you're my shining star. Not gonna get you a house in the hills. A girl like you means something real. Wanna get you something from the heart."

On this part I weaved through the blatantly staring students and sang and dance with a gusto like never before. "IT'S MY DICK IN A BOX! MY DICK IN A BOX BABE! IT'S MY DICK IN A BOX! WHOO-OO! IT'S MY DICK IN A BOX, GIRL!" Coming up to people's ears I sang in them, and looked back at Anthony occasionally. He was staring at me with absolute horror and embarrassment. For a moment I felt bad that I was doing to him but that evaporated when I remembered why I was doing it in the first place. Plus this was way too much fun.

I continued to sing and dance through the aisles. After two more minutes of the most fun I've had in a long time, I ended the song.

"MY DICK IN A BOX!" I half-shouted with my arms wide. There was silence throughout the entire demon cafe for a solid five minutes until someone started clapping slowly. Soon more people joined in and soon the entire cafe was whooping and shouting in applause. Some even shouted for an encore. Fortunately, that didn't include Anthony since it seemed like he had left after the second verse.

Suddenly, I felt myself being yanked to the exit using my ear. I cried out in pain and looked over at the person injuring me. Madam Rosmerta. Damn.

Ten minutes later, I walked out of the Three Broomsticks with a dull ache in my ears and a red face. What happened? Well let's just say I'll never be allowed into the Three Broomsticks ever again.

* * *

Miranda's POV

Damn you Ginny Weasley! She just got me expelled! Well, I guess I shouldn't have tried to shove her down the vanishing cabinet without looking to see that McGonagall wasn't walking by at that moment...But still. How dare she?

Well at least I got some competition out of the way today. I had been walking back from Dumbledore's office when Anthony came walking up to me, mumbling something about thinking you know someone, embarrassing moments, and really bad dates.

So he comes up to me and says one thing with absolute disgust: "You can have him, the freak." Of course, I'm assuming that by 'him' he's referring to Harry. God, I hope he is.

This ruins all of my plans. If I'm expelled from Hogwarts then I can't deal with Ginny, and I can't get back together with Harry. Oh my god, what have I done? This has been the worst day of my life!

Wait a minute...Miranda Green has been expelled from Hogwarts but Mark Green hasn't. Mark Green, Miranda's twin brother. This is perfect! Nobody will suspect anything!

Okay, okay. I have to go to a muggle mall or something. Get a wig, some baggy boy's clothes so you can't see my figure...Yes that's it. I must leave immediately.

* * *

Damn it! I guess Dumbledore's not as much as an idiot as I thought he was...Operation Mark Green has failed miserably and now I have McGonagall personally escorting me out of Hogwarts.

Sigh. Goodbye Harry Potter. I love you.


	15. Of Polyjuice Potion, HPFC, and kidnaps

Previously on The New Harry:

Damn it! I guess Dumbledore's not as much as an idiot as I thought he was...Operation Mark Green has failed miserably and now I have McGonagall personally escorting me out of Hogwarts.

Sigh. Goodbye Harry Potter. I love you.

* * *

So he comes up to me and says one thing with absolute disgust: "You can have him, the freak." Of course, I'm assuming that by 'him' he's referring to Harry. God, I hope he is.

* * *

Ten minutes later, I walked out of the Three Broomsticks with a dull ache in my ears and a red face. What happened? Well let's just say I'll never be allowed into the Three Broomsticks ever again.

* * *

And now...Chapter 15

2 Weeks Earlier:

"You did WHAT?" Harry shouted into Ron's grimacing face.

"I entered us into the talent show at the Christmas Ball." Ron mumbled with his head down which is understandable since fury was written all over Harry Potter's face and when that happens, it is a scary yet attractive sight...

Harry glared even more; it's seems he can't enjoy breakfast without something destructive or infuriating happening.

"Us?" He said in an awfully quiet and controlled voice.

"Yes. The Marauders 2.0." Ron continued in a muttered fright.

"And who does the Marauders 2.0 include?" Harry asked in the same tone as before.

"Um...me, Neville, Seamus, and...you?" Ron said meekly before looking and widening his eyes in a pore but successful attempt at puppy dog eyes.

"Come on, Harry. Just do this one thing for me. You don't even have to play anything. You'll be the singer. And I found a spell that will give us the ability to play our instruments and it's gonna be awesome. And I just want some of the spotlight, you know? Please...Please, harry. Come on. Please?"Ron widened his eyes and jutted out his bottom lip.

Harry's eyes narrowed even more and sighed after a couple of moments.

"Okay." Harry said in defeat. Ron squealed and Harry looked at him very strangely.

"So what song are we playing?" Harry said, no longer angry as he ate his pancakes.

Ron looked around suspiciously to make sure no one was looking or listening. Which they were, but looking at Harry more specifically.

"Take Me Out by Franz Ferdinand. And I thought as a surprise for Hermione who could do Baby, I'm Yours by The Arctic Monkeys."

Harry nodded. "Sounds good. And who is playing what?"

"I'm playing the drums, Neville the bass, Seamus the guitar, and you'll be singing."

"Great. This is gonna be awesome." Harry said sarcastically.

* * *

Current Day: thirty minutes before the Christmas Ball. December 24, 1997

Harry's POV

'I can't believe this is happening. Seriously? Is this a dream? Am I hallucinating? Merlin's boxers, I really hope I am.' I think frantically as I stare gloomily at the dank bathroom floor of someone else's dormitory.

Now, you might be wondering what Harry Potter might be hallucinating about. Well, here it is.

FLASHBACK to two hours ago:

I was calmly walking through the second floor hallway when the weirdest thing happened.

Out of nowhere this girl, who I vaguely remember seeing before, comes up to me with tears pouring down her face and slaps me across the face. Hard. It's still stinging. After almost two hours.

I lift my hand to my cheek and stare in confusion at the girl who just slapped me. She looks really familiar but at that moment I didn't really care about that point and was instead focusing on the powerful stinging on my cheek.

I continued to stare in shock at the girl when she proceeded to sob and run away from me.

'Owww.' I'm still thinking as I walk up the boy's dormitory staircase. That slap has made me slightly disoriented so when I walked up I stumbled every few steps.

This fact also didn't seem to help my situation when out of nowhere I felt a hand cover my mouth and a silk Gryffindor tie obscure my eyes. If the red and yellow that flashed before my eyes is actually a Gryffindor tie. I started panicking as I was roughly yet hesitantly pushed away from my dorm and to a completely different one. My arms flung wildly as I tried to escape the person holding me down. That didn't exactly help me at all since all I heard was a muffled groan and felt myself being thrusted even more toward my 'destination.' I knew that my kidnapper was a guy because of the low groan he had let out and the hands that were forcing me somewhere were rough and calloused. Clear signs of a dude.

After a while of being wildly dragged, I stopped trying to evade my kidnapper and instead concentrated on my surroundings. Clearly I was near the guy's dormitories since I hadn't been tripped over the stairs. I wasn't in my dorm or in a dorm at all, because I would've been able to smell the egg salad sandwich that Ron has been keeping under his bed for the past week. We're considering kicking him out if he doesn't throw it away immediately and Febreeze the entire dorm until no trace of moldy eggs is left.

Unfortunately, I only had a few seconds of trying to assess where I was being taken before I was jostled into a hard door or wall. Although I'm assuming that it's a door since I felt a round object, namely a doorknob, dig into my hip. Ow.

This time I didn't bother trying to resist and instead walked patiently to where I was being taken. I still was completely blindfolded but I could smell the pristine taste of massive amounts of cleaning products. Whoever lived here was a complete clean freak. They were such a clean freak I didn't even have to see the dorm to know. Now that's sad.

At that moment I decided that since I didn't particularly like the person who was doing this to me, I might as well make them as uncomfortable as possible. So I told them that.

"You know, person who is currently kidnapping me and will probably do Merlin knows what to me, this place smells incredibly like cleaning products. Whoever lives here, are they some sort of neat freak? Because I don't even have to see this place to know that they are and that is sad."

I felt the guy pauses before talking in a high pitched voice to conceal their voice. Loser.

"Well, I don't know about that. But I'm sure the person who lives here is probably just looking after their hygiene since a ton of germs and diseases are originated in the home setting." I snorted and raised my eyebrow. Well, that was snobby.

"Well, no offense, but they don't seem to have much of a life then. So, when is Voldy-shorts gonna make his appearance?" I figured that the only person who would have much value for me would have to be a Death Eater and if a Death Eater is involved then surely Riddle would have to be too.

But what he said next surprised and shocked me at the same time.

"Oh…I'm not a Death Eater. And 'Voldy-shorts' as you like to call him," He chortled lightly at this then continued. "Isn't going to make an appearance, at least I hope." Surprisingly, he seemed to be a little terrified when he said that in a very meek voice. But that could just be my imagination since he was still talking in high pitched voice.

I lapsed into silence and realized that the whole time we had been talking, we'd stopped walking. It seemed that we had finally reached the destination. Hopefully, I would be able to see my kidnapper. And I did.

I was shoved into the corner and a cabinet of some sort was digging into my back. Once again, the place reeked of Mr. Clean. Ugh, I can barely sit here for thirty seconds without throwing up and who knows how long I'll be stuck in here.

"So, now that we've reached my holding facility, whatcha doing to me now? Avada me? Do something equally disturbing?" I said in a snarky fashion.

He gasped in a girly way. "I would never do anything to harm you. You mean too much to me." This time his voice stayed the same…and it sounded very familiar. I scrunched my face in concentration and finally realized who the voice belonged too. This time, I was the one who gasped.

"Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god." I ranted when I comprehended exactly who it was. Although I'm not exactly how it's possible…Soon I would find out.

"Shut up!" The voice shouted in a panic before carefully stepping behind me and taking off the tie quickly.

I peered through the bright lights of a pristine bathroom and gaped at the sight of…myself? My eyes widened at the plain sight before me and I stumbled as I stood up hastily. Oh, no. This is very bad. I reached out before me and touched the face of myself.

…Did I really look like that? Wow…I really need to shave, way too much stubble. Otherwise, wow. I'm kinda hot. Why didn't anyone tell me? Geez, look at those arm muscles. I lifted my own arm and kissed those delightful muscles. I have got amazing guns.

I continued to touch and pinch my face that was on the intruder. Wow…I'm quite speechless right now. Dazed, I finally shook my head out of my newly required arrogance and assessed the situation carefully. Either this person was my long lost evil twin, Larry, a Slytherin, or a Death Eater. And since nothing in my life can go right, I picked the most likely option.

"LARRY, MY LONG LOST EVIL TWIN WHO JUST HAPPENS TO BE A DEATH EATER! HOW DARE YOU KIDNAP ME?" I screamed as loud as I could. Seriously, what did he expect to do with me?

"SHHHH." Larry said while covering his hand onto my mouth. You have no idea how creepy it is to see yourself put your hand on your mouth.

"I'm not your evil twin, Harry. Although if I were your twin I would surely not be the evil one." He stared at me with a strange sense of longing. Shudder.

He ran his hands down my arms. Oh my god. "I love you too much for that." I chocked over my own saliva. Did he really just say that? Whoever this guy is I wouldn't be surprised if he was stalking me. I shivered. Who knows what he's seen.

"So…who are you, then?" I asked suspiciously.

He sighed, then turned "my" head toward me and dreamily looked into my eyes. I gulped. Whatever happened now probably wouldn't be too good for me.

"I'm…Colin Creevey." "Colin" said sheepishly.

"CREEVEY? I'M GONNA KILL YOU!" I shouted as I jumped onto myself and tried to strangle him. I might've been successful if Creevey didn't happen to be me, which entitles that he happens to have the same awesomely strong body as me meaning that he easily shoved me off before I could assess his neck. Damn.

I stood up and faced the opposite wall, glaring at it fiercely.

"Why? Why did you turn yourself into me?" I said tiredly.

"Well…it's quite simple really. I'm just…I wanted to be you for a day. Just for a day to be the infamous Harry Potter would be my ultimate dream and now I've finally done it. It feels great."

I turned my head and looked at him weirdly. "Why the hell would you want to be me?"

Colin sighed. "Why wouldn't I want to be you? You've got eternal fame and glory. Every day in your life is an adventure. The girls chase you like crazy and I'm sure that there's not a single person in Hogwarts, and the world in general, that wouldn't want to be with you. Also, everyone knows your name. And you're hot. Like, really hot." I couldn't really deny that.

I shrugged. "Yeah, that's true." I nodded vigorously.

"Well anyway, that's why I devised a plan. I had concocted Polyjuice Potion about three months ago and finally yesterday it was finished. I had stolen your favorite comb."

"Hey, that's where it went! For the past two months I haven't been able to comb my hair into the perfect mess of spiked hair."

He grinned sheepishly, again. "Yeah, sorry 'bout that. Anyway, so I stole that comb and put the comb in and here I am! As Harry Potter! Genius, right?"

I glared at him. "No, it's not genius! You look exactly like me!"

"Yeah, don't worry about that. It'll only be for one day and then I'm only going to perform with your band for the talent show. Which starts in two and a half hours, I should probably start getting ready for that. So, sorry about this but I'm gonna have to leave now. Behave. Bye!" And before I could do anything but stare at him he ran out the bathroom, locked the door, and cast a silencing charm on the entire room. It seems like my awesome qudditch abilities didn't help me this time.

I banged on the door loudly and shouted. "CREEVEY! YOU BETTER OPEN THIS DOOR RIGHT NOW! I'M GONNA KILL YOU WHEN I GET OUT OF HERE AND TRUST ME THAT WILL BE SOONER THAN YOU THINK!" When I continued to hear nothing, I sighed and slid down the door until I was sitting. I banged my head repeatedly on the door but I got a bad headache so I stopped soon.

I didn't even try to open up the door by yanking the doorknob because I knew that the door was locked by Creevey. Jeez, I knew that he was obsessed with me but not this much.

TWO HOURS LATER:

So that brings me to the current moment, where I am still sitting in the same seat as two hours ago when I was taken captive. I never thought I would say that. That's my life for ya.

I thought my life couldn't get any more complicated but now it has. Colin Creevey is off somewhere gallivanting as myself. And who knows what he'll do to my reputation when he steps foot on that stage and tries to sing. Although, technically, he'll be singing with my voice but I'm sure he'll find some way to make it sound bad. It'll probably sound like a premature mouse. Ugh, I'm just torturing myself thinking about it.

He's probably gonna wear tight leather pants and wear my beautiful hair either slicked back or sticking up completely straight. Then he's gonna trip over everything and forget the words to the song. Oh, my life is over.

'Whatever. Knock yourself out of it, Harry.' I told myself tiredly as I clumsily climbed to my feet. At least I was shoved in a bathroom and not a broom closet, cause I gotta go.

After taking care of my business, I crossed the room slowly and approached the door. 'Might as well.' I thought. 'It's not like I have any other options.' I reached toward the doorknob and turned it. Nope. Locked.

I sighed. I knew it. I'm gonna be stuck in here for the rest of my life. Before that thought could lead to even more depressing images, I reached behind and pulled my wand from my back pocket. Creevey didn't really think this through much if he didn't even take away my wand. Idiotic boob.

"Alohomora." I whispered as I cast the spell on the doorknob. Excited, I crossed my fingers behind my back and screamed when I heard the gentle click of the door opening.

YES! I did a little jig on the spot. Hips moving in circular patterns, hands doing eighties obscure dance moves, and girlish screams emerging from my mouth. Check, check, and check. I came out of my temporary gleeful mood and finally stepped out of my victim confines of two hours.  
And what I saw scared the shit out of me. All over the room were pictures of dead people. All over the walls were dripping with blood and near one of the torn and trashed beds was a fridge possibly full of peoples chopped body parts...heh...Just kidding. There was nothing there of that sort.

This was dorm in particular was covered with pictures of me on the walls. Oh dear Merlin. Most of them were of obviously from magazines, covers, and newspapers. And the scarier part was some of the pictures were obviously taken by people themselves. Pictures of me smiling, eating breakfast, eating dinner, laughing under the pale glow of the sun. Wow...these are really good pictures. If I wasn't so creeped out right now I would really recommend they become a photographer. They were that good. But at the moment I was the least concerned about that fact and more about the dozens of people congregated in the room staring at me.

There were dozens of them and they had pins of their chests with my face on it. One girl was standing at the front of the room standing before the others; I assumed she was the leader. It seems I had walked into some sort of fan club dedicated to me.  
"Oh, no." I said aloud when I saw the hungry and longing looks on their faces. They continued to stare. I stared back. Nobody moved for ten minutes until a girl happened to enter the dorm and let out a very loud, long, and high pitched scream. And that's what broke the daze that had seemed to cover the entire room.

All of them ran over to me and I was still too disoriented to do anything about it. The members of HPFC crowded around me and attacked me into a huge bear hug. I can't say I wasn't pleased. They didn't seem to be that half bad in looks. So with that in mind I eagerly hugged them back and for the next few minutes that was all that commenced.

Next, I got to talking with them and realized these girls were some of the sweetest and kindest people I had ever had the pleasure of talking to. Sweet, kind, funny, they were almost the exact opposite of what I had previously thought girls in a club based on me would be like.

Pretty soon the whole room was vying on my needs and while I was kind of annoyed on how many times they can fluff my pillow I was secretly quite flattered. Plus, the attention wasn't so bad, especially since it seemed to have come with endless slices of my personal favorite, treacle tart.

After a while I seemed to come out of my happiness enough to ask what time it is. When Rebecca replied that is was 9:28 I politely said thank you and remained seated until I realized what that actually meant…

In two minutes Colin Creevey will go onstage with my best mates and ruin my reputation forever! As I jumped up, I explained to my newly required friends the current situation and they quickly ushered me up.

"Okay. Now you can't go the ball dressed like that. How 'bout this?" Ella took out her wand and flicked it so that my outfit turned from a grungy mess to a sleek leather jacket, a white t-shirt, and messy but spiked hair.

I thanked her profusely before I took off down the stairs and to the entrance hall. I had less than two minutes to get down there before Colin possibly ruined my life.

Let's hope I get there in time.

COLIN'S POV

Ah, life as Harry Potter is good. I'm going to be performing with my band the Marauders 2.0 in front of the entire school in less than two minutes. And the chicks seem to dig me except the one who burst out crying and slapped me when I said she had a hot ass. Hormonal women, they're everywhere. You think you're acting suave and confident but then they throw you a curve ball and the next thing you know you're being slapped across the cheek with their nails digging into your skin.

Ow. I can just imagine it again.

Ron gave me the signal to get on stage. Finally, show time. After months of careful planning, finally I'm getting my moment of the spotlight. Finally, nobody's going to be thinking, "Oh, Colin Creevey. What an idiotic boob!" Except…they can't really tell that I'm Colin since I'm Harry right now…

'Whatever.' I thought as I climbed the stairs and onto the stage they had conjured in the entrance hall.

'It's show time.' I thought as I heard the opening notes of the guitar and opened my mouth to sing. Immediately, my voice went weird and I chocked a little.

HARRY'S POV

I ran through the halls at lightning speed and finally reached the doors when I heard the familiar opening notes of 'Take me Out' by Franz Ferdinand. Oh, no, they've started. Before I reached the doors I heard a strangled 'So' :the first word that needs to be sang.

Thank god, I had brought my invisibility coat or I couldn't have burst in there when my exact replica is singing on the stage.

Quickly, I threw the invisibility cloak over me and banged the Great hall doors loudly. They ricocheted back in forth in my wake and everyone at the Christmas Ball turned to see who had entered and found nobody. Thank Merlin.

With the cloak on firmly I ran forward to the stage and climbed on not even bothering to mask the loud sounds of my feet. Great, now everyone's going to think Harry Potter was kidnapped by a ghost. Whatever.

With a loud rebel yell, I jumped onto his back, shouting incomprehensible things at the top of my lungs. Reaching over quickly, I put my hands over his neck and let all my inhibitions go. I squeezed none too gently and continued to scream.

And so it seems like Harry Potter is having a spastic episode. He was flailing his arms everywhere, incorrectly trying to get something off his back. It seems to be that Potter has finally lost his mind. Shouting random and non-understandable words while his mouth remains closed is surely a sign that his sanity has temporarily gone rouge. Oh dear lord.

He seems to be getting strangled too. Gasping for breath and oxygen when there is nobody even there strangling him. Where has the world gone?

Wow. That looks like it hurt...really bad. I think he broke a couple ribs on the way down. Ouch. It seems like he's been knocked unconscious.

Whew. After jumping off my back I instead roughly pushed Creevey in a certain direction and it seems that direction just happened to be the edge of the stage. Yay. But it doesn't seem like anybody really wanted to catch him when he inevitably was thrown off the stage. So, instead, he planted right onto the hardwood floor after a five foot drop with dozens of people crowding around him in shock. Oh dear lord, my reputation is ruined.

Quickly I levitated Creevey and cast a spell on him that would transport him into his dorm that is currently locked with a seventh year locking charm. No way he'll get out of there by the end of the day. I still felt that creeping sense of guilt so I sent him instead to the hospital wing. There he can get patched up and all.

With him gone I went behind the stage quickly, with the cloak still on, threw it off, fixed my hair, and walked suavely back onto the stage. As I came into view, everyone still stared blankly at me. Even the teachers. Just stared. But I paid that no mind and instead climbed the stairs to the stage and signaled for Seamus and Neville to start the song from the beginning.

Both of them looked at me very strangely but started all the same. I bobbed my head up and down to the beat and soon started singing.

"So if you're lonely. You know I'm here waiting for you, I'm just a crosshair. I'm just a shot waiting for you and if you leave here you leave me broken shattered alive. I'm just a crosshair. I'm just a shot...then we can die." I stared at the crowd with intense eyes and pretty soon some of the audience came out of their shock and moved a little. By the end of my sentence all of them were jumping and singing along. Some were even trying to touch me while I'm on the stage. It looked like we were at a real concert. Wicked.

"OOoooAhhhhhh!" Ron sang into his microphone. I have to say, we sound really good.

"I know I won't be leaving here. I know I won't be leaving here with you." At this part a couple of girls shouted. "YES YOU ARE!" I blushed a little.

And here comes the best part. Bah-bah-bah-ba-ba-ba-bah. Bah-bah-bah-ba-ba-ba-bah. Dididididididi didididi.

"I say don't you know. I say you don't know. I say...take me out! I say you don't show. Don't move time is slow. I say...take me out." And so the song continued, I continued to sing and groove. Shake. Boogie. Whatever you want to call it...in fact, it's kind of like the little groove I did after I got out of that bathroom...

Two minutes later, I got so into the song, and into this weird daze where the only thing I could hear was the music that I jumped into the crowd. Unfortunately, and quite fortunately, something else happened.

GINNY'S POV

I was enjoying watching the man of my dreams rock it out when I felt myself being permanently jostled. Whoever it was was pissing me off. How dare the interrupt my day dream?

"MOVE! I'M TRYING TO SEE THE MAN OF MY DREAMS!" Someone shouted and when I saw who it was, I glared.

Draco. Draco Malfoy was intruding on my territory.

"Excuse me? Draco? Finally gone mad? Because I thought it was quite obvious that Harry is MINE!" I said kind of bitchy. But whatever, he should have known what he was getting into.

Draco snorted. "Huh. I could say the same about you." He pushed me into the person behind me. Oh, it is so on.

I shoved him back and displayed an affronted expression before shoving me back. I pushed him back. He did the same.

I glared. And glared. He glared back. Oh dear, now we're in a glaring contest. Well, I'll be damned if I lose!

Twenty seconds later...

Jeez, he just doesn't give up, does he?

Twenty seconds later...

God, looking in his eyes for too long is freaking me out. I think I'm being possessed! Damn! Water! I need water! Maybe the demon will come out when I splash water on me!

To the outside observer, it doesn't even seem like I'm thinking these thoughts at all. No need to subject the world to my insanity.

Anyway...ten seconds later, finally, Draco looked away. YES! I won!

"YES! I won! I won! Suck it, Draco!" I did a little jig while I celebrated. Hips moving in circular patterns, hands doing eighties obscure dance moves, and girlish screams emerging from my mouth. Check, check, and check.

I paused and looked in horror when I saw why he had stopped. Harry's legs were crouched and it seemed like he was going to do a stage dive. And to my quick calculations, if he did jump...he'd land right over...Draco. And I can't let that happen. No siree.

Draco had a dreamy and longing smile on his disgusting face when Harry seemed to fall over us in slow motion. Jeez, is it just me or is everything is slow motion now?

As Harry fell and executed his stage dive, I vaguely remember shouting "NOOOO!" in a slow manner before shoving Draco out of the way and standing under the spot myself.

And before I knew it...BAM! I fell backwards and Harry fell on top of me. The crowd gathered around us and stared at us.

I feel really awkward right now...can't they just stop staring? God, it's not like we started having sex in front of all of them.

...why isn't anyone saying anything?

Harry grinned at me from up top. "You know, we should really stop meeting like this."

"Heh, huh, huh, heh. That's funny." I chuckled awkwardly.

"Remember what we did last time we were in this position?" Harry said while wiggling his eyebrows. Dear lord, do I remember. I don't think there's one day where I don't remember. The people around us gasped and someone shouted "THAT'S WHAT SHE SAID!"

I blushed from the memory of the kiss and what the guy had said.

"Huh. That's funny. Um...kinda true too. Huh...funny, funny." I babbled awkwardly. Mental slap on the head.

"Yeah, it was pretty funny. So," He looked down at my lips. "Want to continue where we left off last time?" I swear I almost melted when he said that.

"Huh. Um...right now? With everyone here? Looking at us?" I said peering at everyone else. Did he really expect to do this right now?

"I'll make you forget about them soon enough." Harry said with a weird look in his eye. Oh my god. His adorable face is getting closer and my eyes are shutting...

And then he kissed me. Sweetly and passionately, but still managing to melt my heart in the process. Damn him, he has made me forget about them, in, like, two seconds.

Hmm...he really is good...that's what she said.

You know it really is kind of uncomfortable having a 200 pound guy laying on you while giving you, possibly, the best kiss in your life.

Sigh...he just fits so perfectly with me...and he smells like...Old Spice. Plus, his lips taste like vanilla, which admittedly isn't a very guy like scent but, nonetheless, it's awesome.

All too soon for me, the kiss ended. And Harry stared into my eyes for a couple seconds. I didn't want to ruin the moment but I had to.

"Um...Harry? Could you get off? It's kinda uncomfortable." I mumbled.

"Oh...yeah." He stood up hastily. Sigh, I miss his warmth...that sounded really weird.

I stood up too. And stared hopefully at Harry. Does this mean were together?

I got my answer when Harry bent down and kissed me again. Yay! We're together!

The kiss deepened and I wrapped my arms around his delicious neck. Catcalls echoed all over the Great Hall but I didn't mind except when we broke apart and Harry hopped onto the stage again.

"Okay, now that that's over with, the Marauders 2.0 and I would like to sing another song for all you lovers out there. Ginny, this is for you...Oh and from Ron this is to Hermione." And then he sang the most offensive song in the world.

Just kidding. It was really romantic. And it went like this:

"Baby, I'm yours.  
And I'll be yours until the stars fall from the sky,  
yours until the rivers all run dry,  
In other words, until I die.

Baby, I'm yours  
And I'll be yours until the sun no longer shines,  
Yours until the poets run out of rhyme  
In other words, until the end of time

I'm gonna stay right here by your side,  
Do my best to keep you satisfied  
Nothing in the world can drive me away  
'Cause every day, you'll hear me say

Baby, I'm yours  
And I'll be yours until two and two is three,  
Yours, until the mountains crumble to the sea  
In other words, until eternity

Baby, I'm yours  
'Til the stars fall from the sky.  
Baby, I'm yours.  
'Til the rivers all run dry.  
Baby, I'm yours.  
'Til the sun no longer shines  
Baby, I'm yours.  
'Til the poets run out of rhyme."

Awww...I'm almost crying right now. That is so effing sweet.

And then he stepped down from the stage and kissed me again. I swear to god, I will never get used to the feeling I get from that.

"I really like you, Ginny." Harry whispered with his forehead resting on mine.

"I really like you, too." I said with total conviction. And then he kissed me again. For the third time today and the fourth time ever!

Yep, life can't get much better.

THE END


End file.
